By Zephyria How can I express this sense of pride, as if I own the name Sung Se-han?
“Kang Robin Sunbae is a hidden genius artist. Everyone will be surprised when it’s announced. The person who wrote, composed, and produced Perfect Puzzle’s debut album isn’t Kang Robin Sunbae, but Sung Se-han.”
“What? Is that true?”
“How does Tae-kyung Hyung know that?”
Haha. I couldn’t hide my expression because I kept laughing.
“I know everything. Because I know everything, if you’re curious about Sung Se-han, ask me anything. Should I explain how much of a genius he is?”
I didn’t know how to express my proud heart, so I hugged the laptop tightly.
“Uh, uh…?”
“Tae-kyung…?”
I could recognize that I was acting strangely enough to embarrass Gun-woo Hyung and Jeong-min. But I couldn’t bear it without hugging even the laptop.
“It’s been so long…”
I didn’t expect to see Sung Se-han in this restarted life. I didn’t dare to hope for the luck that our times would overlap like this. And now, Sung Se-han’s footsteps began to be heard again on the path I was walking.
“Ah… ha…!”
Was I dreaming another vain dream? Would I wake up and clutch my chest in the emptiness of dawn?
“It’s not a dream…”
I wish someone would tell me it’s not a dream.
That Sung Se-han in my arms right now is not an illusion. That I can see Sung Se-han, who will soon be twenty years old. That I can live while confirming Sung Se-han’s happy life with my own eyes.
That we are together in the same time. I wish someone would confirm it right away.
“Tae-kyung, are you… okay?”
Gun-woo Hyung was surprised and flustered, but I didn’t let go of the laptop I was holding. I hugged it so tightly that it would break, afraid that Gun-woo Hyung might take it away.
“Please give me this picture…!”
“Tae-kyung, what’s wrong…? You can download it in high quality as much as you want…”
Relieved by Gun-woo Hyung’s words, my legs gave way. I knelt on the floor as it was and bowed my back.
“Tae-kyung Hyung…?”
“Tae, Tae-kyung…!”
I couldn’t answer whoever was calling my name. Tears flowed silently, but the long-suppressed sobs came out as a loud noise.
“Ugh, sob…! Heong…!”
I comforted myself every day that I could endure it as long as I longed for him for the rest of my life.
That everything was okay.
That it was enough if Sung Se-han was living healthily somewhere.
That I was all right.
If I could give Sung Se-han a warm time with a humble wish, there would be nothing better than that.
That my heart was okay. I endured every day like that.
But now, I finally wondered.
How could I have endured the times without Sung Se-han? How could I have spent each day without Sung Se-han?
Only after Sung Se-han appeared in front of me did I realize that I hadn’t been breathing properly until now.
“Uheoeong… sob…!”
I didn’t know if I deserved to enjoy this much excessive happiness, so the tears didn’t stop.
But, why am I upset when I’m so happy?
I knew I had to kill the creeping greed, and I was so sad about that.
“Tae-kyung, what’s wrong? Huh? Does it hurt somewhere?”
“Tae-kyung Hyung! Should we go to the hospital?”
Gun-woo Hyung and Jeong-min were trying to lift me off the floor. But I hugged the laptop and lay down completely.
“Euheuk! Sob…!”
I wanted to be left alone to cry to my heart’s content today. If I cried without end, I would be able to come to my senses. I would let go of my greed and admit that all I could do was long for Sung Se-han.
And then we would be able to live hard for each other again.
Soothing myself like that, I had to endure this time again.
“Wow… that’s really too much!”
When I came out after taking a shower, Jeong-min, who was looking at the music charts at the dining table, was grumbling.
“They debuted before us! There are still five songs from Perfect Puzzle in the top 10! Isn’t that really too much? ‘Space War’ doesn’t even think about coming down from number 1. We were out of the charts in just three weeks, so it’s too much of a comparison! Does Perfect Puzzle have a grudge against us or something?”
“Talk some sense.”
Ho-soo, who was watching the charts together, frowned.
“Perfect Puzzle wouldn’t even be interested in us, so what grudge would they have?”
“Tae-kyung Hyung, aren’t you hungry? Should I make a salad?”
Soo-in, who found me, jumped up from the dining table.
“No. I’ll just drink some sparkling water.”
I sat at the dining table with a towel over my head. Soo-in, who took out sparkling water from the refrigerator, opened the lid and placed it in front of me.
“Tae-kyung, our activities are over, so you can eat what you want. Should we order something?”
Gun-woo Hyung put a banana in his mouth and opened the delivery app.
“I’m okay, so please order what the others want to eat.”
I didn’t eat much during the two-week debut activity period, but I didn’t feel very hungry.
Compared to that time, I’m doing better these days, so everything tastes good even if I eat something, and I’m not hungry even if I don’t eat.
“Are you really okay?”
“Yes. I’ll just drink this.”
It was all thanks to the phone in my hand.
I never let go of the phone full of Sung Se-han’s various videos and photos. Thanks to that, I could meet the living, breathing Sung Se-han whenever I wanted. I could make eye contact with him even in the videos. I was enjoying a positive mood in the brightened world.
“But it’s a bit of a shame that we couldn’t do activities with Perfect Puzzle. It would have been nice to build friendships with debut peers.”
Jeong-min looked at his phone and revealed his honest feelings.
“But, everyone there is so tall that I think we’d feel a bit inferior if we saw them in person? According to Friends’ Jin-wook Hyung, Sung Se-han is not like a human, so it’s hard to talk to him if you see him in person. He doesn’t smile well in real life and looks down on people. I bet he’d look down on us too?”
“Ho-soo.”
I was refraining from doing crazy things like talking as if I knew Sung Se-han well, but I couldn’t stand Ho-soo’s rumors.
“From what I’ve heard, Sung Se-han isn’t the type to look down on people.”
I needed to give our members at least some proper information.
“He sometimes acts like a psycho, but he treats people well when he’s in a good mood?”
“Tae-kyung Hyung, so you’re saying Sung Se-han is a psycho who only treats people well when he’s in a good mood?”
Ah… I was speechless, so I rolled my eyes for a moment and smiled softly.
“Even when he’s not in a good mood, he’s good at pretending to be nice when he needs to, and he puts up with people he likes.”
“What is that! He’s a complete double personality!”
“A double personality? It’s not that, it’s the ability to do well in social life even though he has such a bad personality…”
This, I feel like I’m falling deeper into a maze as I talk. It feels like I’m tarnishing Sung Se-han’s image every time I open my mouth…
Beep. Beep. Beep. Beep. Everyone turned their heads at the sound of the front door password being entered. The person who came in with loud footsteps was Doo-hyun Hyung.
“Guys!”
Doo-hyun Hyung, who appeared with a flushed face, called us and opened the refrigerator to take out bottled water and drink it.
“Doo-hyun Hyung, weren’t you off work?”
“How did you come back?”
When the members asked with bewildered faces, Doo-hyun Hyung put the water bottle on the table with a thud.
“Guys! You know ‘Star Light’, right?”
“Star Light? That, idol survival show?”
Surprised reactions popped out at the unexpected words. Doo-hyun Hyung, who nodded his head greatly, looked around at the members sitting at the table.
“I thought the team recruitment for that was already over, but suddenly we got an offer for our team! Filming starts on June 1st, so they told us to prepare!”
“Huh?”
“Really? Is it real?”
With excited expressions, the members jumped up from their seats. The younger members, who looked at each other as if they couldn’t believe it, turned their eyes back to Doo-hyun Hyung.
“No, how did our team get in?”
“I heard that only popular teams with more than 100,000 initial sales got in? Wasn’t the group that sold the least Pure Voice?”
“Yeah. Pure Voice dropped out and our team got recruited! I can’t believe it either!”
While listening to the excited members cheering, I sat there blankly.
I couldn’t easily accept what was happening. What did he just say? That we’re filming Star Light…?
That our Sky Blue is joining the idol survival show again, which Perfect Puzzle, Jumping Boys, Sun & Moon, True Heart, and Asla are doing?
“Meeting Perfect Puzzle…?”
The swirling thoughts in my head felt like they were about to explode, so I grabbed my head with both hands.
“Really, no way…!”
That I can see Sung Se-han up close…?