By Zephyria Why the hell do I have to do this?
Holding the poles and standing there, trembling, Yu-jin felt a sense of existential crisis. What’s so fun about riding these ridiculously long sticks and going down the snow? It’s hard enough to keep my balance.
“Wait, Yu-jin. Straighten your legs. No, keep your feet facing forward, skis parallel…”
Who cares!
Yu-jin barely managed to hold back the urge to shout. In fact, he already felt like crying, but he was holding it in. More than anything, it wasn’t easy to refuse and turn away from his daughter, who was happily snowboarding, even if she was just flailing around.
“Yu-jin, you’re arching your back too much.”
Winston said, grabbing Yu-jin’s pelvis. It was just a necessary touch, but Yu-jin didn’t like it either.
“It’s okay, just tell me.”
Yu-jin muttered and refused his help. But things in the world aren’t as easy as they sound. At least, handling his body on skis wasn’t. Winston let go, but Yu-jin couldn’t move at all from that position, just trembling. Winston, who had been watching the back of Yu-jin’s head, who was as helpless as a newborn calf, leaned in and whispered in his ear.
“Yu-jin, Angie will be going to college at this rate.”
He would have preferred Winston to lament about when he would start moving. Yu-jin wanted to snap at the words that sounded like pity, but he didn’t have the余裕. Inevitably, he glared at Winston with angry eyes, but Winston instead smiled brightly.
“Well, you might be able to get the hang of it before she enters high school.”
It was a tone that seemed like he was giving him a lot of leeway. But thanks to that, Yu-jin was barely able to lift his back. “Good job,” Winston said to Yu-jin, who had finally managed to get into position. “But don’t put too much strength into it, you’ll have muscle aches all over your body tomorrow.”
He wouldn’t even make it to tomorrow. Yu-jin already felt like his limbs were going numb, but he pretended not to. He mustered all his strength with the determination not to show any weakness in front of this man, and he barely opened his mouth.
“Is that it now?”
“Move your feet a little more to the outside, no.”
Winston, who had unconsciously reached out his hand, paused and looked at Yu-jin’s face. What is it now? As Yu-jin frowned and looked at him, Winston playfully asked.
“Can I touch you for a second?”
Yu-jin replied stiffly to him, who was gesturing exaggeratedly in the air.
“No.”
“Oh dear.”
Winston, muttering in a tone that was hard to tell whether he was disappointed or embarrassed, pointed to the tips of Yu-jin’s feet with his finger and said.
“Move that about 10 degrees to the side. No, a little more. No, more.”
He was so focused on moving his feet that he had no余裕 to pay attention to his surroundings. So Yu-jin didn’t realize it at all. That a girl was skiing down at full speed behind him.
“Oh, oh, ooh, oh!”
It was already too late when he realized he heard a loud shout. Before he could turn his head to check, something hit Yu-jin’s body hard. The body of the girl descending at full speed was more powerful than a boulder. Yu-jin was pushed away without even making a sound.
“Uh.”
“Yu-jin!”
The moment he heard Winston’s cry, which was different from before, a cold wind swept across his cheeks. And Yu-jin realized. That he was skiing. Of course, completely against his will.
“Ugh… Uwaaaaaaa!”
A scream burst out belatedly. He threw away the poles he was holding in a daze and flailed his arms as he went down endlessly. White snowfields quickly flashed past him. He couldn’t hear anything because of the wind. All he felt was speed, speed, speed.
“Help me!”
Yu-jin shouted in terror. Suddenly, the years he had lived flashed before his eyes like a panorama. The endlessly lonely nights he spent alone in the Separate Residence/Annex, the first kiss he shared with Winston, when he gave birth to Angela, the small body that fit snugly in his arms, the poor but happy days he spent with his child, and…
When he finally recalled the scene of Winston and Angela standing face to face wearing the same ski suit, and his own image mixed in it like a hallucination.
“Yu-jin!”
Along with a faint voice calling his name, someone suddenly grabbed his waist and snatched him up. His body seemed to sway greatly, and then he fell over as he was.
“Ah…!”
He let out a short exclamation like a scream and closed his eyes tightly. He felt a dull impact all over his body, and after a strong dizziness and his whole body shaking, he soon stopped. And suddenly, silence came to the world.
All he could hear was rough breathing. His own, and another man’s.
“Are you okay?”
Winston’s voice was heard from above his head. Mixed with the heavy breathing was a trembling voice, and Yu-jin hesitated and raised his head. A pale face was looking down at him. Yu-jin tilted his head, bewildered by the expression that seemed terrified that he might have been hurt somewhere.
“I’m okay, I’m not hurt anywhere, nowhere.”
“Really? You don’t hurt anywhere? Really?”
Winston hurriedly groped Yu-jin’s body here and there. Yu-jin tapped Winston’s cheek lightly, not feeling any lewd intentions in his busy gestures.”Calm down. I’m okay, really.”
Winston stopped moving, but the look on his face as he stared at Yu-jin was still full of fear. Yu-jin looked straight into his eyes and said once more.
“I’m okay, I’m not hurt.”
“Ah…”
Winston barely managed to let out a sigh, then took a trembling breath and finally closed his eyes.
“Thank goodness. God, I thought my heart was going to drop.”
Winston said that and hugged Yu-jin, taking a deep breath. For a while, the two of them lay there half-buried in the snow. The sunlight reflected in the snow stung Yu-jin’s eyes, and he frowned, raising a hand to make a shadow. The world was silent. As if they were the only two people there.
“It would have been better for you if I had disappeared.”
He spoke in a small voice, but it reached Winston’s ears all too clearly.
“What are you talking about?”
Winston asked, his face immediately turning pale. Feeling his gaze on him, Yu-jin continued in a calm voice.
“Isn’t it true? If I’m gone, you’ll be Angela’s only parent, so everything will naturally work out smoothly. It’ll be easier to inherit the estate, and you can marry anyone who suits you…”
Why did Evelyn suddenly come to mind? The fact that she was still alone bothered him for no reason. He knew it was rude to think this way without even knowing Evelyn’s intentions properly, but even as he scolded himself, asking what it mattered, he was still tormented by his complicated feelings, when Winston said with a stiff face.
“Don’t say that, ever again. I’ve never thought that way, ever. Lose you again for the sake of some inheritance? Don’t talk such nonsense…”
He shook his head as if suppressing his intense emotions. Winston let out a deep breath, then fell silent. Yu-jin didn’t speak either. For a while, they lay there quietly in the silence. Winston was the first to speak.
“The reason I asked if you had someone you were seeing wasn’t to blame you.”
His quiet voice was heard so clearly in the silent snowfield. Winston continued, speaking to the silent Yu-jin.
“It’s perfectly normal to date someone or have feelings for someone. Yeah, it’s none of my business. It will be in the future too, no matter who you meet, or… fall in love with.”
He paused, as if in pain, then opened his mouth.
“Regardless of me, that’s how it will be.”
His voice sounded painfully squeezed out. Yu-jin hesitated, then stealthily glanced at his face. Winston also turned his head at the tiny sound made by that small movement. Their eyes met, but neither looked away. For a while, the two of them just stared at each other.
Suddenly, he felt his heart beating dully. A faint blush rose on Yu-jin’s cheeks. Winston’s eyes narrowed.
Yu-jin’s eyelids slowly lowered. He saw Winston tilting his head in his narrowed vision, but Yu-jin simply closed his eyes. Already knowing what would happen next.
“Yu-jin.”
Winston whispered. His lips parted naturally. Ah, Yu-jin sighed softly. His breath seeped through his parted lips. And.
Finally, when their lips touched, his heart, which had been stirring slightly, began to pound violently.