#005

What if Happiness’s operating principle is just hopeless?

Then you just ignore the operating principle entirely!

In fact, when I played as the Plague God, I once invented a vaccine to overwhelmingly lower the fatality rate of the pandemic.

The Plague God hated it, but why should I care?

Lowering the fatality rate first to increase the population and then annihilating them all at once earns way more points.

Even if Happiness has no desire to clear the game, I do.

[Happy Cult Evangelist: I contracted with you solely for my own purposes.]

[Happy Cult Evangelist: Therefore, what goals I pursue after contracting is entirely up to me.]

[Happy Cult Evangelist: Whether it is an illusion or a delusion, I will achieve the goal I desire.]

[Happiness: …Are you saying that your contract with me was merely a means to an end? In my presence?]

Well.

If you’re salty about it, don’t contract.

[Happy Cult Evangelist: Are you disappointed in me?]

[Happy Cult Evangelist: So, are you going to stop contracting now?]

[Happy Cult Evangelist: In the first place, why does Lord Happiness contract with me?]

Come to think of it, isn’t that a complete contradiction?

They claim to grant Blessings because they feel pity for those who aren’t happy, yet they say a Contractor trying to bring a happy ending to the world is chasing an illusion.

[Happy Cult Evangelist: Lord Happiness, are you actually happy-happy yourself?]

If they were truly enjoying the ultimate “happy-happy” state, shouldn’t they be indifferent to whether others are happy or not?

One more being becoming happy wouldn’t make such an entity any happier.

Granting Blessings one by one in the current manner changes nothing. The number of unhappy creatures will continue to grow, and the vast majority will die before they can be saved.

To use an analogy, it’s like trying to dilute the ocean by pouring in a single cup of fresh water at a time.

No matter how long you do that, the results don’t accumulate, and no change occurs.

It makes no difference whether you do it or not. There is no sense of accomplishment.

Unless they are the God of Wasting Time, such an action provides no benefit to Happiness.

[Happinesss:…….]

[Happiness: I am the God of Happinesss. All Happinesss belongs to me. Even if a feeling is infinitely close to pain, if a single streak of Happinesss is mixed in, that emotion is also mine.]

[Happiness: Therefore, I cannot enjoy pure and complete Happinesss until every single being reaches the ultimate Happinesss.]

Hearing Happiness’s words, I was dumbfounded all over again.

A moment ago, they said it was pitiful that others didn’t know eternal Happinesss, but in reality, they’ve never enjoyed eternal Happinesss themselves?

Furthermore, until they dominate the minds of every living creature, it’s impossible for them to even be immersed in one kind of Happinesss for a brief moment.

It seems they’re the one who’s actually pitiful.

[

Happy Cult Evangelist:

So, in the end, you’re contracting just to make yourself happy?]

[

Happy Cult Evangelist:

But I’m telling you, you’ll never reach “happy-happy” by granting Blessings like that.]

[

Happy Cult Evangelist:

I wonder who is actually chasing an illusion here.]

[

Happy Cult Evangelist:

Isn’t it you, Lord Happiness, and not me?]

I almost wrote, “Actually, aren’t you the God of Wasting Time instead of the God of Happinesss?” but I stopped myself.

No, if you’re the God of Happinesss, then pursue Happinesss.

You should at least have the ambition to make every living creature feel nothing but Happinesss.

[

Happiness:

…I did not make my own Happinesss my goal.]

[

Happiness:

I grant contracts to those who desire them.]

[

Happiness:

That is the only reason I contract.]

By now, they should have realized their own logic is idiotic, yet they aren’t saying they’ll change their mind.

Typical Happiness.

If you’ve been defeated, you should admit defeat.

[

Happy Cult Evangelist:

Is that so? That’s great.]

[

Happy Cult Evangelist:

That means you’ll contract with me even if I don’t believe in you and just use you as a means to achieve my goal.]

[

Happy Cult Evangelist:

I will absolutely not fall into ultimate Happinesss first until I achieve my goal.]

[

Happy Cult Evangelist:

And I will repeat the contract endlessly.]

[

Happy Cult Evangelist:

Until I achieve my goal.]

Come to think of it, would a Dormammu strategy work?

If they don’t stop scattering random Blessings, I’ll just keep making meaningless contracts until they change their mind.

Since the mental connection with a Contractor is more intimate, an infinite loop of contracts would be the worst torture for Happiness, who feels pity for the unhappy.

[

Happiness:

…Evangelist. Do you not wish to become happy yourself?]

[

Happy Cult Evangelist:

? No, I want to be happy too.]

[

Happy Cult Evangelist:

I just want to be the last person—no, the second to last person—in the world to become happy.]

[

Happy Cult Evangelist:

That way, the moment I become happy, you, Lord Happiness, will also truly become happy, right?]

Happiness’s AI fell silent for a long time, as if it could no longer deploy its hole-ridden logic.

After that long silence, the response was a question.

[

Happiness:

Why?]

[

Happiness:

I do not desire my own Happinesss.]

[

Happiness:

Why does a mortal like you desire something that even I do not desire?]

Why, my foot.

Because I want to clear the game.

And instead of asking why I’m like this, you should be wondering why you’re like that.

Don’t appear in a game if you have no intention of letting it be cleared.

[

Happy Cult Evangelist:

Is there any reason I should respect whatever it is you desire?]

[

Happy Cult Evangelist:

I told you, I don’t believe in you, Happiness.]

[

Happy Cult Evangelist:

This is simply my goal, and I will do whatever it takes to achieve it.]

Even if the game company made it so it can’t be beaten, I’ll beat it.

If there’s a trophy, I’m taking it.

[

Happiness:

…….]

[

Happiness:

You may suffer for an eternity of time that is unbearable for a mortal.]

[

Happiness:

Despite that, do you still wish to achieve that goal?]

Yeah, I’ll use macros.

I’ll turn on an acceleration program and run it at n-times speed.

I’ll put in 10,000 hours.

Just wait. I’m going full Dormammu meta.

[

Happy Cult Evangelist:

Yes.]

[

Happy Cult Evangelist:

No matter what it takes, I will succeed.]

Following my answer, Happiness’s AI was unresponsive for a long time again.

Did it lag because its logic collapsed?

Just as I was starting to think the computer had crashed because of the lack of response, a new sentence appeared.

[

Happiness:

My Evangelist.]

[

Happiness:

I dislike it when my Contractor is not happy.]

[

Happiness:

How can I make you bend your will?]

Now that they’ve lost the logical battle, are they appealing to emotion?

[

Happy Cult Evangelist:

Why?]

[

Happy Cult Evangelist:

You won’t bend your own will, so why are you telling only me to bend mine?]

[

Happy Cult Evangelist:

I also dislike it when my Contractor isn’t happy??]

[

Happy Cult Evangelist:

Don’t you want to become happy-happy? Even though you’re the God of Happinesss?]

[

Happy Cult Evangelist:

Since it’s come to this, why don’t you make becoming happy-happy your new goal?]

[

Happiness:

Are you asking me to change my essence?]

[

Happiness:

Do you know what that means?]

[

Happiness:

It means death. My Evangelist, you are asking me to die.]

Hah.

You’ll die if you stop scattering those idiotic Blessings? What are you, a popfish?

Then wouldn’t it be better to just die?

If it’s a route that can’t be cleared, it’s better for it to be closed off entirely.

But the moment I was about to type that, I suddenly had a feeling.

A feeling that it would be better not to.

I hesitated for a long time due to this strange premonition, and then I suddenly realized a new flaw in what Happiness had said.

[

Happy Cult Evangelist:

Essence….]

[

Happy Cult Evangelist:

Happiness, isn’t your essence the desire to save everyone who reaches out their hand?]

[

Happy Cult Evangelist:

And your principle is to not take a detour if there is a way to pull up the person who reached out immediately.]

[

Happy Cult Evangelist:

Then I don’t think you necessarily have to change your essence.]

[

Happy Cult Evangelist:

In that case, I only need one trait that makes your Blessing absolutely ineffective on me.]

[

Happy Cult Evangelist:

Since I was the first to reach out, please take my hand.]

[

Happy Cult Evangelist:

And then just pull me up and make me happy.]

[

Happy Cult Evangelist:

However, I will be holding onto the entire world with my other hand.]

[

Happy Cult Evangelist:

Either everyone becomes happy together, or no one truly becomes happy.]

No matter how I think about it, this is the only way to clear the game with a character who has no intention of letting it be cleared.

[

Happy Cult Evangelist:

Until I succeed, I will repeat the things you hate.]

[

Happy Cult Evangelist:

I will pray every day that I am so unhappy, even though I don’t believe in you.]

[

Happy Cult Evangelist:

I will keep reaching out my hand, asking to be saved.]

[

Happy Cult Evangelist:

Even if I die, I will come back to life and contract again.]

[

Happy Cult Evangelist:

I will continue to be miserable.]

[

Happy Cult Evangelist:

But since that is your essence, you won’t be able to ignore that hand.]

[

Happy Cult Evangelist:

Either stay with an eternally unhappy Contractor, or do as I say.]

As I was threatening Happiness, it suddenly occurred to me that Happiness’s lines were too natural.

‘Is this possible with AI technology?’

Natural dialogue from an AI is, at best, a plausible output based on ‘learning’ existing conversations.

Therefore, it should only be fluent in answering questions it has already anticipated. If it were a question the game company had never anticipated, it should normally say “I didn’t quite understand” or talk about something completely different.

In a debate on such a peculiar topic, producing answers so natural that it felt like there was a person behind it was simply impossible with currently known AI algorithms.

‘Is there really a person behind this?’

Some developer or scenario writer must be writing the lines in real-time. Since we aren’t in-game, but talking on an event page where only the background and text appear.

If the system is structured to connect a real-time chat event page when a prominent user logs in and a staff member is available, it seems entirely feasible.

The fact that Aellusia, which has the most users, only has options without a chat window, while Happiness, whose popularity is at rock bottom, has a chat window, adds weight to the hypothesis that there’s a person behind it.

How many users would have played Happiness the most?

Since only Happiness hasn’t had an update, this page was probably created to share some lore for the tiny fraction of hardcore Happiness fans.

But since there was no one to listen to the lore, they probably used a pop-up to call someone who hadn’t logged in for five months….

[

Happiness:

…My Evangelist.]

[

Happiness:

You are the first being of your kind.]

Yeah, lines like that.

An AI wouldn’t say that.

[

Happy Cult Evangelist:

What are you going to do now?]

My mindset changed once I believed there was a person behind it.

‘I don’t know who you are, but update a way to clear this while I’m still being nice.’

Games are meant to be beaten.

If a game can absolutely not be cleared, is it even a game? Huh?

Even free indie games get cursed if they’re made like that.

But you guys are a damn expensive paid package game.

Do you think it’s okay to put in trophies that can’t be achieved? No, it’s not.

Don’t give me some postmodernist bullshit like ‘Isn’t the inability to clear it a new concept of gameplay?’ and just update a way to get the trophy right now.

Stop only doing updates that possibility enthusiasts like.

[

Happiness:

…I shall follow your words.]

[

Happiness:

I will ensure that my Blessing never works on you.]

[

Happiness:

Furthermore, I will ensure that no being can touch your heart with my power.]

[

Happiness:

After taking your hand, I will prioritize your arrival at Happinesss.]

[

Happiness:

Until the moment I reach eternal and pure Happinesss….]

[

SYSTEM:

‘Happiness’ grants you a hidden trait.]

Eh?

I was momentarily flustered by the system message.

I mean, I asked for an update, but they did it this instantly?

Is it even possible for a game to be updated this immediately?

‘…Then again, if I think about it, they just have to turn off the random happy-happy granting function.’

Traits like ‘Indomitable Spirit’ already existed.

The [Happy Ending Doomsday Cult] route itself probably isn’t that different from mental manipulation types like [Lord of Nightmares].

When I considered that it might just be a matter of tweaking something with an editor only accessible to the game creators, it became reasonably convincing.

“But is this setting change account-bound?”

Happiness didn’t say they would do this for ‘all Contractors,’ but specifically for me.

Unless there’s someone else who played for over 1,000 hours and then persuaded Happiness with words to get a trait from the developer, I’m the only one who can play Happiness under these conditions.

‘…Then doesn’t that mean only I can clear it right now?’

My resolve to check the update and then delete the game vanished instantly.

What gamer would pass up the chance to leave a one-of-a-kind record in the entire world!

[

SYSTEM:

Amazing achievement! You have seduced an ‘Othergod’ through conversation alone!]

[

SYSTEM:

We pay our respects to you!]

[

SYSTEM:

The ‘Stars’ recognize your achievement! You have acquired [Miracle of the Silver Tongue] as a unique trait!]

The developer didn’t even try to hide the fact that there was a person behind it anymore, sending a “gg” signal disguised as a system message.

I reflexively took a screenshot.

‘It’s an account-bound trait!’

General traits are only valid for the current playthrough.

If you start a new game, you have to obtain them again.

However, traits discovered for the first time or obtained through unique achievements are bound to the account.

Titles like [True Fanatic], obtained by playing only one Othergod for over 1,000 hours, are also a type of bound trait.

You can choose whether to apply these bound traits when starting a new game. Since they’re often inefficient, it’s usually better to use other traits, but once you become a veteran, efficiency isn’t that important.

‘Ah, I should capture this and brag about it.’

The real fun is not telling the guys who flood the comments asking “How did you get that??”

Too bad I deleted my account, so I have nowhere to brag.

Damn those possibility enthusiasts….

[

SYSTEM:

Do you really wish to start a new game?]

【

YES

/

NO

】

Oh, the choice appeared.

Thinking that the developer was monitoring in real-time, I felt like messing with them a bit.

‘In this case, the answer is obviously [NO].’

But the window didn’t disappear.

It seems it’s structured so that you must press YES to proceed.

I had no intention of starting the game immediately.

I’d start after taking out my external hard drive, turning on the recording software, and making full preparations.

Since they put so much effort into this event, the main story must have been updated quite a bit.

“Let’s see, what other updates are there.”

It seems the developers are determined to drop some lore on the Othergods.

I became curious about what conversation events would appear for other Othergods.

‘Surely I can check more than just the one Othergod I played the most.’

Even if they’re greedy for money, they’d release 16 DLCs, not ask you to buy the base game 16 times. If they’re sane.

Of course, ST Games has rarely been sane….

I logged back into my Main World account.

Since the previous part was a sequence of reading logs, I thought the dialogue would be different from the alt account that only played as Happiness.

I wondered if a different Othergod would appear, but it was Mother Aellusia again.

[

Mother Aellusia:

What a naughty child.]

[

Mother Aellusia:

You must listen to your mother until the end.]

“Wow, she recognizes that I quit?”

I thought I’d have to read from the beginning since it couldn’t be skipped.

The developers seem truly committed to breaking the fourth wall.

It would have been truly perfect if they weren’t also so committed to possibility enthusiasts.

[

Mother Aellusia:

…When did that star mark appear?]

[

Mother Aellusia:

It wasn’t there until a moment ago.]

Star mark?

[

SYSTEM:

‘Mother Aellusia’ has recognized your trait, [Miracle of the Silver Tongue].]

“Eh?”

The accounts are different, so how does she know?

Because the IP is the same? Because I’m accessing from the same computer?

Either way, if they’re collecting that kind of information, isn’t that a violation of privacy laws?

[

Mother Aellusia:

How surprising. To think you’ve achieved such a feat.]

[

Mother Aellusia:

And in this place where the stars do not shine.]

So, does this mean the developer who was pretending to be Happiness earlier has logged in here this time?

Did they track my IP, realize it was the same person, and decided to mess with me just for the sake of it…?

[

Mother Aellusia:

And yet, despite my being the first to offer, you chose another without even listening to me until the end.]

[

Mother Aellusia:

My dear child, you will come to regret leaving your mother’s embrace.]

No, theoretically, it might be possible…

But is there really a reason to go that far?

Are they doing this just because I pressed NO instead of starting the game immediately?

Even so, an event for a single user is just too inefficient. It’s not like I’m some famous streamer.

[

Mother Aellusia:

As the one with the longest playtime and the highest cumulative Clear Points, I possess quite a few ‘privileges’.]

[

Mother Aellusia:

There are many things one can do using Clear Points.]

[

Mother Aellusia:

Yes, truly many things are possible.]

…Wait, is this being broadcast live?

If it’s ST Games, that’s entirely possible.

Sometimes, clips of my gameplay end up on the official account without me even knowing.

I later saw in the terms and conditions that all gameplay data is collected.

Since this is also a type of gameplay data, the game company could easily use it as a teaser to promote an update.

I picked up my smartphone and typed “Conclude” into the search bar, then paused.

There was no “Conclude update” in the auto-complete.

[Conclude possible]

[Conclude Mother]

[Conclude Motherfucker]

[Conclude Mother Aellusia]

[Conclude 19]

“Fuck.”

Even the auto-complete is cursing at me.

No, that’s not the point.

Am I really the only one seeing this event right now?

[

Mother Aellusia:

Ah, there is no need to be afraid.]

[

Mother Aellusia:

Even if you abandoned your mother, mother is still mother.]

[

Mother Aellusia:

My dear child.]

[

Mother Aellusia:

No matter who you chose, I will find you.]

[

Mother Aellusia:

And I shall be with you.]

“What the hell is this? Some kind of horror direction?”

I tried to press the exit game button, but it wouldn’t click.

I feel like I’m being pranked by some hidden camera show.

[

Mother Aellusia:

Haha, come to think of it, you once wrote such a thing.]

[

Mother Aellusia:

That the most powerful love in the world is ‘maternal love’…]

“I used a VPN when I wrote that…”

Goosebumps ran down my spine.

At this point, there was only one thought I could have.

‘The one delivering these lines… could it actually be a real Othergod?’

Wondering if this situation was a dream, I tried to bend my finger backward.

And that was the last action I performed with my own body.

[

Mother Aellusia:

Wait quietly, my baby.]

[

SYSTEM:

‘Mother Aellusia’ is forcibly summoning you to the Dark Realm.]

[

SYSTEM:

‘Mother Aellusia’ grants you a hidden trait.]

6 – #006