By Zephyria “Heong…! Heong! Se-han! I’m really in big trouble! Heo-eong! Keuheuk…!”
I fell face down and hit the floor with my fist, then suddenly got up again. No, this can’t be happening! Is this also a dream?
Slap! Slap! I slapped my cheeks with my palms, but it didn’t hurt at all. Suddenly, I saw a glimmer of hope.
“Ah…! It must be a dream!”
At that moment, the notification on my phone rang loudly like thunder. I slowly turned my head. The phone on the bedside table was making a series of notification sounds.
I crawled on my knees and glared at the phone. I can use my phone even in a dream.
With trembling hands, I checked the screen, and Sung Se-han’s message was displayed.
[Tae-kyung, the burgers and pizza are ready.]
[I’ll be leaving soon when the pasta is done.]
[It’s from a famous chef, so the taste is guaranteed. Look forward to it.]
Drip-drop. I wiped away the remaining tears and typed on the keyboard.
[Wow, that sounds delicious! ㅋㅋㅋ]
[Se-han, I’m not hungry, so come slowly.]
[Drive carefully.]
After sending the message, I pulled out a tissue and wiped the tears from the floor. Tears kept falling even as I wiped, and I felt frustrated.
“Fuck, why do tears keep coming out!”
After wiping the floor, I straightened the sheets and went into the bathroom. I stood under the shower for a long time, then sat down again like an idiot.
“Get a grip, Lee Tae-kyung.”
I didn’t just sit there helplessly. I clenched my fists and glared.
“It’s simple. I just have to protect Se-han. If I keep my wits about me, there’s no problem.”
After finishing my shower, I put on the T-shirt and slacks that Sung Se-han had prepared instead of the hospital gown. Then I lay down on the bed on my side, propped up on one arm, and started watching YouTube videos on my phone.
Squeak. Just in time, I heard the sound of the hospital room door opening. I pretended not to hear the quiet footsteps and stared at my phone, then glanced over.
“Oh! You’re here?”
Sung Se-han, who was coming in with shopping bags in both hands, smiled as I jumped up and sat down.
“The clothes are a bit big.”
The size of the short-sleeved T-shirt was large, so the shoulder line was far down, but Sung Se-han seemed to like it. He looked pretty good as he smiled, looking at my shoulders and arms.
If Sung Se-han likes it, I like it too. I shrugged my shoulders and smiled back.
“What’s that?”
Sung Se-han laid out a lot of delicious food on the sofa table and handed me the porridge.
“Eat some abalone porridge first.”
He must want me to eat something soft first because my stomach is empty. I sat on the sofa and obediently picked up a spoon and ate the abalone porridge.
Sung Se-han, who was sitting across from me, came over to my side and wiped my mouth with a napkin.
“Were you hungry?”
“Yeah, a little.”
I ate all the porridge aggressively and immediately picked up a fork. I alternated between eating aglio olio and carbonara, and when I coughed, Se-han handed me a bottle of water.
“Tae-kyung.”
“Yeah.”
I took a sip of water and looked at Sung Se-han. Sung Se-han, who had his elbows on his knees and his chin on his hands, was staring at me.
“You don’t have to force yourself to eat if you don’t have an appetite.”
I tilted my head to the side, following Sung Se-han, and looked into his brown eyes.
“I have to eat well whether I have an appetite or not. My body has to be strong so I can eat well and live well with you for a long, long time. Isn’t that right?”
Sung Se-han reached out to my hair, which wasn’t completely dry yet.
“Our Tae-kyung is worried a lot.”
He smiled as he slowly stroked my hair.
“We’re going to live well for a long, long time, whether our bodies are strong or not….”
“Still, it’s better to be strong and healthy if possible….”
“Tae-kyung.”
Long fingers brushed past my ear and caressed my neck. His long eyes curved, and a sweet smile was directed at me, but I couldn’t smile back.
“I told you. It’s all okay.”
It was hard to hide the fact that I was trembling with fear from Sung Se-han, no matter how hard I tried. When I dropped the fork with trembling hands, Sung Se-han’s strong hands grabbed my shoulders.
“I’m never going to talk about dreams like that again, so don’t be afraid of anything. Just remember this.”
I was grabbed by both shoulders by Sung Se-han and forced to turn. And with a shaking gaze, I met the clearly pouring eyes.
“I will never, ever break up with you, even if I die.”
Even as I looked at the sparkling brown eyes that said he would never let me go no matter what happened, I couldn’t shake the feeling that my heart was sinking.
Could it be that Sung Se-han had seen all the dreams of the accident on January 8th? Is that why he’s saying those things? I didn’t have the courage to confirm it, even with words whose intentions I couldn’t understand.
“Tae-kyung.”
I widened my eyes at the force that was grabbing my shoulders so tightly that they felt like they would break.
“Don’t think about anything else. You just have to think about me.”
The person who grabs me as if to make me unable to look at anything other than himself is Sung Se-han.
I couldn’t help but smile at the guy who was reminding me that he was the reality right in front of me.
“I already am.”
Sung Se-han smiled at my answer. At that moment, something hot seemed to surge up.
My lips and voice weren’t trembling anymore.
“Se-han.”
It’s really strange. How did I end up liking you so much?
How did I end up feeling like I wouldn’t spare anything for you, that I could give you anything?
Even when I came back from the funeral, I was only thinking about protecting Sung Se-han.
But then and now are completely different.
I could feel that now was the time to protect you.
I can also clearly be sure that only I can do it. So, I have to gladly accept this moment. Because you exist in front of me.
“Sung Se-han, you too.”
I have to stop being so dramatic now. To protect Sung Se-han, I didn’t have time to be saying weak things.
“I’m all right, so don’t worry about anything.”
I reached out and brushed Sung Se-han’s hair back and stroked his pretty forehead, and his long eyelashes tickled my palm.
“I can solve everything.”
I promised Sung Se-han once again. That I would protect you.
“So Se-han, you just have to trust me.”
I cupped Sung Se-han’s cheeks and looked into his clear eyes. It was a promise to myself at the same time as it was a way to show Sung Se-han how firm my will was.
“Okay.”
I could feel Sung Se-han smiling with the corners of his mouth raised beyond my palm. Yeah. I have to show a strong side so that Sung Se-han can feel at ease. Let’s not waver from now on.
“I’ll trust only our Tae-kyung.”
My stomach started to churn again at the low voice. I hung on to my smile and nodded my head greatly.
“Yeah.”
With a much lighter heart, I looked at the table.
“Now I have to eat pizza. I’ve been wanting to eat it since earlier.”
Sung Se-han’s eyebrows narrowed as I took out a slice of pizza.
“It must be cold.”
“No. It’s still warm.”
I took a big bite and chewed hard, then turned to look at Sung Se-han. I still couldn’t guess what the eyes staring at me were thinking.
“This is really good.”
“Eat slowly.”
I took the fresh juice that Sung Se-han handed me and took a sip. It must be a cool and delicious juice, but I couldn’t taste anything right now.
“But Se-han.”
“Yeah.”
I put down the juice and put the pizza in my mouth again.
“I don’t think I’ve been watching dramas or movies much these days. I’m not really interested….”
“Is that so?”
“Yeah. I don’t even have time to watch all your videos, so where would I have time to spend on other things?”
Sung Se-han smiled deeply, as if he liked what I said. And soon a large hand stroked my head and passed by.
“Oh, come to think of it.”
I looked at Sung Se-han as if I had remembered something while trying to put the pizza in my mouth.
“It’s been a long time since I watched The Prince of the Rings movie, too?”
“Was it?”
Sung Se-han, who had picked up the napkin again, wiped the sauce off my hand. I felt a little anxious because Sung Se-han seemed to be listening to my words absentmindedly.
“These days, well, I’m not interested in figures either. Even when I go home, I don’t look for figures at all… I’m thinking of getting rid of them all soon.”
At these words, Sung Se-han’s eyes widened slightly, as if he was surprised. I stared at Sung Se-han with the pizza clenched tightly in my hand.
“Se-han, I don’t like figures anymore. If I have time to look at that, I’d rather see your face one more time.”
I can’t reveal the situation I’m in to Sung Se-han. I can’t guarantee what Sung Se-han, who is in confusion because of me, will go through again.
But in order to prevent the accident, there was one thing I had to make sure of. Even if we both get hurt, I have to say this clearly.
“I’m not interested in figures at all anymore. So if you want to give me a gift, give me a bracelet or a necklace.”
This was the best I could do for now.
“Something prettier and better than this.”
With those words, I shook my left wrist with the silver bracelet on it.
“Bracelet, necklace.”
Sung Se-han repeated in his mouth as if entering a command. And then he took my hand and started stroking my wrist slowly with his fingers.