#099

Receiving a blessing from a god who is suffering a terrible punishment after committing treason?

Is there any more certain way to ruin one’s life than this?

‘Nope, absolutely not.’

Loclem might be a heinous and cruel god, no different from an Othergod. He might have committed unspeakable atrocities and is simply hiding them by erasing the records.

But so fucking what?

I didn’t surrender to the Church of Order because Loclem is the embodiment of true justice, pure goodness, or a flawless being.

I simply judged that a world ruled by Loclem is better to maintain.

If the choice is between living in a dystopia full of control and oppression—even if it looks like a utopia—by closing one’s eyes and ears, versus surviving in an apocalypse overrun by lawless thugs, isn’t the former the obvious choice?

At least the former provides clean water, proper food, and a safe place to sleep.

‘If I had to choose between the red pill that reveals the truth about the world collapsing and the blue pill that lets me forget everything and return to my daily life, I’d pick the blue pill every single time.’

I’m not some savior destined to save the world, so why the hell should I take the red pill?

If an incompetent guy like me takes the red pill, all that happens is one more Unit failing a SAN Check.

“A curse… you say?”

As soon as Athanas turned around, the letters scattered quickly again. It looked exactly like cockroaches scattering the moment a light is switched on. Disgusted, I handed the wax tablet to Athanas.

“To be precise, it seems to have been contaminated by the God of Records. It says that if Athanas, you come to the library without telling anyone and receive a blessing from him, you can learn the truth erased by the hand of Order. What an absurd trick! I swear, I have absolutely no intention of sympathizing with a god who committed treason. I don’t want anything to do with him!”

I snitched without hesitation. Since I had already driven a wedge between them by telling Athanas not to trust the God of Records, the option of cooperating with the God of Records had completely vanished.

‘If I try to brush it off as nothing in a situation like this, that’s when the catastrophe begins.’

Once you’re branded as suspicious, there’s truly no turning back. How can someone believe that a person who lied once is now telling the truth?

Athanas had already warned me. Every time I acted unreliably, I would lose his trust.

‘If I’m seen as incompetent, I’ll just be discarded and that’ll be it, but if I look suspicious, I might be classified as a target to be eliminated.’

Therefore, I must never lie in front of Athanas. Even if someone tries to turn him against me, he should think, ‘Hmm. I should just ask him directly.’

‘I should at least be given the chance for a final defense.’

“For your information, it was you, Athanas, who wrote on that wax tablet. I was just holding it. This means I wasn’t the one cursed. I believe the God of Records was able to exert influence because it was a ‘Record’ generated within the library. So, if we just destroy that wax tablet….”

“What did I write here?”

“Since I was told that any unauthorized knowledge would be forgotten the moment I left the Main Hall, I summarized the things I learned.”

“…Could you tell me in more detail what happened inside?”

I explained everything I remembered as detailed as possible. That Callister gave us a chance to ask the great ‘collective unconscious,’ that Athanas suddenly blocked my chance to ask, and that after making an excuse to leave the area, I told him my suspicion that it seemed related to the Research Director.

However, I couldn’t mention the fact that I had confirmed the Research Director was eavesdropping thanks to the System window.

‘If I make an excuse that I used some kind of detection ability, it’ll be awkward the next time I’m in the same situation.’

Seeing as the Influence window didn’t pop up again even when Andrea shed tears of emotion, it seemed Influence only works once per person. If so, there’s no way for me to know if the Research Director is wiretapping next time.

‘If I honestly explain Influence, I feel like it’ll just invite unnecessary suspicion….’

“…I’m not entirely sure, but I think someone was eavesdropping. I didn’t feel anything, but you acted as if someone was listening.’

This was the best I could say. Athanas nodded.

“You likely acted that way because you were wary of the Research Director. The apostles of Ledeia can feel the senses of every ‘Sacred Vessel’ within the Sanctuary. This means anyone who has received the Blessing of Healing even once becomes the eyes and ears of the Research Director inside the Sanctuary.”

“…Is it okay to create a Sanctuary without permission? Shouldn’t it be reported?”

“The fact that the Research Director has a secret laboratory is already known. The upper echelons of the Church are likely already aware that the laboratory is located in the Main Hall. Among the information I cannot access, there were reports auditing that secret laboratory.”

…They know, but they just leave it be?

Are they insane?

“Unless evidence is found that the experiments conducted inside violate the Doctrine, it will be difficult to accuse the Research Director. Rather, the fact that you accessed secrets you weren’t supposed to know would be the problem. Usually, such things are erased by Oblivion, but since Oblivion doesn’t work on you, I don’t know what kind of punishment you would receive.”

‘So if I speak up, I’m the only one who gets fucked.’

I rubbed my arms, which had developed goosebumps.

“…By the way, did I ever mention that I have a constitution that is immune to Oblivion?”

“You did.”

‘Really?’

“When?”

“…The fact that I know must mean you told me with your own mouth at some point, right?”

‘Well… that’s true.’

I let out a groan. Since Athanas was so certain, I must have been mistaken.

‘When did I reveal it?’

Maybe when I was explaining why it was okay to be alone with Andrea, a vassal of an Othergod. Or maybe when I made an excuse that the Distorted One’s creature wasn’t as dangerous as expected….

“Now that I think about it, I might have mentioned it.”

“…….”

“Anyway, this investigation has hit a dead end here.”

I found out the Research Director was suspicious, but continuing the investigation was too dangerous.

‘Rather than investigating the secret laboratory, it would be safer to just ask the Saintess directly why she’s leaving the player alone.’

Or maybe I should just call out all the player names I know.

If I’m dragged to the research center, I’ll definitely be subjected to some horrific experiments….

‘…But when I say horrific experiments, what specifically does that mean?’

If pain is inflicted on an experimental animal without purpose, that act cannot be called an experiment.

Because an experiment is the act of obtaining measured values to prove a hypothesis.

Unless they wanted to obtain measured values related to pain, there was no reason for a researcher to go out of their way to torture the subject.

‘Even for a human outside of Order, the physical structure isn’t that different, so they wouldn’t gain much from dissecting me….’

Experiments like whether the effects of a Sacred Relic can be maximized through artificial martyrdom don’t necessarily require a being from outside Order.

Since the number of experimental subjects is too small, they wouldn’t be able to waste them recklessly….

‘What is the Research Director’s main research topic?’

Isn’t there a thesis or something? I’d like to read it.

“Are there any books written by the Research Director?”

“…I heard that related records are on the 6th floor of the library.”

The moment I heard that answer, I quickly gave up.

The floor where the great ‘collective unconscious’ resided was the 6th floor.

‘If I go back there, I’ll definitely be fucked.’

It’s already strange enough that someone whose memories were erased would head straight to the 6th floor upon arriving at the library; if they then start opening books I wrote?

Even if I were the Research Director, I’d be so intrigued that I’d come running.

“Is there nowhere else besides the Main Hall?”

“Why are you so curious about the Research Director?”

“Huh? Well, I need to know what kind of person he is to be more careful. I need to know what he researches to predict his range of movement, and if I happen to encounter him, I can give a reason why I’m unsuitable as a research subject to escape safely.”

Athanas frowned.

“…That doesn’t seem like a very good idea. If anything, it will only attract more interest.”

I rolled my eyes.

‘I can’t exactly tell him about Forced Persuasion….’

“Um, right. But I can only know that I shouldn’t do such things if I understand what kind of person the Research Director is. That’s why I want to know. I’m also curious if that phenomenon called the ‘collective unconscious’ is part of some research. It definitely seems related to the Watched Ones….”

“It is likely a simple trap.”

“…A trap?”

“Are we not also doing things that only the Watched Ones would react to in order to find them? The Research Director is doing the same. He likely designed it in a structure that a Watched One like you couldn’t help but be interested in.”

‘That place is simply a spot to lure in players?’

Athanas’s deduction was quite plausible.

Hadn’t I also concluded the moment I saw the place that it was a point collection center established by a ‘Pioneer of Civilization’?

The moment a player sees a device that answers anything, they will surely ask questions like ‘What is the capital of the USA?’

‘Because if it answers such a question, it’s certain to be a device made by another player.’

But what if the act of asking the device was itself a test to identify players?

‘…In that moment, you’d be exposed as a player.’

Furthermore, the memory of asking the question disappears the moment you leave the library.

The player is unaware that their identity has been exposed, while the Research Director knows exactly who the player is.

‘If I had said something a player would typically say there….’

A chill ran down my spine.

“How did you know that? You said you don’t even remember going there….”

“I told you that I stopped you from asking. That means if you had asked something there, something unpleasant would have happened.”

I was impressed.

‘You have to be at this level to be the protagonist of a game.’

To be so certain that his actions in that situation were the best, even after his memories vanished.

If it were me, I would have considered the higher possibility that I had panicked and just done some meaningless digging….

“How can you figure things out so quickly? That’s truly amazing!”

“…It is all the result of effort.”

With those words, Athanas snapped the wax tablet he was holding in half with a loud crack. I flinched.

“I-is it okay to break it like that?”

“Did you not ask me to dispose of it?”

“No, I just thought you’d do some kind of special processing….”

“I will burn it after breaking it.”

Athanas tore the wax tablet into pieces with his bare hands.

I felt a bit intimidated.

‘His grip strength is insane….’

Athanas stared at me intently.

“…You promised me, didn’t you? That you would never go to the library alone.”

“Yes, yes!”

“You must keep that promise.”

“Of course! I’ll never go!”

‘As if I’m crazy enough to go?’

It was an answer filled with sincerity, but Athanas, still finding me unreliable, insisted on making me take a formal vow.

“I promise that I will never again take an interest in the Research Director, nor the God of Records.”

It was the very promise that, if broken, would result in losing only ‘trust.’

But I was confident I would never break it. Why would a coward like me voluntarily visit the library?

* * *

It was when I came out after finishing my volunteer work at the orphanage.

A pitch-black shadow suddenly blocked my path.

“Fabio.”

‘Shit!’

I was so startled I almost bit my tongue.

‘Why is Callister here?’

Seeing a person with no blood in their face and long black hair standing there in the dim night, he looked like a ghost, and it gave me the creeps.

My back became drenched in cold sweat.

‘Was there an option where he comes to find me?’

I quickly racked my brain.

What was Callister’s business in finding me?

Did he come to test if I remember him? To see if Oblivion worked?

‘…I must absolutely pretend not to remember.’

“Is your name Fabio?”

Pretending to be wary of a stranger, I kept my mouth shut and didn’t answer.

Callister gave a creepy smile and handed me a wax tablet.

“You left this at the library.”

“…I-I don’t think that’s my item.”

I crossed my arms and stepped back, signaling that I had no intention of taking it. Callister tilted his head.

“That can’t be. Your name is written right here.”

As Callister flipped the wax tablet, the letters carved into the wooden board were clearly visible.

‘Fabio, Fabio, Fabio, Fabio, Fabio.’

I was aghast inside.

‘Who the hell writes their name five times on their own stuff!’

Chapter 100