By Zephyria 
Eun-ha often wondered exactly what Yeon-jun was doing out of his sight, in places he couldn’t know. He was curious about news of the boy that he wasn’t privy to, and he wanted to ask whenever he had the chance. Who are you with? What are you doing…?
However, knowing in his head that prying into every detail was excessive, he was in the process of cultivating a patience he hadn’t planned for.
Yes. He certainly knew it intellectually. He knew he was definitely being excessive right now. It was natural to feel a sense of emptiness when someone who should normally be by his side suddenly vanished. But it should have stopped there; there was no need to think of the boy every single minute.
To begin with, the life they had shared until recently, spending most of their day together, was only temporary. It was a foretold future that they wouldn’t be able to see each other as often once the new semester began. It had been a leisure with a predetermined end.
Furthermore, the boy naturally had his own life, and since they each had worlds that didn’t overlap, it was impossible to stay glued to one another forever.
Therefore, there was no need to fret over not knowing the specific details of his current whereabouts. He was probably doing fine on his own. He was probably doing everything well. Because that’s the kind of kid he was. The kind of kid who does well wherever he is and receives high praise accordingly.
He knew all of that in his head.
And yet, he couldn’t stop worrying. An inexplicable restlessness came as a bonus.
As if he were someone obsessed.
Obsessed? For a moment, Eun-ha’s heart chilled, and his expression sank coldly, as if an unwelcome memory had surfaced.
Soon, brushing back his hair somewhat irritably, he trudged over to the sofa and sat down.
Let’s keep it light.
It’s probably just a temporary symptom caused by the sudden change. He’ll be fine soon. Humans are animals of adaptation.
So, stop caring. Don’t think too deeply. No, just stop thinking altogether…
Even as he thought this, he couldn’t stop his hand from fidgeting with his phone.
He managed, somehow, to swallow the urge to contact him more than necessary. They only exchanged simple messages regarding meals, as they did every day. Added to that, he would reply a couple of times to Yeon-jun, who would send cute emoticons saying he missed him.
Aside from that, he let the day slip away in a hollow solitude. Even though it was just a perfectly ordinary, utterly familiar daily routine, he was immersed in the feeling of being unbearably bored.
In the middle of it, he briefly returned to the cafe after a part-timer contacted him saying a couple of customers were making a scene and asking for the CEO. He felt that those exhausting moments of dealing with and kicking out the customers were actually preferable. At least then, he had no time to think of Yeon-jun.
And so, evening arrived.
Eun-ha sat at the dining table and stared blankly at the wall clock. Eight-thirty.
Next, he checked the pitch-black sky beyond the window and lowered his gaze to the phone in his hand.
He stared at the screen displaying Yeon-jun’s contact information for a long time before finally pressing the call button. He decided that after waiting this long, a phone call would be acceptable.
Or rather, he thought that perhaps it was getting too late for him to be coming home.
And before the ringing tone could pass three times, he heard the click of the call being answered. As always, the pickup was fast.
Hello, Hyung.
“Where are you?”
The answer to his abrupt question was innocent.
I’m just about to wrap things up and head home.
A voice that was entirely flat and calm. Only then did Eun-ha feel the turmoil that had been stirring in his heart settle down. And he still couldn’t understand himself for feeling this way.
“Dinner.”
I ate here. Aren’t you hungry, Hyung?
“I told you an hour ago that I already ate.”
Still. Like some snacks.
The consistency of the boy’s intention to encourage snacking made a small laugh leak out. But that feeling quickly shifted into a mood where nothing was funny. Hearing the voice brought relief, but at the same time, the feeling of thirst became even more intense.
He didn’t know why he felt such a strong desire to have him right in front of his eyes this instant.
Of course, it was possible to miss him. That was a natural emotion.
But this, really…
“…”
Eun-ha bit his lower lip, as if denying a certain hypothesis that had suddenly occurred to him.
He closed his eyes tight and opened them, hesitated for a moment, and then blurted out.
“Come home quickly.”
Huh?
He didn’t respond to the question, which sounded as if he had misheard. He felt a bit awkward, as if he were exposing his inner thoughts completely.
During the lengthening silence, the voice on the other end repeatedly checked the connection, asking, “Hello? Hyung?”
…What? Did it cut off?
“No.”
He answered stiffly in the end. Then, this time, silence fell on Yeon-jun’s end. For about three seconds.
After the silence, the boy let out a short “Ah,” as if he had suddenly reached a realization.
Soon, what reached Eun-ha’s eardrums was a faint, barely audible laugh. One that sounded extremely pleased.
“Why are you laughing?”
It’s nothing. I’ll be home soon.
“Yeah.”
I miss you too.
Eun-ha narrowed his eyes. He had never said that he missed him.
However, since it wasn’t a lie, he didn’t bother denying it and ended the call.
Yeon-jun arrived about twenty minutes later. He truly kept his word. At the sound of the door lock, which came sooner than expected, Eun-ha, who had been sitting still at the table, stood up immediately. He approached the entrance, dragging his slippers.
Yeon-jun, who was entering while closing the door, happened to glance over and discover Eun-ha.
Seeing Eun-ha standing right in front of the inner door, as if he had been waiting for this exact moment, Yeon-jun couldn’t help but smile.
Looking at Eun-ha’s characteristically dry and blank expression, Yeon-jun’s lips twitched before he finally broke into a soft, melting smile and stepped closer. Eun-ha habitually opened his arms to Yeon-jun, who leaned toward him. He was immediately pulled into a tight embrace.
Feeling a bit better at the pressure of the weight leaning into him, Eun-ha wrapped his arms around the boy’s waist.
“Hyung—.”
It was just as he was thinking that the drawn-out pronunciation of “Hyuuuung” was cute.
“I’m seriously so happy.”
“About what?”
“Why do you like me so much?”
“You like me more.”
“That’s true.”
No, it’s not. You’re the one who likes me more. No, wait, you… Eun-ha had expected a childish back-and-forth, but since he received a pure affirmation, he pulled his head back, narrowed his eyes, and gave Yeon-jun’s forearm a light smack.
“What’s true about that?”
Why did the idiom “the one who loves more loses” exist? He didn’t like the attitude of admitting to being the underdog.
However, regardless of the rebuke, Yeon-jun smiled and leaned in again. Like a spoiled child, he buried his face in the crook of Eun-ha’s neck and rubbed his cheek. Eun-ha exhaled slowly while being held tightly once more. A sliver of relief rose from the moderate pressure.
Literally, to some extent.
The reason it wasn’t complete relief was that a subtly unfamiliar scent wafted from within the embrace. It was a feeling slightly different from the refreshing scent of Yeon-jun he knew well.
It was a natural consequence of having been outside for a long time, and he knew that intellectually, but once again, a grating sensation arose in a corner of his heart. An unwelcome, absolutely unwanted anxiety.
‘…At this rate.’
It was now difficult to deny it any further. He was anxious. Facing the emotion he had been desperately trying to ignore for the past few days, the light faded from Eun-ha’s pupils, and he clicked his tongue inwardly. As if he were utterly disgusted with himself.
This was not a good thing.