9 – Husband, My Ally

The white ceiling tiles were the first thing I saw.

‘Yeah, they must have changed them.’

Even as my stomach was numb and my chest hurt, a childish sense of relief comforted me.

That was because the white ceiling right in front of me was a kind I had never seen in my twenty-six years, which I had spent in a daze. The unfamiliar scenery eased my pain like a painkiller. The IV drip in my arm was also a color I had never seen before, and there were three types, with even a blood transfusion pack hanging there.

I wondered how much medicine they had poured into my body; I was so out of it. I couldn’t even feel the texture of the sheets touching my fingertips.

Everything was very unfamiliar.

‘I don’t even know anymore….’

That’s what I thought.

‘From this moment on… it’s a story I don’t even know.’

The past, which had already been decided, which I had experienced, suffered, and cried about, was now over. I had thrown myself out of the worst path I had seen, even if I had fallen, rolled, and crawled. So, everything around me from now on was new.

For example, the IV drip in my arm, the smell of disinfectant that always hung in the hospital, and the face of the chief prosecutor looking at me with a worried expression….

“Uh….”

With a dazed mind, I let out a meaningless sound.

The chief prosecutor, standing like a pillar with a dignified appearance, narrowed his brow as if he was very anxious. Behind him, Mother sighed deeply, “Oh dear.”

“You’re awake, Hae-ah.”

Then he called for a nurse. She was so busy and fast that the Doctor found his way into the room before I could even grasp the situation.

The Doctor who appeared with a neat navy shirt collar inside a white coat was the only one, and there was only one nurse. In my life, medical personnel had always been a crowd. The fact that they didn’t swarm in to show off was unfamiliar to me.

“Are you feeling a little more clear-headed? You woke up in just one day.”

Moving his fingers left and right in front of my face, the Doctor asked.

“You have severe damage to your abdomen, especially your spleen.”

Fortunately, there was no bleeding into the abdomen, but he said that he would have to watch the progress for two more days, and that surgery might be necessary if additional rupture occurred. As I listened to the professional terms rattled off by the person in white, I became dizzy. It wasn’t because I was worried. Rather, I was ashamed.

‘Tell me when Father and Mother aren’t here, why now of all times….’

As if it was something to be proud of, that I couldn’t stand being beaten a few times and was taken to the hospital, he was explaining it all in front of them.

“You must have had a lot of pain, so it must have been hard to walk… you also had mild concussion symptoms. Fortunately, you came in time, so there are no major problems with your head.”

Without any tact, the Doctor continued to give a detailed and lengthy explanation to the end.

‘Who’s curious about my condition?’

There was a reason why I kept having twisted and mean thoughts. It was because my whole body was tingling and aching so much that it was making me annoyed for no reason. The vague and dull pain seemed to intensify with every breath. It was at a level where I could only endure it by cursing even the innocent Doctor in my mind.

My brow furrowed on its own, and my eyes strained. As if she noticed me suppressing a hot breath, the nurse handed me a small button next to the bed.

“We’re giving you a pain-free injection, but you’ll still have some pain. Press it whenever it hurts, but limit it to every 10 minutes.”

As soon as he finished explaining, I pressed the button twice in a row. The startled nurse stepped back, and the Doctor sighed and placed his hand on my stomach. Only then did I notice the cast-like thing on my abdomen.

“The painkiller may be too stimulating for the patient’s condition.”

The gentle tone of his whisper was excessively kind. I blinked and looked at her face again. It wasn’t a face I knew. The three letters of the name on the name tag were also unfamiliar. But why was she acting so friendly….

“You don’t know your heat cycle yet, do you?”

‘Ah….’

The answer came quickly. In the Doctor’s eyes, I was not Kang Hae-ah, the youngest son of Hanseong Group, but a recessive Omega patient who had been beaten and passed out.

Following that, she told me a few precautions. She gave me excessive diagnoses, such as telling me to rest completely lying down and to take a wheelchair if I wanted to go to the bathroom. Even after being beaten by Hyung, I walked well on my own two feet and kept my place in the gallery.

‘It’s bearable, this much.’

Thinking that, the pain-free injection button was tightly clenched in my hand.

The Doctor didn’t seem at all flustered by my dissatisfied look, raising my eyes without answering. As if used to it, she slowly unfolded my clenched fist and took out the pain-free injection button. And then she made me feel incredibly dumbfounded. She took my hand gently, with strength.

‘What….’

I just stared, not knowing what to do, and she hung the pain-free injection button on the armrest of the bed and stood up. And then she talked to Mother.

I was a little angry at that attitude. Was it okay for a Doctor to do this? It made me feel like some kind of pitiful victim.

But there were no complaints coming out of my mouth. Mother’s appearance, asking the Doctor about my condition with her back turned, was just like my guardian. I was just staring blankly, captivated by the unfamiliar sight.

…Well, who could I complain to in this condition? I wasn’t in a state to get out of bed anyway. Perhaps because of the medicine that was rushing in late, even my head was becoming dull. It would have been nice if I could think of something else to say, but I couldn’t even do that.

It was amazing how uncomfortable it could be to be in a place with the two people I liked.

‘I slept for a whole day….’

There was almost no sunlight streaming through the hospital room window. When I looked at the clock, the hour hand had just passed the number 3, but it couldn’t be 3 a.m…. The weather outside must be very cloudy. Did it rain last time too? Um… yeah, I think so. Every time I went to the exhibition gallery, raindrops were on my jacket shoulders.

On the opening day, which was now yesterday, I remembered the horrified faces of my parents-in-law that I saw through the car window. Tae-rim-ssi’s profile, slowly saying something while picking out words with bloodstained on his shirt sleeves, and Mother, unable to hide her shocked expression, were vivid in my mind.

Compared to how they looked then, my parents-in-law were now very calm and peaceful. It was as if nothing had happened, and they still seemed to know nothing.

The Doctor left the room, and the sound of the two people having a casual conversation was heard in a soft voice. The chief prosecutor seemed to be approaching me, but

“He still seems a little dazed, don’t bother him for no reason.”

At Mother’s words, only the sound of a clearing throat was heard.

‘Did they know… everything about how I got hurt?’

As I stared at the ceiling tile pattern with hazy eyes, I was scared.

‘Are they regretting… giving their son to someone like me?’

If so, I was afraid that they might ask for a divorce. I knew they weren’t the type to do that. But trust in my parents-in-law and trust in myself were separate issues. How could they be happy that the Dominant Alpha only son, who had been raised with love in a decent family, had been taken by a punching bag from a messed-up family….

It was all exposed; Kang Hae-ah was a fake product that didn’t even reach Cheon Tae-rim’s heels.

Lying blankly in bed, I listened to the conversations like listening to the radio. Father slowly cut the fruit and had a few everyday conversations with Mother. The subject was ‘Tae-rim,’ then ‘that painting yesterday,’ then other lawmakers.

“Um….”

Finally, I opened my mouth. I didn’t know what to say, but the first words that came to mind were ‘I’m sorry for causing you concern’ and ‘Thank you for visiting me.’ But neither of those words came out properly.

My face just turned bright red. It was because of Mother’s hand covering my forehead.

‘Tae-rim-ssi used to do this….’

Mother’s eyes calmly examined my changed complexion. Tae-rim-ssi’s eyes, with no double eyelids and dense eyelashes, from which his cautious nature was revealed, held me. Kang Hae-ah, reflected in those eyes, was pathetic.

“The adults will take care of this.”

Mother said. It was a firm voice I had never heard before.

“Hae-ah, don’t worry and just focus on recovering. If you need anything, make Tae-rim do it.”

‘Ah….’

A surge of heat rose inside me. The hope that I had desperately clung to, that they might not know yet, that they might not have heard everything in detail, was uprooted like a dead weed. They knew everything… it was all exposed.

“Why are you crying? Huh?”

Looking up at the ceiling, I made a sniffling sound. Mother’s hand patted my chest a few times.

“Where did Tae-rim go and not come back…. I’ll call him and bring him, just wait a moment.”

The end of her words, muttering as if upset, trembled. With those words, she closed her mouth tightly and left the room. I had to force myself to resist grabbing her and telling her not to go. The chief prosecutor quietly filled the space that Mother had vacated.

I couldn’t bring myself to face him alone.

“Don’t cry, Hae-ah.”

Chief Prosecutor Cheon, with a firm face, spoke in a kind voice.

“You’re no different from the youngest son of the Cheon family. When you held Tae-rim’s hand and got married, we decided that among ourselves, from now on, Hae-ah is the youngest of our family. Let’s take him in as a late child as if we received a gift.”

The story I was hearing felt like someone else’s business, like a dream. The despair inside me was too murky purple, but their words were too bright and pretty side by side.

This was a big problem. I didn’t know how to have these kinds of conversations, and I wasn’t immune to them.

“Oh dear…, why are you crying again.”

Father’s hand hesitated in the air, touched my stomach, touched the bandage, and quickly fell away. It was the first time I had seen him so flustered and embarrassed, so for some reason, I cried even more.

“I made you cry.”

It was a voice mixed with a weak laugh.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t know….”

After making an effort to speak, I was surprised by my own voice. My throat was completely hoarse, and the thin, leaking voice was very insignificant and weak.

Father wasn’t very surprised by my condition.

“Didn’t Tae-rim tell you those things?”

He just asked that.

After swallowing hard, I nodded, and then I heard a tsk, a sound of disapproval.

“That Tae-rim, he acts strangely in front of you. He has shy corners that I didn’t know about. He doesn’t say things because he’s afraid of burdening you.”

Really, did Tae-rim-ssi act strangely… As I was having such innocent thoughts, tears streamed down.

“Don’t cry.”

As I listened to the gruff, forced comforting sound, I closed my eyes.

‘Tae-rim-ssi acting strangely…, shy Tae-rim-ssi.’

I wanted to remember and engrave the story I heard. Once the subject became Tae-rim-ssi, it sounded very cute and nice.

Tae-rim-ssi, Tae-rim-ssi… As I forced myself to repeat it, my mind became hazy again.

In my dream, I met Hyung.

“If you had been born normal, Mom wouldn’t have died.”

It was a time when our height still didn’t exceed the flower trees in the yard, and the baby fat in our cheeks hadn’t faded yet, but our baby teeth were falling out quickly. In the memories of our childhood, when we were praised for looking so pretty when we stood side by side that we looked like four sisters rather than four siblings, Hyung held a tennis racket, and my cheek had a racket mesh-shaped wound.

I would never forget the scolding I received that day. Even the recollection in my dream was as clear as the latest movie. Because I drew a family picture with Mom using crayons and paints, I was beaten until I cried and peed.

“Ew, disgusting!”

Bursting with anger, Hyung poured a watercolor paint container over my body.

“Can’t even control your pee? Idiot! It’s because you’re like this that Mom abandoned you. Do you know?”

“I don’t know, I don’t know….”

I answered like that while crying, but around that time, I knew everything. If I had been born a Dominant Alpha, Mother would still be alive; there wasn’t a single family member who didn’t know that.

She was a Mother who gave birth to a Dominant Alpha, who was said to be difficult to give birth to even in a bonded relationship between Dominants, as a honeymoon baby. But even so, she fell short of Father’s expectations. It was because the child’s gender was a daughter. Because of that, she had a second child before she even finished postpartum care. They secretly tested the gender, and this time it was a son, but when he was born, he was a recessive alpha.

Before Kang Il-hae, who was named ‘Il’ because he was the first son, even took his first steps, a third child was conceived. The much weakened Mother wanted to stop giving birth to unwanted babies. However, because the fetus’s position was bad and it was difficult to know the gender even with an examination, she was forced to proceed with the delivery, and it was a daughter.

It was a disappointing result for the Kang family, but Mother seemed to love the little older sister very much. You could tell by the fact that she named her Kang Mi-hae, adding ‘Mi,’ meaning pretty daughter.

Father begged Mother, whose days were already short just with postpartum care. According to the shaman that Grandmother met, ‘You must have a fourth child before the 15th of December,’ and ‘You have a particularly outstanding destiny that you can’t have twice in the Kang family,’ or something like that.

That’s how I was made, with a talisman worth hundreds of millions of won placed under the pillow. Praying that I would be the youngest son this time, they even named me Hae-ah, adding ‘Ah.’ My Alpha awakening rate was hitting rock bottom, and my Omega awakening probability was only 77 percent…

“Defective product.”

Hyung called me that.

Looking up at Hyung, who was menacingly swinging a tennis racket, I sniffled. Back then, Hyung’s violence, though ill-tempered, was something I could stop by acting cute. Smiling and playing the fool, hugging the angry Hyung tightly with both arms, and giving him a kiss on the cheek like I did with Father, was usually effective.

“Stupid Kang Hae-ah.”

“Hehe…”

“I wish I had just been born a Dominant Alpha.”

Hyung said those words with a pout. Stained with splotches of paint, I was inwardly surprised.

‘Could it be that Hyung also feels guilty? Does he think he was born wrong, like me?’

Just feeling that sense of kinship in my young heart made my chest flutter.

“Then someone like you wouldn’t have been born.”

I was hit with a sharp word and a small fist, making a thudding sound.

As I tumbled to the ground, I realized. The truth was, Hyung liked my existence. Because that’s how he could feel superior. Because of me, a complete failure, Hyung’s Dominant or recessive tendencies were hidden.

In that sense, I was an indispensable younger brother to Hyung. When the shadow of my eldest sister, a Dominant Alpha as perfect as a painting, crushed Hyung’s pride, he needed a punching bag to spit at and slap.

After venting his anger, Hyung would disappear, and the cleanup was my responsibility. I took off my urine-soaked pants and used them as a rag to wipe the wet floor. Wriggling across the floor like a tadpole, I picked up the sketchbook. The imaginary mother I had drawn with a smiling face was smeared with paint and unrecognizable.

I put my lips to the mother in the picture and blew on it, “Hoo,” “Hoo.”

And then I woke up.

‘Just a dog dream…’

With my eyes closed, I just let out a long breath. If I’m going to have a dog dream, wouldn’t it be nice if it was a dream about the real dog, Do-jin?

Unable to shake off the unpleasant feeling, I balled my fist inside the blanket,

“It’s Il-hae’s fault, Chairman.”

A clear voice pierced my ear.

The consciousness that had sunk below sleep like sediment jolted awake. But I still couldn’t open my eyes. It was because of the address “Chairman,” and because the voice seemed to belong to my sister.

“Isn’t it a daily occurrence for him to beat Hae-ah like he’s catching a rat? Why are you surprised? It’s not like you didn’t know.”

From a young age, my eldest and youngest sisters had very similar voices. Their personalities were also similar, and even their dressing styles were alike, so there were many times when I could only distinguish them by looking closely and listening carefully.

There was only one easy way to tell apart the sisters, who were as alike as twins and always affectionately stuck together. It was none other than their attitude towards Chairman Kang Jun-il, Father. If she called him ‘Father’ and complied with ‘Yes,’ it was my youngest sister, Kang Mi-hae, and if she used the honorific ‘Chairman’ but still said everything she wanted to say, it was my eldest sister, Kang Hae-in.

“What’s the matter with Il-hae’s nose being broken?”

So, this voice is my eldest sister.

“He saw his brother-in-law assaulting his mate, how could his eyes not flip? Kang Il-hae should be grateful he’s not dead.”

A question mark popped up in my mind, bewildered because I had missed the timing to get up.

Firstly, it was strange that my cold eldest sister, who had never given her heart to anyone in the world except my youngest sister, was taking my and Tae-rim-ssi’s side. She usually called him ‘CEO Cheon’ with utmost respect, but it was also bewildering that she was so naturally referring to him as her brother-in-law.

Secondly, the lie mixed in with that claim was entirely questionable.

“What are you talking about, Kang Hae-in.”

Chairman also pointed that out.

‘Yeah, what the hell are you talking about…’

I repeated the same question in my mind, and

“It’s exactly as I said.”

My sister replied nonchalantly.

“Even if Il-hae had been beaten to death, my brother-in-law would be innocent.”

As if lost in a maze, the threads in my head became tangled. As I squinted slightly and carefully observed, I saw Father standing by the window with his hands behind his back, and my sister watching me while rubbing the tips of her index finger and thumb. At that moment, our eyes met, but my sister didn’t say anything to me.

However,

“Is it a crime in this day and age to hit an Alpha who touched someone who is knotting? Especially since he beat up a Dominant Alpha’s mate in plain sight. Who kicks someone else’s Omega’s belly until it bursts?”

She lied very confidently in a clear, well-pronounced voice. I’ve felt it before, but my sister’s voice was very good.

“My brother-in-law and Hae-ah are mated. Bonded, to each other. We don’t know when a child might be conceived.”

Anything that came out of my sister’s mouth had a dramatic flair.

At the words ‘mated,’ Father’s head turned towards me. Leaning my head against the pillow, I pretended to be asleep and held my breath. I felt a stinging sensation on my skin, as if physical force was exerted in the gaze looking down at me. Cold sweat broke out below my waist.

Fortunately, Father didn’t bother to wake me up. I was relieved that he didn’t even ask if it was true. He didn’t say anything more and just remained silent.

After enduring about 10 minutes in the heavy silence, I heard the sound of the hospital room door opening. My mother-in-law, who was always kind and friendly, greeted him with a somewhat subdued voice,

“You’ve arrived, In-law.”

My father-in-law’s voice followed slowly, but I couldn’t hear exactly what was being said.

‘I thought so…’

I thought that Chairman, who was very conscious of people’s gazes, had willingly come to visit me in the hospital in broad daylight.

He was the Chairman who always knew that Hyung was unilaterally beating me, but always just scolded us with ‘Don’t fight.’ There was only one time he scolded Hyung, and that was because he had hit my face, which was about to go out to receive a big award.

That was our Father. The Chairman, who had a purpose behind every word and action. The reason he came to visit me today was to meet the chief prosecutor, not me.

The Chairman’s voice, asking for a brief conversation, sounded so kind that I wondered if it was really the Kang Jun-il of the world. The chief prosecutor politely accepted Father’s request. After hearing the sound of the door closing after the two adults left, and not hearing any other sounds, I thought that my mother-in-law had also left.

Only then,

“Why did you lie like that, Sister…”

I opened my mouth.

“Yeah. Did you sleep well.”

My eldest sister’s reaction was nonchalant.

Then she plopped down on the sofa next to the bed and crossed her legs. She was wearing white sneakers under her suit pants. It seemed that she still wore shoes only during commuting hours and carried sneakers in the passenger seat of her car.

“I was helping you, so that your husband could take care of his precious body.”

While taking out her cell phone to check a text message or something, my eldest sister replied casually. I thought I heard a small ‘click’ of the shutter, but my sister’s expression was so calm that I wondered if I had heard a hallucination.

Dismayed and dumbfounded, a hollow laugh escaped from between my teeth.

“What are you doing, Sister… Why did you lie? Tae-rim-ssi and I didn’t do knotting or anything…”

Then, thump, my sister’s cell phone landed on the edge of my bed. Her indifferent eyes stared at my face, and I just stared back.

Just looking at Il-hae hyung and my relationship, I knew that just because we were family from the same womb didn’t mean we would be harmonious. My eldest sister and I were exactly like that. I was closer to Hye-rim, who I had only attended graduate school with for two years, than to my eldest sister.

I knew myself well. The person named Kang Hae-ah was only an attractive human being when met briefly outside. Even I, who had been playing the role of a bouncy genius, a cheerful artist, and an innocent son my whole life, couldn’t be good 24 hours a day. It was the same when I first married Tae-rim-ssi. Even while saying it was okay to the introduction of a CEO who often went on business trips,

‘If we meet occasionally, he’ll get less tired of me, right?’

I had thought cheerfully.

So, Hye-rim, who I only met occasionally when I wanted to, liked me. I could easily hear things like, ‘Hae-ah, you’re such a wonderful person,’ ‘I want to be like you too.’ But not my eldest sister.

To my eldest sister, I was, at best, a ten-year-old kid. Kang Hae-ah, a pathetic younger brother who cried because he didn’t want to go to study abroad, cried because he didn’t want to be scolded, and shed tears because he was beaten by Il-hae hyung.

‘Stop crying!’

My eldest sister, who used to scold me like that, was in my memory. At those times, my sister’s expression was very cold and her tone was filled with annoyance. It was because of the neurosis that I had given her, as I would cry for hours at a time once I started crying, and sometimes even faint after crying for two days straight.

‘Kang Hae-ah, no matter how good you are at anything, you’ll be hated if you cry. Smile. Even if you’re not good at anything, just smile. You have the same smiling face as Mom. Everyone will like you if you just smile.’

When she grabbed my shoulders and advised me, did my sister know? That it would become my way of survival. That it was a technique to endure the violence that came and went like the seasons.

Violence was summer to me. A summer that came back periodically when I was about to forget it, scorching me.

From the age of twelve or so, even if I was sick, it didn’t seem like a big deal. Looking back, I could have been beaten to death at any time, anywhere. The fact that my life had continued to the age of thirty-two was just because I was lucky. But it was strange that it was taken for granted.

Hyung knew how to hit me without making it obvious… Si Eun-cheol subtly killed my soul. …And although I hated to put them in parallel with their names, Tae-rim-ssi was desperately busy pulling me up every time violence passed.

So dulled, I forgot that I didn’t have to go through the same pain. That I didn’t have to obey Hyung, that there was no reason to just be beaten by Si Eun-cheol, that I didn’t have to flatter Chairman and cater to his whims, and that I didn’t have to hold onto Teacher Im as if he were a lifeline.

But I was me. Even if I turned back time, I was… I was me.

Foolish, idiotic Kang Hae-ah. Even after learning through death that no one would understand my heart no matter how much I fussed and worried alone, I couldn’t get rid of my old-fashioned personality. It seemed that Father’s orders, that everyone had to like me, that I shouldn’t be mean to anyone, and that I should only show them the good side they wanted, had now become me.

So I was curious.

‘Right now… does Sister know?’

That I had someone on my side on the day I couldn’t stand it and fell out.

When my thoughts reached that point, it was as if a small air hole had been drilled in my stuffy heart. I didn’t bother to express that joy. It was partly because of the infantile feeling of being afraid of being taken away if I told anyone, and partly because the three-year age gap between my eldest sister and me was more enormous than the thirteen-year age gap between others. So even now, at the age of thirty-two, imbued in the shell of twenty-six, I found my sister difficult.

“Our Chairman may pretend to be fine on the outside, but his insides are very twisted.”

Who could treat my sister comfortably and carelessly? There wasn’t a single smile on her face as she stated that.

“Hae-ah, you know too, he cherishes me, a Dominant Alpha, more than you, who was a Beta in the past, but he likes Kang Il-hae, a son, more than me, a daughter.”

Her tone, stating the facts calmly, was sharp.

“…Do you know what Chairman would like more than that? Grandchildren, which single daughters can’t give birth to.”

“……”

“Even now, look. Even though Il-hae kicked your belly like that, the old man didn’t even show any surprise, but how about that belly being a belly that will have a baby. Your husband can crush the eldest son’s nose and he won’t say anything.”

“…Hyung’s nose is crushed?”

“Good for him, then. He can get plastic surgery while he’s at it.”

I was prepared that everything from now on would be new and unfamiliar. But I had never expected such an event. I had never even imagined having a long conversation with my eldest sister, or that my sister would speak to me in a slightly kind voice.

I felt like I was getting hives from the awkward kindness.

“Why are you taking my side, all of a sudden…”

As I muttered that, my sister also closed her mouth. The brief silence made me feel more comfortable. The sound of rain hitting the window, along with the rough wind, repeated the cycle of becoming fierce and then calming down a couple of times.

“I don’t regret the past. When you were crawling around, it was Mi-hae, that Kang Il-hae was laying his hands on.”

I needed time to understand my youngest sister’s name because it was in such an unfamiliar sentence. Then,

‘I see…’

Even the surprise quickly faded.

‘That’s probably right.’

Given Hyung’s personality, it was unlikely that his violence was limited to me. It was obvious if I thought about it, but until now, I didn’t even have the time to think about it… I had never deeply considered the reason why Hyung hated me. I just thought that everything was ‘just’ because of me. Because Mom died because of me, because Hyung was angry because of me, that everything was because of me.

I pressed the button for the painkiller once.

Silence fell again between my eldest sister and me.

Just as the medicine was taking effect,

“But I’m sorry.”

My sister said abruptly. It was so forceful that it sounded almost like a shout.

Surprised, I stared at her with wide eyes, and my sister added.

“I mean, for just leaving you alone knowing you were getting beaten.”

“Ah, uh…”

“So don’t text me. And stop sending useless gifts. …It’s annoying because I’m worried.”

“Uh…”

I couldn’t find any other reply than to trail off like that. I was just dazed. It was the first time I had heard a family member say they were sorry, but I didn’t feel particularly good or bad. Since I had never imagined it in the first place, I didn’t even know what kind of emotion should arise.

So I smiled. After blinking blankly, I just smiled.

My eldest sister’s eyes, which were looking at me, were clear and then distorted. With a frown on her forehead, there was a resentful energy in the sigh my sister let out.

“It’s annoying.”

Then my sister turned her head. Leaning back on the sofa and looking at the clock, she adjusted her posture as if she was going to stay longer.

“But where did CEO Cheon go and not come back like this. Until a little while ago… No, never mind. Well, he’ll come when it’s time.”

At those words, I pondered.

‘I guess… he’s not coming because he doesn’t want to see this mess…’

I kept the answer to myself.

Late in the evening, darkness fell in the hospital room. After persuading my mother-in-law, who said she would stay with me all night, to go back, getting used to my eldest sister’s ambiguous kindness, and accepting the gifts that Secretary Hwang had brought without complaint, it was night.

With only a mood light on in the darkness, I slowly turned the handle next to the bed. I wanted to sit up with the bed mattress at a right angle, but it was difficult because I couldn’t put strength in my arms. In the end, the mattress supporting my back became an ambiguous shape that was neither standing nor lying down. Just touching it like that made my stomach and rib cage throb with pain.

Pressing the button for the painkiller became a habit in just one day. While waiting for the medicine to take effect, I propped the pillow behind my back.

And I looked at the closed door. It was too late for anyone to visit, but there was someone who would come.

A small expectation made even the short wait feel long. When my eyes became accustomed to the darkness and even the sound of footsteps passing through the hallway became loud, the sound of someone walking like a soldier, clomping, clomping, pierced my ears. I adjusted my sitting position and straightened the crumpled blanket on my lap.

Finally, the hospital room door opened quietly. In the hospital room piled with the fruit that my mother-in-law had brought, the essay books that my eldest sister had given me, and the bundle of gifts from Father that Secretary Hwang had delivered, the last guest to arrive was empty-handed.

“……”

Without a word, I looked at the figure in the darkness. The light from the hallway that had briefly seeped in was blocked as the door closed behind him. Because of the white backlight reflected by the window’s curtains, I couldn’t see his expression well. I quietly raised my arm towards him. I waited for him to come closer, raising both arms high and spreading them open.

Slowly, he walked towards me, passing through the darkness that occupied the room of about four or five pyeong. As he came closer to the bed, the light from the mood light touched his chin, the bridge of his nose, and soon his entire face.

A neat upper body was tilted into my breath-held embrace. From his stiff body came the scent of pheromones that felt particularly fierce, and the strong smell of rain. The shoulders and waist of his black jacket were wet with rain. Compared to me, who was hugging him tightly with both arms, he was like a wooden statue. He only put one hand on my back and didn’t hug me tightly at all.

“Tae-rim-ssi.”

With my chin on his shoulder, I sorted out what I wanted to say. I wanted to say I was sorry, I wanted to soothe him by asking if he was very surprised, and I wanted to complain that he had waited all day but why didn’t he come sooner. But no words came out of my mouth.

I pressed my face against his wet shoulder until my cheek was flattened. With both hands, I wrapped around his shoulder blades as if to prevent him from flying away.

“Tae-rim-ssi….”

Tae-rim-ssi’s body, cold from the rain, warmed up just a little, slowly.

“Tae-rim-ssi, are you still angry?”

I asked quietly, and

“No.”

A surprisingly low voice burst out.

“I’ve never been angry with you.”

Soon, his hand touched my cheek. I flinched at the icy temperature of his palm. I quickly grabbed his hand as he tried to pull away from me a beat too late.

“Why is your hand so cold? Where have you been? And in the rain….”

His large hand, which was always two degrees warmer than mine, felt stiff and even hard today. I was about to hold it tightly with both hands and put it in the blanket when I noticed a pink line on the edge of his hand. I wondered if something was on it, but then I noticed the stitched-up wound and a clear bandage.

“Why….”

There were marks where the skin had been peeled off each of his prominent knuckles, and they were bruised red. Surprised, I looked up and found Tae-rim-ssi’s face very close to mine.

He leaned in deeply toward me,

“…I had some things to take care of.”

He said.

I carefully unfolded his injured hand, as if the pain would be transferred just by looking at it. I tried to recall what happened at the gallery warehouse, but I couldn’t remember what Tae-rim-ssi had been like that day, or how he had injured his hand so badly. I didn’t realize it at the time, but I wondered if I had fainted for a moment.

Feeling upset, I just held his bruised hand,

“Hae-ah.”

Tae-rim-ssi called me.

His hoarse voice was half a tone lower than usual. I didn’t know what he was going to say, so I delayed my answer. After a long time,

“Yes.”

I swallowed hard, but this time it was Tae-rim-ssi’s turn to be silent.

His wavering Adam’s apple and the lips that repeatedly opened and closed comforted me. I wasn’t the only one who was worried about what kind of expression I should make when we talked face to face, what he would say to me, and what I should say to him.

After a long hesitation, Tae-rim-ssi’s question was rather anticlimactic.

“Does it still… hurt?”

His gaze fell on my stomach. Through the gap in the open patient gown, I could see the stiff half-cast bandage. Thanks to that, my stomach was bigger and flatter than usual.

“No, it doesn’t hurt anymore. Not at all. I took my medicine, too….”

I mumbled and thumped the cast on purpose. I was trying to act brave as I tapped it with my hand, but he grabbed both of my hands. A small sigh escaped from his nose.

Well, I was the one who had three IV drips and took up a hospital room in such a fuss. My ears were burning because I had told such an obvious lie.

Since I was already embarrassed, there was something I wanted to ask.

“Tae-rim-ssi, do you remember what I said…?”

To my courageous question,

“Yes.”

The answer came back quickly.

“…Then why don’t you answer?”

“Answer what?”

“I… said I liked you.”

“I said I liked you first.”

The pounding of my heart, which had been fluttering with tension, suddenly lightened. I could feel my pulse racing up my neck.

I was no longer afraid of Tae-rim-ssi’s stern face. The man who had beaten my Hyung so badly that he had broken his nose was now glaring at me like a sulky child.

“You pretended to be asleep and didn’t even listen.”

I thought to myself that this was what they meant by “give a peck and get a bushel.” Tae-rim-ssi was right. Tae-rim-ssi was the one who confessed first that he liked… me.

“…Was it obvious?”

I didn’t even know it, and I pretended to sleep for three hours on the way from Ulsan to Seoul, without even opening my eyes.

“Of course it was….”

A weak laugh was mixed in at the end of his words.

Both he and I were blushing as we remained still, in an ambiguous position where we were neither hugging nor being hugged. I lowered my head in embarrassment and saw his legs sitting on the edge of the bed. The rain stains remained as darker circles on his black pants.

“Tae-rim-ssi, are you… going to stay here tonight?”

I raised my head and asked,

“Yes.”

His firm nose touched the tip of my nose.

It was only when I lifted my chin and opened my lips that I realized the hidden expectation that I had been waiting for a kiss all along. Tae-rim-ssi smiled slightly with his lips slightly parted as if about to touch. His eyes curved softly and captured my flushed face, and

“N…o.”

The lips that were about to make some excuse were blocked.

“……”

The tender kiss had a strangely bitter taste. The touch of his parched lips was rougher than usual. On the other hand, his tongue, which pushed into my mouth, was as big and soft as ever. My mouth opened involuntarily and my eyes closed softly as I heard the sound of my heart boiling.

Tae-rim-ssi climbed on top of me, who had collapsed onto the bed from exhaustion. The sounds of pecking kisses were cute, but soon became lewd as we sucked on each other’s tongues and lips with a squelching sound. When he exhaled hot air, Tae-rim-ssi’s hand, which was holding my cheek, was now hot.

“Home….”

I said as our lips parted for a moment.

“I want to go home…. I want to see Do-jin, too… Our home….”

Then the pecking kisses,

“Tomorrow.”

Peck,

“Let’s go as soon as the sun rises.”

Continued one after another.

One tender kiss made me fall apart, and Tae-rim-ssi seemed to have regained his energy. With a more flushed face than before, he put his hands under my waist and below my thighs. My exhausted body was lifted up and moved to the right side of the bed, closer to the IV drip. My eyes widened as my body fell onto the blanket.

‘How many kilograms can Tae-rim-ssi lift if he’s determined to do it?’

Cheon Tae-rim, who had skillfully made a place to lie down, took off his jacket. The fatigue of the whole day was on his shirt. I felt strangely upset by something like a dark coffee stain on the sleeve of his gray dress shirt.

Soon, Tae-rim-ssi carefully reached out his hand. His arm burrowed under my head and soon took the place of the pillow. I could only laugh awkwardly at the treatment I was receiving for the first time in my life.

“Are you going to give me a pillow with your arm?”

I asked, and

“What else would it be?”

He looked at me and lay on his side.

The hospital bed, which had felt big enough for one person to lie on, was now full with Cheon Tae-rim in it. I was frustrated that I couldn’t hug him because the IV line was in the way. I put my cheek against his hard arm and lay down with difficulty, looking at each other, and his two eyes looking at me were warm. Warm…, it was good because it was warm.

“I’m sorry.”

Only then did I have a little courage. Courage to tell him about my shortcomings and ask for forgiveness, sprouted in my damp heart.

“I’m sorry for surprising you, Tae-rim-ssi…. And… I’m sorry for pretending I didn’t hear what you said, and for not saying what I should have said and hiding it.”

Tae-rim-ssi’s eyes looking at me were like looking at a child, and on the other hand, like looking at a monster.

“I wanted to be a good husband to you, Tae-rim-ssi… but I’m so sorry I couldn’t….”

“Hae-ah.”

“The neck, necklace…. The necklace Tae-rim-ssi gave me… I lost it. I’m sorry.”

“Hae-ah….”

I was afraid to check his expression, so I closed my eyes.

“I’m sorry.”

I apologized again, and my nose tingled. Don’t cry, if I show tears here, I’ll become too pathetic… With that thought, I swallowed the tears that were welling up. As I breathed out hot air, the emotions that had been stuck in my chest were released and I could breathe.

“It’s okay.”

Tae-rim-ssi, who had been silent for a long time, said.

“Everything is okay.”

He touched my cheek. His slow fingers passed over my closed eyelids and gently rubbed my eyebrows along the grain. I also felt something cold and small touching the bridge of my nose.

I opened my eyes at the unfamiliar sensation and saw a blurry gold line first because it was placed too close.

“Oh.”

Surprised, I cried out and grabbed his hand. The amethyst necklace was spread out in front of my nose. It was hanging on Tae-rim-ssi’s finger.

“How did you….”

I was so surprised and happy that my voice came out like a moan. I’m sure Hyung, took it away…. Or maybe it was dropped in that room. I couldn’t tell which one was my delusion.

However, the important thing was that Tae-rim-ssi had returned the necklace that I had missed so much to me. Carefully putting it around my neck and carefully fastening the small hook… That was all that mattered to me. At that moment, I couldn’t tell the difference between the twenty-eight-year-old Cheon Tae-rim and the thirty-four-year-old Cheon Tae-rim. I had the delusion that the necklace he had taken away on the day he truly began to hate me was now being returned by him.

Because of that, I was overwhelmed with great emotion. Uncontrollable emotions burst out in my head. The tears I had been holding back trickled down. I buried my upper body in Tae-rim-ssi’s arms, pulling the IV line, as if a little surprised.

The humid emotion softened my tongue. The tension was released and the moment my head was filled with flower gardens, I became chatty.

“I’m so happy, thank you. My necklace….”

“……”

“I thought I lost it… I was so sad that I wouldn’t be able to find it again, thank you so much.”

“…Okay.”

Tae-rim-ssi’s answer sounded perfunctory. His eyes, which were looking around my eyes, continued one after another. But I became indifferent. Regardless of his reaction of looking around in embarrassment, I started to smile and talk.

“You know, when I was in Florence, I exhibited under a pseudonym. I rented a gallery with the friends I lived with there…, and I hung all the paintings I had worked on for months under fake names.”

I was so relaxed that I confessed old things while holding the necklace with both hands and kissing it.

“…Most of the things piled up in the annex are those kinds of paintings. I can’t hang them in any gallery under my name…. They’re my paintings and my babies, but my things shouldn’t be like that.”

At the moment when the stimulating emotions were jumping up and down so much that my insides were numb, I felt great. Tae-rim-ssi, compared to me, had a bewildered face.

“The Chairman will be angry. Hyung will hate it, too…, and my sisters will look at me pitifully, saying why am I so weak. People will… be disappointed. Kang Hae-ah shouldn’t be like that. Kang Hae-ah is a likable person.”

Tae-rim-ssi, to my confession, didn’t concentrate on me, annoyingly. He looked up at the IV line and scanned the branches of the line, then suddenly reached out his right arm and wrapped it around my waist. The faint foreign substance that had been under the hard cast finally disappeared.

After checking the painkiller button, Tae-rim-ssi groaned softly. When he scratched it up with his short fingernails, the button that had been pressed down tightly popped out.

“I guess… that’s why I’ve been having a hard time lately. I have to be Kang Hae-ah, but it’s not working out.”

“Haa…, Hae-ah. You’re just saying that because of the medicine….”

“Are you listening to me?”

I grabbed Cheon Tae-rim-ssi’s cheeks, who kept ignoring me. When I pinched and pulled his cheeks with both hands, his stern and haughty face froze in surprise.

“Anytime, huh? You’re always thinking about something else. Whenever something happens, huh? You always throw a punch first. You’re so mean, Cheon Tae-rim-ssi.”

I stretched out his cheeks with his eyes widened.

“I’ll let you off because you’re cute.”

Then I laughed. While laughing so hard that my shoulders shook,

“I like you, Tae-rim-ssi.”

I confessed, and

“I like you….”

I confessed again.

I felt like my whole body was as light as a feather. Cheon Tae-rim in front of me was very cute, and there were no more heavy emotions left in my heart like a rock. My body and mind were lightened as if I was in a state of zero gravity, so I laughed.

“I like you.”

Then I buried my face in his chest. I could feel Tae-rim-ssi’s firm and large chest muscles twitching on their own. With a slightly hurried hand, Tae-rim-ssi repeatedly pressed the nurse call button.

“Why are you doing that? I want to be alone with you.”

My two hands stuck to his chest. As I kneaded his firm muscles, Tae-rim-ssi’s eyes looking at me were wider than ever. It seemed that no one had ever touched his sexy body like this before.

I felt proud, as if I had become a pioneer. I put my mouth on the center of his chest, leaving saliva on his shirt, and then bit his right chest hard. His groan, as if surprised, was mixed with a moan.

“…I’m going crazy, really.”

Holding my chin with one hand, Tae-rim-ssi muttered. From his outer skeleton to his soul, he was so perfect that his face, which had never been swayed by anyone else in his life, was as red as a carrot.

I became very happy with that reaction. Smiling like a prankster, I touched his thighs with my hands. His large penis was neatly stored on his left thigh. As I squeezed and touched it as if to estimate its shape, the hot flesh swelled and became so taut that it seemed like his pants would tear.

A strong body scent wafted from his moving center. I felt thirsty.

“Hae-ah, don’t.”

Tae-rim-ssi was very busy pressing my shoulders on the sheet, pressing the nurse call button again, and trying to stop my bad hands.

“Stop. Stop touching me.”

“Why?”

“…Not now.”

“Why?”

I felt sorry for his male part that wanted to come out of his pants. I could take it out and set it free, but Tae-rim-ssi kept saying “no.”

“Why…. Just once.”

His pants were difficult to take off because they were fastened with a belt, but my clothes were different. When I pulled down my loose patient pants, Tae-rim-ssi’s breath became even hotter. His urgent hand tightly grabbed and held onto the waistband of my pants.

“Let’s just sleep, Hae-ah. Be good…. Let’s just hold hands and sleep.”

The voice that was coaxing me was exactly the tone he used to coax Do-jin when he wanted a snack.

Because of that, I became twisted. He was lying in the same bed, giving me a pillow with his arm, kissing me, and showing me his handsome body… His thing hidden between his legs was already big and it was all obvious, but he kept telling me not to do it.

“Why are you holding hands if you’re not going to have sex?”

I sneered because I felt so wronged, and

“You’re really drunk….”

Tae-rim-ssi’s sigh deepened even more. His face, which was already red, looked like he had lived two or three years longer. I looked at the blood vessels rising on his handsome forehead, and then buried my face in his chest again.

“I’m not doing this because I’m drunk.”

And I thought.

“I’m always like this…. I’m always holding back from wanting to have sex.”

“……”

“…Did I say that out loud just now?”

“N…, no.”

Tae-rim-ssi’s broad chest was pounding busily. Ugh, just stay still. The sound of his heart was so loud that I felt like my head was shaking. I tapped his forehead lightly to scold his chest, which was jumping around on its own.

“……”

Then Tae-rim-ssi reached out and hugged my head. I buried my face in his warm arms and broad chest, and I thought I didn’t need a separate house.

“Hand….”

Let’s hold hands and sleep… With those words, I fell into a deep sleep.

It was a pity that I couldn’t understand the conversations between the adults. If I could only listen to and learn about what kind of negotiations took place between the Chairman and the Chief Prosecutor, I would make that comeback the motto of my life. By the time I was discharged from the hospital, the situation, which had seemed so complicated, had been completely resolved without either the Chairman or the Chief Prosecutor blushing.

I didn’t hear any news that troubled me about Hyung. The Chairman didn’t say anything about my declaration that I would quit my life as an artist. I expected at least Chief Park, if not Teacher Im, to come and give me a long persuasion, but I was pleasantly mistaken.

My world returned to normal as if there had been no fights or seeds of unhappiness. By the time I packed my things from the hospital and got out of the car that Tae-rim-ssi had driven me in, the only thing that ran to me was Do-jin, who was crying so hard that he was even shedding tears.

No one explained to me what had happened during the past four days that I had been lying in the hospital reading books. I was worried that bad news would hit me like a bomb at any moment, but the only news that came was a report that my solo exhibition paintings had been sold out.

After that, a quick change surprised me. I thought I had fallen out of the established framework as an artist, but Chairman Kang had found a place that even I could fit in and put me back in place. He would have Driver Oh deliver letters, business cards, and proposals.

The Chairman’s handwritten letter was neat and clean without any frills. Only the necessary words were written, and not a single grain of messy emotions was buried in it. I thought that the few bills of pocket money enclosed were his sincerity, rather than an apology saying he was sorry and the affectionate words “my son.”

I stared at the trash can for a long time with the letter in my hand, but I couldn’t throw it away.

The business card of the new publicist replacing Manager Park made me bitter. But the proposal itself was interesting. It contained an offer to collaborate with a fashion brand next spring.

Could there be a more verbose way of saying, “I’ve broken my brush, but I’ll keep doing business”? Frankly, it was funny.

So, did I hate it? Not really. Why would I hate it when everyone was telling me, “Kang Hae-ah isn’t dead yet”? I liked the attention pouring in, and I liked playing around, postponing answers.

‘Was there ever a time when I just… relaxed… and rested like this?’

When I lay sprawled on the sofa with Do-jin on my stomach, Tae-rim-ssi was summoned with a low sigh.

“How many times have I told you not to press on your stomach?”

He moved Do-jin to the cushion, nagging in a pleasant tone. Then Do-jin would growl softly and jump back onto the sofa, and Tae-rim-ssi would subdue him with a single ‘tsk’. Knowing my uncomfortable condition, Do-jin liked to wrap his body around me, and Tae-rim-ssi was busy trying to stop him. As I spent a peaceful weekend like a dream, I felt incredibly bewildered.

On Monday, I organized Tae-rim-ssi’s study. Inside the safe, which I opened out of curiosity, I didn’t see the crisp diary or the blank postcards. Instead, an unfamiliar document in a white envelope greeted me. I carefully took it out and skimmed the first page, which turned out to be a copy of a restraining order.

It took me a long time to understand my name written as the victim and Kang Il-hae’s three letters processed as the perpetrator. The content of the document itself was simple. Il-hae hyung was not allowed to come to see me, and even communication by text or phone was prohibited.

Accepting that neat and clear news, however, was not easy.

‘Why didn’t he tell me? I thought it was just going to pass quietly… No, what if this messes up the contract with Han-seong!’

At first, I was angry at Tae-rim-ssi for no reason.

‘Did the Chairman allow this? How on earth did the negotiations go…’

In the afternoon, I was anxious with sharp worries,

‘So, this was possible.’

In the evening, I felt empty.

Eventually, when Tae-rim-ssi returned from work, I couldn’t say anything. The emotions that had shaken me up all day long had all left like the wind that had filled a balloon, leaving only a bitter realization in its place.

‘So, this is what it’s like. To be protected…’

So, I decided to pretend not to know and forget. Whether it was the document hidden in the safe or the slow-healing scratch on Tae-rim-ssi’s hand, I decided to leave only the good words he told me and erase everything else.

Acting like a fool like that was inevitably uncomfortable. On the one hand, I also felt the pressure that I should protect him…

But undeniably, I enjoyed today. When I greeted Tae-rim-ssi with a comfortable face, pretending not to have heard any news… I was happy.

It was good, thinking about him stepping up to protect me. It was very joyful to see the affectionate affection seeping into his expression as he looked at me.

His hand, which had returned from work and put down his bag, reached out to me,

“What did you do today?”

Ruffling my hair as I lazed around.

And I fought with Cheon Tae-rim. It was the first argument I had in my second life. We had exchanged harsh words and unpleasantries before, or rather, we had done so often… but a ‘fight’ was a separate matter. A one-sided emotional drain where one person was angry and the other groveled in fear could not be called a fight.

The real meaning of a fight was,

“I’m going.”

“I told you, you can’t.”

“Oh, I’m fine, really.”

Exchanging each other’s temperaments back and forth.

“I’m going with you. I’ll take care of my condition, so don’t worry, Tae-rim-ssi.”

Tae-rim-ssi looked down at my stubborn face as if he was dumbfounded. I felt a fire rising inside me at the sight of him clicking his tongue and saying ‘huh’.

I think I now know why young children who are not good at expressing their emotions scream and stomp their feet when they are angry. Seeing Cheon Tae-rim’s face, which didn’t budge at my very rational and desperate words, even I,

‘Ah, I’m going, I’m going with you!’

I wanted to scream and stomp my feet.

Today, August 10th, was a special day completely different from August 9th and August 11th. It was a day of great history, marked with six stars on my red ‘Future Journal’, a night when Tae-rim-ssi was in a better mood than usual and he rarely smiled at me, a night when AOM won the Grand Prize for Technological Innovation and a large party was held with many business people gathering.

So, my condition was not a problem at all.

That was the reason I came back to the past in the first place. I don’t know if the one who picked up my life and planted it in the field I had passed was a god or some being in the universe… but at least I believed this.

I, Kang Hae-ah, came back to prevent the tragedies that would befall Tae-rim-ssi and my life and to unravel a new thread of life. Finally, when ‘Kang Hae-ah’ is no longer a scammer, a freeloader, or a pathetic Beta, on that day, Tae-rim-ssi’s side will be suitable for me, and no one will laugh at me.

‘I want to go with you…’

So, I wanted to be confirmed. On August 10th in the past, I didn’t know anything about Tae-rim-ssi’s work and didn’t have the courage to follow him, so I just stayed home, but now it was different. I had memorized the list of business people related to AOM, and even knew all the trends of later events that they didn’t know.

But Cheon Tae-rim kept suppressing me. He had the tie I had chosen hanging on his shirt collar, but he refused, saying he couldn’t take me with him.

“Why can’t I, you keep saying.”

I pretended not to know the reason and insisted. Tae-rim-ssi’s eyes looked tired as they held me. ‘It hasn’t even been four days since you were discharged from the hospital’, his black eyes seemed to be saying.

“I’m really okay.”

My body was really okay. The bruises on my arms and stomach had spread and flowed down a lot, so anyone who saw them would scream, but when I wore clothes, it didn’t show at all. And were those ordinary clothes? I drew five big stars on the calendar and said I would definitely wear them on this day, and I had a suit made of thin, light material with a formal design.

So, I was okay. I wasn’t going to run a marathon at the party, and I wasn’t going to drink heavily. Just being by Tae-rim-ssi’s side in his happy moments, that was all I wanted. I wanted to enjoy the fact that Kang Hae-ah had deeply entered his life. I hoped that when Tae-rim-ssi recalled the good days in the future, I would be with him in his memory.

‘That’s all I want…’

When the tenth rejection came, worrying about my condition, I was exhausted. I was so frustrated, empty, and despondent that my shoulders drooped. My hair, which I had styled so carefully, and the suit I had taken out, all seemed ridiculous.

“…….”

I turned my back on Tae-rim-ssi, who was standing at the door. As I trudged to the living room and sat down on the sofa, I had the bad illusion that nothing had changed.

‘It was like this before…’

It was a summer night when I couldn’t give a reason to follow Tae-rim-ssi, who said he would go alone, and ended up sitting on the sofa and drinking wine. This time, I didn’t even have the energy to go down to the basement to get alcohol. My body, drooping with disappointment, collapsed sideways.

Tae-rim-ssi’s shadow covered my body, which was lying horizontally on the sofa.

“Hae-ah.”

He called me, trailing off. I was so sick of everything and so lethargic that I deliberately didn’t look at him. I only stared at the corner of the book on the flat table,

“…Okay.”

Tae-rim-ssi patted my shoulder.

“I give up. So, get up.”

My mind sparked at those words. I quickly raised my upper body, and a tingling sensation arose in my abdomen, but it was bearable.

“Really?”

While suppressing the laughter that was about to burst out, I pretended to be calm and got up from the sofa. I was worried that Tae-rim-ssi would take back his words, so I started walking quickly, and I heard sighs coming from behind me. Sigh a hundred times like that, and see if I miss an opportunity like today.

I got into the car, excited like a child going to an amusement park.

“You’ll never regret going with me.”

I was so confident.

I was going to make Tae-rim-ssi sprout wings on both shoulders, not make him regret it. I was confident because I knew everything about AOM, as well as the trends of other companies related to it.

Rather, I had to focus on not showing that I knew too much. If I made a mistake, I might be branded as an industrial spy.

The late summer night was so joyful. Standing in the position of Kang Hae-ah, Cheon Tae-rim’s husband, not the angry Kang Hae-ah, I did my part. No one who approached, no sentence that was heard, nothing made me cower. Everything was easy. It was something I had already rehearsed in my head several times, standing as Cheon Tae-rim’s partner.

After AOM CEO Cheon Tae-rim finished receiving the award, the party became even more lively. After a few tedious greetings, the wristwatch pointed to 9 o’clock. There was a reason why I looked at the watch around that time. It was because of a sudden dizziness that I checked how much time was left until the party ended.

‘Hmm…’

The words that circled around my ears were all ‘buzzing’, blurred. I smiled leisurely, pretending to understand all the sounds that rang like noise. I didn’t show the pain, acted naturally, stroked Tae-rim-ssi’s arm once, and moved, holding the glass that was empty from the beginning.

I went straight to the bathroom and washed my hands in cold water. After rinsing my mouth, I regained my senses. When I went outside, I saw Tae-rim-ssi, who had come out to the hallway to find me.

“Why did you come out when we were still talking?”

I approached him with a smiling face, but inwardly, I couldn’t help but sigh.

‘He found out.’

That’s what I thought. Now, Kang Hae-ah’s fake smile and acting no longer worked on the man named Cheon Tae-rim.

“Because of the air conditioning… it was too cold inside the party hall, so I came out for a while. Let’s go in, I’m okay.”

So, I made a fake confession. When I lightly pushed his hand with my cold hand, Tae-rim-ssi seemed to believe me.

“If you don’t feel well, be sure to tell me. The awards ceremony is over, so we can go home now.”

When he said that, his kind voice sounded higher than usual.

‘The awards ceremony is over, so we can go home now’, it was such a convenient lie. I couldn’t help but find Tae-rim-ssi, who thought I would believe those words, cute.

CEO Cheon Tae-rim, who received the most important award at this event, shouldn’t just disappear. If he used his husband as an excuse, no one would criticize him, but there was an atmosphere that could be read just by looking around. It seemed that the moment Cheon Tae-rim left, half of the people filling this party hall would lose interest and go home.

“Okay, okay.”

Pretending to believe the obvious lie, I put my cold fingers into his suit sleeve. Then Tae-rim-ssi took my hand.

‘Cute…’

I could feel that he was in a very good mood, even though he didn’t show it. His firm lips were drawing an arc, and a subtle blush was on his handsome ears.

He’s probably thinking that he did a good job bringing me here now. Thanks to me, he had a conversation with the president of a company that he didn’t know yet, but would sign a new contract with AOM within the next two years.

So, today was a lucky day for Tae-rim-ssi. It was a day to be rewarded for his abilities and efforts, and a monumental night to open the door to a network of people who would have a good relationship with him.

“You’re really okay, Hae-ah?”

“Yeah. I’m okay.”

So, enduring the blurry dizziness for about an hour was not a problem.

Pulling Tae-rim-ssi’s arm, I took him back into the party hall. I deliberately turned away from President Choi, who was approaching with big strides. I couldn’t make our Tae-rim-ssi friends with a president who didn’t even know that embezzlement was happening in his foreign subsidiary.

At that moment, a familiar voice caught my ear. What was it,

“Ah, Team Leader, really…”

Then a grumbling sound followed.

‘Huh?’

Looking around, I searched for the owner of the voice. There were faces following Tae-rim-ssi at a reasonable distance. It was AOM Development Team Leader Kim Min-soo, who was with us at today’s awards ceremony, Chief Secretary Si Eun-cheol, and one employee I had never seen before.

The three of them were talking among themselves when they suddenly saw me. To be exact, Si Eun-cheol turned his head and met my eyes, and the development team leader followed his gaze, looking around blankly. For a moment, a very intense, awkward atmosphere passed between Si Eun-cheol and me.

“…….”

Come to think of it, I hadn’t met Si Eun-cheol since the opening ceremony. Since he and I didn’t exchange friendly greeting texts, to Si Eun-cheol, Kang Hae-ah was… the last image would be of him clinging to his brother’s leg, crying not to hit him.

Feeling awkward and embarrassed, I turned my back, pretending not to notice. It was because of the rushing dizziness. It felt like the ground under my feet was sinking, and the weight in my head started shaking from side to side like a metronome.

I checked the watch again. I thought it was around 10 o’clock, but only 20 minutes had passed since the first dizziness.

’20 minutes…’

With that ignorant belief that I could ignore that much of a cycle, I tried to endure a little longer. But in less than 10 minutes, my vision blurred again, and I felt nauseous. Even a surge of vomit rose in the middle of a smiling conversation.

“…….”

The regurgitated stomach acid had a terrible taste. I swallowed the forcibly bitter saliva and took a step back from the conversation of the business people.

As Tae-rim-ssi’s head followed gently,

“It’s a bit boring.”

I smiled with my mouth closed.

I pointed to the terrace and slightly took Tae-rim-ssi’s hand away. I would be grateful if he would just think of me as immature and still young for hearing the excuse that it was ‘boring’. As soon as I dragged my trembling legs out onto the terrace,

“Ugh…”

I felt nauseous again.

I coughed while hacking, but there was no vomit. As I sat down on the white iron chair, the humid air of the summer night covered my chilled skin. I stared blankly at the damp night scenery and took a deep breath.

The injured abdomen was tingling because of the coughing. Just as I was about to check the watch again, the terrace curtain was slightly pulled back. Surprised, I turned around and saw Si Eun-cheol.

“…….”

He walked out onto the terrace without a word. The action of quickly closing the glass door and closing the curtain he had pulled back was quick. With a flushed face, I swallowed hard.

“Why… is Tae-rim-ssi checking on me again?”

Si Eun-cheol’s expression changed abruptly at my joking words. His face, looking at me like a Rakshasa or a demon, was scary today.

“I didn’t come because he sent me, so mind your own business.”

His cold words and actions didn’t match at all. If that wasn’t the case, I wanted to ask why he had come to find me, who had even run away outside. I also wanted to argue why he was looking at my complexion with those eyes, why he was reaching out and touching my forehead, and why he was clicking his tongue again.

But only a faint groan came out of my mouth.

‘The timing is so cruel…’

The heat rushed to my face, and the dizziness that blurred everything came again. My vision shook as if I was about to faint, and my upper body leaned forward sharply.

Si Eun-cheol’s hand quickly supported my body, which was about to fall over while still sitting on the chair. He supported me and leaned me back against the back of the chair. My head touched his chest area powerlessly and then slumped down again.

“Un… did you…?”

The words Si Eun-cheol asked were,

“…ssi.”

It was as faint as the noise coming from outside the window.

“…Ah, damn it. Kang Hae-ah-ssi.”

His hand tapped my cheek, tap, tap. I came to my senses with a burning pain. When I lifted my head, I saw Si Eun-cheol’s ear. The distance between him and me was embarrassingly close. With his head in front of my nose, which was only blinking, he was listening to my breath and smelling it.

Si Eun-cheol’s eyes, which were swaying from side to side, were somehow familiar. It didn’t seem like anyone had ever looked at me like that… but I think my eyes had been like that before.

“Wait here without moving. Don’t come out.”

Si Eun-cheol cut off my thoughts with a stiff voice. Then he jumped up and took off his coat. A silver-gray suit jacket covered my body.

I fainted for a moment.

When I came to again, my cheek was wet. I frowned at the feeling of water splashing on my face, and Si Eun-cheol flicked his fingers more deliberately, as if to show off. The cold water he had soaked his hand in repeatedly drenched my face.

“What are you doing?”

I spoke, annoyance rising in my dull mind, and

“To make you take your medicine.”

He grabbed my chin and shoved a pill into my open mouth.

“It’s a fever reducer that Tae-rim used to take when he had a fever due to allergies, so take one for now.”

Then he handed me a small bottle of water.

‘I’m a mess, but Eun-cheol-ssi is something else…’

As I forced down the bitter medicine, that thought suddenly popped into my head.

I didn’t realize how multifaceted people could be. Yesterday, I thought that Si Eun-cheol-ssi and I were definitely in a relationship where we could never like each other, but today was different. He might see Kang Hae-ah as a strange and capricious weirdo, but to me, Si Eun-cheol was the strange and capricious weirdo.

“Why are you suddenly being so nice to me…?”

I was bewildered by Si Eun-cheol’s kind face. I almost wished he would just brag about his Cheon Tae-rim knowledge with a smug look on his face, saying ‘Tae-rim this’ and ‘Tae-rim that’, or go back to being mean to me.

As if reading my mind, Si Eun-cheol frowned. The momentary tenderness in his eyes, as if he were feeling pity, was replaced with annoyance.

‘Okay, now that’s more like it.’

With his face flushed with fever, Si Eun-cheol glared at me. Then he said,

“Kang Hae-ah, why are you being like this to me?”

Soon, the sound of insects, whether cicadas or crickets, rang in my ears. I had sweated so much that the lining of the coat he had put over me seemed to be soaked. Forcing myself to sit up with my slippery body, I looked up at him.

“…You know everything, don’t you?”

The question was somewhat out of the blue, but

“You know everything, so why don’t you tell Tae-rim?”

It didn’t surprise me.

“Ugh…”

I groaned, lowering my voice. Si Eun-cheol’s guess was correct. I knew everything. What this sudden question meant, the reason for Si Eun-cheol-ssi’s unpredictable attitude… I had come to know it all. That day… at the opening of Hyung’s solo exhibition, when I was sprawled in the corner of the room after being called in, I realized it when our eyes met.

Si Eun-cheol-ssi was a liar and a bad person. In my past life, he was one of the people who tormented me even more when I was already exhausted, he was his close friend who would never accept me as Cheon Tae-rim’s husband even if he died, and he was a jerk who looked down on me in the past because I was a Beta and now because I was a recessive Omega.

But I didn’t hate him. Now that I knew why he insisted on staying by Tae-rim-ssi’s side and was so eager to be with him, I felt sorry for him.

“What… what do I know? I don’t really know what you’re talking about…”

I lied to protect the pride of Si Eun-cheol, the haughty Dominant Omega. Because he would hate to admit it in front of me… that he had also imprinted, on Cheon Tae-rim.

And that it was very One-sided, and although I didn’t know exactly when, it was a very long time ago.

Si Eun-cheol was the one who repeatedly tied Cheon Tae-rim and himself together with the word ‘we’. But there was a difference in their traits. Si Eun-cheol was a typical Dominant Omega, but Cheon Tae-rim was a more remarkable man than the average Dominant Alpha. The fact that he had achieved One-sided Imprinting without sex symbolized that. That even Si Eun-cheol could not be grouped as the same level Omega next to Cheon Tae-rim.

“…I don’t know anything, Eun-cheol.”

I decided to give him a way out. I decided to turn a blind eye. Because if I didn’t know… he could continue to hold the title of friend next to Tae-rim-ssi.

I knew my husband’s personality. My Alpha Cheon Tae-rim, who had a very clear distinction between public and private matters, was not the kind of person who would ever give the role or place of a friend to an Omega who had One-sided Imprinting on him. He wouldn’t be let go from AOM, but at least he would have to leave the secretary’s office.

‘Then it would be painful…’

I also knew the pain that would befall Si Eun-cheol. The extreme depression and self-loathing that flooded in when separated from the Alpha he had One-sided Imprinting on, the sadness and deep suicidal impulses that made me want to stop it even if it meant smashing my head. I had already experienced it.

So,

‘I don’t like him!’

Si Eun-cheol’s words shouted in the garage that day were not entirely false. Liking Cheon Tae-rim was something the heart did, but imprinting on him was something the body did. I didn’t know how blurred the line was, since feelings were ultimately the result of hormones.

He didn’t want to be in pain when Cheon Tae-rim left… so he kept expanding the position of friend, claiming ownership of that role, and in the end, he must have hated the fact that the person who took Tae-rim-ssi’s side was a recessive Omega with a lot of money.

I didn’t hate Si Eun-cheol like that. Because I was the only one who could recognize Si Eun-cheol like that. I didn’t think of him as a villain anymore. Rather, I felt a pathetic sense of kinship towards him.

“Don’t make that face.”

A hollow laugh escaped through my teeth.

“I’m not going to take Eun-cheol’s place…”

As I smiled, Si Eun-cheol suddenly grabbed my cheek. My cheek was incredibly sore, as if caught in a crab’s claw. As I thought my flesh would fall off from the hand that was pinching and pulling my cheeks tightly, Si Eun-cheol lowered his head.

One thing became clear. I was better than Si Eun-cheol, at kissing.

To give a general review, I would say I was a 9, and Si Eun-cheol was about a 5. The kiss he gave me by surprise was too rough. My top teeth collided with his, and I was so shocked by the pain that I almost lost my mind. Of course, in my life, the only perfect score was our Tae-rim-ssi….

I must have been out of it for a moment because my mind was hazy. The foolish thoughts that had seeped into my head suddenly flew away like gnats. Si Eun-cheol’s lips, which had been pressed tightly against mine like a stamp, also fell away around that time.

The earlobe I saw when I blinked my surprised eyes was a high-purity red.

“Who do you… who do you think you are, pitying me?”

I was reflected in his blazing eyes.

“You annoying bastard.”

Then he cursed.

‘He kissed me first, so why is he…’

I wasn’t qualified to argue like that. Because I was the one who had first hugged him and kissed him to shut him up.

But even then and even now, for some reason, I looked calm and Si Eun-cheol looked like he had been wronged. Wiping his lips with the back of his hand, he darted his eyes from side to side.

“You crazy bastard. You’re the weird one, so why… why are you making me weird?”

Si Eun-cheol said. The end of his voice was hoarse, as if he was out of breath.

I thought I had done a good job coming out to the terrace. If anyone had seen us, they would have mistaken me for doing something terrible.

“Pfft…”

The sound of air escaping leaked through my teeth. I couldn’t stop myself from laughing. He used to treat someone like me like a fly, but look at Si Eun-cheol now. He was so fiercely haughty, but he’s a complete idiot, getting shaken up just because we bumped lips a little. And that too, by me, who he treated like a second-rate recessive Omega.

‘You idiot. I just… I just did it because I didn’t want to get hit.’

Si Eun-cheol looked at me, who was shaking his shoulders and laughing, as if I were a ghost. He didn’t seem to expect my reaction to be like this when he kissed me impulsively.

“Ah, this is so funny…”

My stomach hurt because I laughed so hard. I clutched it with both hands and chuckled even as I groaned.

“Why are you doing this? Si Eun-cheol-ssi, do you like me?”

Then Si Eun-cheol shuddered. He glanced at me with eyes that held complex emotions for a moment, then he turned away.

“Hah…”

Si Eun-cheol, who was gripping the terrace railing and straightening his back, looked stiffer than usual. He took in the outside air, away from me.

“Don’t… don’t misunderstand. It’s because of the pheromone scent. I was just crazy for a moment. That’s why recessive Omegas…”

It seemed he had smelled my scent, just like I had smelled his in the past.

‘Oh… no.’

That shouldn’t be happening.

‘My scent is… coming out now?’

It had been a long time since I had entered the stable period, and I had finished my medicated baths well, so there was no reason for that.

“…Just get knotted quickly.”

Si Eun-cheol said without even looking at me. His sharp profile was quite fierce. His eyes were red, and it was hard to tell if it was because of the fever or because he was embarrassed. A very complicated sigh escaped through his teeth.

“I can’t stand it because I’m miserable that I still hate you… so just do that.”

At the end of his words, he let out a series of rough breaths that sounded like ‘huh’. Unlike him, who was fierce and sensitive, my mind was becoming duller by the second.

‘Just get knotted. What will be solved by knotting? Ah… in the past, knotting… what was it? I think I read a medical journal…’

There was an article that I had looked at with interest, but I couldn’t remember it at all. It felt like a hundred brain cells were falling asleep every time I breathed.

Si Eun-cheol ran away, leaving me blinking blankly. His steps as he ran out of the terrace were as quick as a thief, so I didn’t even have a moment to tease him. My cheeks, which he had grabbed so tightly, were still sore.

‘He says he hates me, but why did he kiss me?’

A hollow laugh escaped my lips. Wiping my lips with the back of my hand, I thought the night air had become cold. The summer night’s heat couldn’t have suddenly disappeared, so it seemed my body temperature had risen that much.

Less than a minute after I started having foolish thoughts, Tae-rim-ssi came to find me. Si Eun-cheol, who had already returned to being a kind secretary, was with him.

“Hae-ah! What’s wrong with your face?”

Tae-rim-ssi was very interested in my red cheeks, and as a result, Si Eun-cheol’s neat smile seemed to distort slightly.

“Let’s go, before something big happens.”

Tae-rim-ssi said, stroking my forehead and cheeks alternately. If he kept touching me like this every day, would my face be shaved down little by little and become as small as a rice ball in 10 years?

“Ah, no. Tae-rim-ssi even received an award… how can we just leave right away? I’m okay, and it’s a bit much to call Driver Oh again…”

“He’s probably still waiting downstairs. If he’s not, I’ll drive. I didn’t drink any alcohol.”

Tae-rim-ssi didn’t understand my heart, which didn’t want to ruin his happy day at all.

“Listen to me, Hae-ah. We have to go home right now.”

With a face as tense as someone who had a zombie apocalypse in front of them, he took off his suit jacket and put it over my shoulders. Thanks to that, I became rich in sleeves, with Si Eun-cheol’s clothes and Tae-rim-ssi’s jacket on top of my own.

I’m not someone who’s lacking in physique, but Tae-rim-ssi was just too big. His jacket was also too big, and it smelled so good of perfume and body scent that I couldn’t refuse it.

Holding Tae-rim-ssi’s hand, I quietly left the party. It was thanks to Si Eun-cheol, who guided us to a side door where we wouldn’t bump into people, like a traffic control police officer.

When I stepped outside the building and breathed in the fresh air, my body temperature rose even more. It wasn’t just that I was in bad condition, I wondered if I had caught some kind of disease. I struggled to hold on to my dazed mind and staggered to the car.

Driver Oh, who I thought had gone home, appeared in a hurry. It was as Tae-rim-ssi had said, that he was still waiting.

‘Since when did Tae-rim-ssi know Driver Oh better than I did…’

The question popped up, then quickly disappeared.

I must have been in bad shape, seeing as Si Eun-cheol even opened the car door for me.

“See you next time, Eun-cheol Hyung.”

I said as I slipped into the car he opened for me. When I looked up with a smile even though I had no energy, Si Eun-cheol’s expression was a sight to behold. He opened his mouth wide and frowned, then

“Crazy bastard…”

Then he turned away abruptly. I happily watched Si Eun-cheol’s hurrying figure disappear.

Tae-rim-ssi’s gaze followed him for a moment, then turned back to me.

“…You and Eun-cheol are now on a Hyung-dongsaeng relationship? Since when were you so close…?”

He asked, with his hand on the back door. I stared blankly up at his very displeased face. Who was the one who introduced him to me and told me to get along, and sent him to our house several times on errands…?

“Tae-rim-ssi doesn’t know.”

I had no choice but to answer that, as there was no other way to explain it.

“…There are things that Omegas understand between themselves.”

When I added that, Tae-rim-ssi was silent for a few seconds, then slammed the door shut. He could have just told me to move over, but he walked around the car and got into the passenger seat without saying a word.

Was he upset that I was pretending to be close to his best friend? He wasn’t that petty of a person… As I slowly thought about it, my body became more and more limp every second.

Like a balloon with the air let out, no, not like that… like a deflated balloon….

Blinking… I opened my eyes and my whole body was hot and my chest was very heavy. The darkness of the night crawled on the bedroom walls. The light from the small lamp on the bedside table flickered like a mirage. I looked down, wondering if I had a stone on my chest, and saw that several blankets, maybe three or four, were piled on top of me.

“Hngh, hmm…”

A groan escaped through my teeth.

I wanted to get out of bed, but my body wouldn’t listen. A languid fatigue weighed down on my body like scissors, and the area under my back was soaked with sweat, and even my butt was wet. I wondered if I had caught a cold.

Forcing my eyes to roll, I saw Tae-rim-ssi sitting in the darkness. He was sitting in an armchair five steps away from the bed, leaning his upper body forward and resting his arms on his knees. His face was not visible due to the shadows.

“I’m sorry… I think I fell asleep in the car. Did Tae-rim-ssi… move me?”

I said, stammering and speaking with a dull pronunciation. Tae-rim-ssi didn’t answer my hard-won words, which was cruel.

I narrowed my eyes and tried to see him more clearly, wondering if it was Tae-rim-ssi… but something was wrong. Not him, but me….

I realized then that the heat that was swirling inside my skin was different from the heat of a cold. It was hot not because I was sick, but because I was aroused. It was true that my back was soaked with sweat. But what was flowing inside my panties was a fluid that I didn’t know whether it was semen or precum.

I thought I heard a strange, panting groan, but it was the sound coming from my mouth.

“Tae-rim-ssi…”

I squeezed my eyes shut and opened them again, and finally I could see Tae-rim-ssi’s face. With veins standing out on his forehead, he was suppressing his aroused breath. All the strength drained from my body at the sight of his eyes, which were lusting after me like a hungry beast, as if I were a rabbit caught in a trap.

“Hold me.”

I said carelessly, pushing the blanket off with my toes.

“Hold me…”

It was my first heat.

My sudden heat, as sudden as my late awakening, was very difficult. My memories were fragmented, and I fainted just as many times. The scenery I saw every time I opened my eyes was similar, but the details were different.

“Ugh, ungh…”

I would come to my senses at the unfamiliar moaning, only to realize it was the sound flowing out of my mouth, and

“Hah…”

I would open my eyes at the unpleasant feeling of being wet, only to realize it was the semen I had released.

I repeatedly thought I was awake, only to have my vision blur again, and I thought I had woken up, only to have my whole body collapse in exhaustion. A time when I didn’t know what I was doing, what I was saying, what my expression was like, or where my arms and legs were, paralyzed me.

When I struggled to open my eyes, Tae-rim-ssi’s palm was covering my lips.

“Mmph…”

A sweet liquid oozed out through my tightly closed lips. Startled by the unfamiliar and artificial taste of the medicine, I flailed my arms and legs haphazardly. My head and shoulders were buried in the bed mattress. My back was lifted up and my legs were wrapped around Tae-rim-ssi’s waist as if hugging him.

In the midst of the suffocating tension, I reached out and grabbed his arm and pushed his shoulder. The muscles on Tae-rim-ssi’s shoulders and arms, which were covered in thick beads of sweat, were taut as if they would burst.

“Ugh, ooph!”

I was first surprised that both he and I were naked, and then shocked that he didn’t budge at my resistance and kept covering my mouth. Tears started to flow at the unknown situation, and the skin around my eyes was already sore, as if I had been crying for a long time.

‘Why… why?’

I squeezed my eyes shut and breathed wetly on his palm.

‘What… what are you doing?’

The medicine in my mouth kept gurgling and flowing out of my lips, between Tae-rim-ssi’s fingers.

“Swallow it.”

He commanded. Looking up at him with wet eyes, I thrashed my numb arms and legs.

“Swallow it, quickly.”

“Mmph, hngh…”

I tried to force the liquid in my mouth down, hiccuping, but I felt nauseous due to an instinctive aversion. At the moment when my nerves became sharp and my stomach became sad, I shook my head, which was being held. I tightened my legs around his waist and punched him wildly.

Even as Tae-rim-ssi was hit on his forearm and shoulder by my fists, he didn’t budge an inch. The veins in his forehead were standing out, and the contours of his jaw were sharp; he looked just like an angry person, which scared me.

“Ugh, ugh-buhb, ugh…”

I made a sound, spilling about half of the medicine in my mouth.

“Woo…, ugh…, ee-ee…”

His hand loosened as if he understood the name I called with effort while sobbing. Taking the opportunity, I quickly knocked his arm away and coughed, choking. The pink liquid that had been mixed with saliva and pooled in my mouth flowed haphazardly onto the sheets and my chest.

“Ugh, sniff…”

Wiping my chin and looking around, I saw that I was still in the bedroom, but the sun outside the window was bright. Tears welled up in my eyes from the confusing and scary feeling.

“…Hae-ah?”

Tae-rim-ssi’s hand reached out and grabbed my shoulder. Apart from loving and cherishing him, I couldn’t be caught by that hand. Startled, I instinctively avoided it. I scrambled around on the bed in a fluster.

Suddenly, my hand, which should have been on the mattress, fell into empty space. The moment my heart dropped, my weakened body fell onto the carpet with a ‘thud.’

“Ugh.”

The impact of falling from the bed itself wasn’t severe, but it was a different story if I bumped my already bruised and sore stomach. I hugged my stomach and writhed in pain. Every time I shed tears, the skin around my eyes ached as if it were chafed.

Looking again, I saw red handprints all over my body. My wrists, waist, arms, and legs were all mottled and bright red. Looking down at my thighs, I saw thin streams of whitish semen trickling down.

I felt a gush of liquid surging between my buttocks. My face flushed instantly.

“Hae-ah, no.”

With a face as surprised as mine, Tae-rim-ssi got off the bed. It was the moment when his half-erect penis and naked body were exposed.

“Why, why…”

Stuttering, I crawled backward. He didn’t forcibly grab me as I retreated on my hands and knees until the back of my head touched the bedroom wall.

“Why did you… do that to me…”

The rest of the words didn’t come out easily. It was too heavy a thing to ask all of a sudden, and partly because I had faith that Cheon Tae-rim-ssi would never… do such a thing.

As I trailed off and shed tears in confusion,

“No…, it’s not!”

Tae-rim-ssi suddenly shouted.

“It wasn’t me, Hae-ah…!”

It had been a long time since I’d seen his face so desperate. He couldn’t hide his flustered expression, and his voice was very loud.

Startled, I lifted my head, and I immediately understood the meaning of his excuse. Starting with the hand that was touching my knee right now, it was a mess of bite marks.

“……”

My mouth opened on its own, and my eyes were filled with shock. Tae-rim-ssi’s appearance was a mess. He was even more red, bruised, and injured than I was. His fingers, the sides of his hands, and even his wrists had been bitten haphazardly by some beast, and the bite marks were round, as if left by a person.

When I raised my eyes to look again, I finally saw the drops of blood on his neck and shoulders. The bite marks were terribly deep. There were blue bruises and red marks all over his shoulders, chest, and stomach, and there were even handprints on his neck as if someone had strangled him.

Tears welled up from a different kind of shock than before.

“Sniff…”

Before my startled reason could face the facts,

“It’s okay.”

Tae-rim-ssi’s hand reached out to me again.

This time, I didn’t avoid his hand. It was because I knew that he hadn’t forced himself on me. Rather, it was me…

“Did I do that?”

It seemed I had attacked him.

I felt sad, ashamed, and sorry, and tears streamed down my face. Sobbing, I retreated as far into the corner as possible. When I realized why Tae-rim-ssi had forcibly subdued me, all the strength drained from my legs.

‘What have I done?’

I tried to piece together the broken memories, but I couldn’t remember anything at all. My mind was just dark, like a maze.

“What do I do?”

I rubbed away the tears with the back of my hand and shook my head repeatedly.

“What do I do…”

I was so sorry and guilty that I couldn’t even look him in the face. There were scratches all over the forearm that was cautiously touching my knee. It looked like some beast had been there, but that beast was me.

“It’s okay.”

Even in the midst of all this, Tae-rim-ssi was kind. His cautious hand grabbed my chin and gently pulled me up. I looked at him, crying unsightly tears. The tip of his thumb, wiping my red, chapped lips, was thick.

“Don’t misunderstand, I only did it because I was afraid you’d get hurt.”

Tae-rim-ssi said in a much calmer voice. I nodded, making a tearful face.

“It’s because of the heat cycle, so don’t blame yourself. I’m not hurt.”

Soon, Tae-rim-ssi’s hands cupped my cheeks. I covered his hands with my own and nodded again.

As if relieved by my reaction, he spread his arms. I knew immediately what to do. I quickly crawled into his arms and wrapped my arms around his thick neck. I could see the nail marks all over his shoulders and back.

Tears welled up again.

“You are hurt.”

I said with a sorrowful voice, and

“I told you it’s okay.”

He hugged me, letting me hear the soothing sound of his breath.

I knew that instincts became stronger when a heat cycle came and you experienced your first heat. But the heat I had imagined wasn’t like this. I thought that when an Omega went into heat, they would just… beg to be held and cling to Tae-rim-ssi’s legs.

As I felt Tae-rim-ssi’s heart pounding loudly, I could see traces of the previous struggle on his skin. Judging by the handprints left on my body… it seemed more like one-sided violence than a fight.

It was a very regrettable thing that I was the perpetrator.

‘I hit Tae-rim-ssi…’

Returning to the already messy bed, Tae-rim-ssi laid me down. As he stood up and tried to get away from me, I desperately grabbed his arm.

“Are you angry?”

Anxious, a plaintive voice popped out.

“I’m sorry, I… I didn’t know, I didn’t know what I was doing… What if you leave? I… I don’t remember. Tae-rim-ssi, I’m sorry. Are you… angry because of me?”

Tae-rim-ssi sighed at my rambling words.

“I was just going to get a wet towel.”

He said, and

“Still… don’t go…”

I forcibly pulled his arm.

Then, pretending to give in, Tae-rim-ssi climbed onto the bed. I stretched my upper body over his knees as he sat on the edge of the bed next to me. I hugged his waist with both arms and buried my face in his shoulder. The reddened skin was warmly mashed against me.

Only then did light shine into my despairing heart. The scary, confused, and sad mind slowly became tinged with a different color.

“I’m sorry for hitting you.”

I carefully kissed his bruised shoulder. When he brushed my hair back, I took that hand and rubbed my lips against the knuckles with the bite marks.

“Did it hurt a lot?”

Then, the smile on Tae-rim-ssi’s face as he looked at me was kind, but it began to fade very slowly. With my chin resting on the back of his hand, I admired his pupils. They shook slightly from side to side, looking back and forth between my eyes, and it seemed as if a small realization was reflected in them.

“Hae-ah.”

While slowly removing my hand,

“…Didn’t you swallow the medicine?”

He asked.

“What medicine?”

As soon as I asked back in bewilderment, Tae-rim-ssi reached for the bedside table. I climbed onto his body with all my might as he grabbed the open brown medicine bottle.

The bottle rolled off onto the sheet, and the pink liquid that I had spat out a little while ago spilled out in a rush.

Naked, Tae-rim-ssi fell heavily onto the soft mattress. My mind dulled, and my butt sat on his lower abdomen.

I sucked on Tae-rim-ssi’s lips, which were parted in surprise, with complete absorption. I found his tongue, which kept trying to hide inside, and pushed my tongue tip in, running it over the bumpy roof of his mouth, which felt good. Hissing breaths escaped roughly, and his excited body heated up in an instant.

The pheromones pouring out of me were so strong that even the beads of sweat that formed on my skin felt like a potent perfume.

“Hae-ah, yah…”

Tae-rim-ssi’s thick neck stiffened in an instant. Looking down at him as he closed his parted lips and forcibly held his breath, I panted strangely loudly. His penis, which had been drooping, twitched and stood up again, and moist precum was already flowing thickly.

Tae-rim-ssi’s hand touched my waist. But I was more of an expert at stopping the other person. I knew how to stop an excited Tae-rim-ssi, and even how to stop him from stopping me.

As soon as his fingertips touched the bruise on my stomach,

“Ugh…”

All I had to do was make a tearful face as if it hurt.

As if flustered by the obvious acting, Tae-rim-ssi removed his hand. I grabbed his two hands, which were floating in the air, and intertwined our fingers, pressing both arms down on the sheet. As I moved my hips like that, his half-erect penis touched the underside of my butt.

I rubbed the hot flesh between my buttocks, panting hot breaths. I licked my parched lips with my tongue.

It seemed like sparks were flying from Tae-rim-ssi’s gaze, which was filled with bewilderment. He seemed to realize belatedly that he had been tricked by me.

Soon, a battle of strength ensued. He wriggled and moved to try to get me off, and I put all my weight on him to press down on his two hands.

“Hah…”

The Alpha scent began to emanate from Tae-rim-ssi’s greatly swollen manhood. My hot heart was filled with anticipation, and my mouth was filled with saliva.

“Tae-rim-ssi, euung…”

As I pressed down with my butt, crushing the hard and hot thing, he gritted his teeth. He snatched back the hands that had been caught and grabbed my shoulders, trying to push me aside, next to the bed.

Only then could I understand the context of the past events.

‘Do you think I’m too weak?’

Cheon Tae-rim hadn’t properly subdued me. If he was determined to suppress me, he could crush me like a bug, but he didn’t. Even the hand that was holding my shoulder wasn’t putting much strength into it, so it was only shaking me, not enough to push me away.

I was one hundred and eighty centimeters tall and twenty-six years old. With such an ambiguous attitude, he couldn’t beat me if I was determined to attack. Tae-rim-ssi, who was a natural fighter, must have known that fact.

Soon, a small realization warmed my heart. Tae-rim-ssi didn’t have the desire to win the fight against me… he was only afraid that he might accidentally break something of mine if he touched me wrong.

To such a loving person, whose intentions themselves were lovely, I whispered like a devil.

“It hurts.”

With dazed eyes and no conscience,

“Then I’ll hurt, Tae-rim-ssi.”

I spouted words that he could never refuse.

Then, Tae-rim-ssi’s eyes filled with sadness. As if in pain, he raised his hand and covered his eyes. I pressed my stomach against his and quickly lay down. I felt sorry for hurting him and guilty for making him feel embarrassed, but more than that… it felt good.

“Tae-rim-ssi…”

I liked his breath, which was groaning because he couldn’t push me away, and I liked his chest, which swelled and subsided repeatedly, and

“Please, Hae-ah…”

I liked his voice, which was moaning in excitement. It felt so good that shivers ran all over my body.

I kissed the back of his hand, which was covering his face, and clung to him even more tightly. Then, Tae-rim-ssi’s groan became even deeper.

“If you do this… I’m not confident I can hold back. I’m not confident I can keep you from getting hurt.”

Listening to his hoarse voice, as if boiling, I rubbed my flesh against his body. I was breathing hard and pleasantly, and the area under my butt was wet with bodily fluids.

A moan flowed out between my teeth on its own.

“Euung, euung…”

I took his hard, erect thing with trembling hands, put it to my rear, and matched it up. Because my body was wet with bodily fluids and trembling with excitement, the tip of his thick penis couldn’t enter my rear, and it slipped on the outside.

After fumbling a couple of times, I forcibly, almost collapsing, shoved his penis into me. My breath caught in my throat, and heat rose to the top of my head. My thighs trembled and collapsed, and slowly, my knees slid apart, sliding to either side of the sheet. As my body slowly went down, the sensation of being poked inside became deeper and deeper.

“Hah, heuek, euung…”

A drop of saliva fell from my parted lips. The only impulse that filled my head, which had become as dull as a beast’s, was the desire to become one with the Alpha in front of me, Cheon Tae-rim… that was all.

“……”

Tae-rim-ssi’s face turned red, with veins standing out on his forehead and Adam’s apple. I didn’t like his gaze, which was more rational than mine. I was momentarily angry at the hand that was grabbing my thigh and pushing me away.

I swung my hand and slapped his cheek.

“…Ha.”

After being slapped on the cheek with a smack, Tae-rim-ssi had a dazed expression.

I put my hands on his chest, which he was looking at me with a dumbfounded expression, his mouth open. The breath that was escaping from his nose with a snort was hot.

“Stay still…”

…the rest of the words were slurred together with a moan.

I sat down on top of his penis, which was twitching and throbbing. The feeling of a foreign object filling me became huge, and I felt like my organs were being crushed.

Again, it seemed like Tae-rim-ssi called my name. He grabbed my waist, which was heaving and shedding tears and saliva, and tried to push me away to get rid of me. I gritted my teeth and endured, grabbing his thick neck with both hands and pressing down.

‘Cough,’ he grimaced, letting out a rough breath. As I strangled his hard neck tightly, I twitched the muscles of my rear.

“Heoeok…, hah…”

Veins bulged on Tae-rim-ssi’s forehead. The face that was holding onto my forearm and enduring looked painful.

I leaned deeply toward him. It felt good to rub my lips against his cheek and lick his earlobe with my tongue, while breathing hot breaths.

However, as soon as my hand holding his neck loosened, Tae-rim-ssi pushed me away, and I bit his lower lip hard.

“Ugh…”

Letting out a short groan, Tae-rim-ssi swung his hand. I was slapped on the cheek by the back of his hand, which he had swung without thinking, and I fell straight back.

“Ah!”

A slender groan flowed out uncontrollably. My weakened upper body slumped to the side.

“Hae…, Hae-ah.”

I heard his breath, panting in surprise, and

“Sniff, ugh…”

As soon as my dazed mind woke up, tears welled up and poured out. Even as I cried until I was exhausted, I trembled at the sensation of being stabbed inside. Just the fact that I had shoved Cheon Tae-rim’s penis inside me made me excited, and it felt like I was going to cum already.

But on the other hand,

“Sniff, Tae-rim-ssi…”

I was on the verge of dying of shame for my inexplicable actions. Shame dyed my soul red. Tears kept streaming down my face in bewilderment, but I couldn’t stop my heaving body.

“Sniff, ugh…, euung, euung…”

As soon as I awkwardly straightened my waist, I moved like a beast in heat.

“Ugh, sniff…”

I grabbed Tae-rim-ssi’s lost hand and put it on the cheek that had been hit. As his rough palm touched my red, flushed cheek, after a slight hesitation, he began to caress it.

At that time, he seemed to understand the gaze in my eyes, which was filled with pleading. It was clearly my body and the things I was doing, but I couldn’t control a single fingertip as I wanted. With my mouth open and moaning, I moved up and down on top of Cheon Tae-rim. It was like I was masturbating with his penis.

“Sniff…”

Thick drops of tears fell onto Tae-rim-ssi’s stomach.

“Hold me…”

As I begged, twitching my rear, I hoped that he wouldn’t dismiss even these words as just something I was saying because I was in heat…

“You don’t have to hold back, sniff, it’s okay, knotting, please… I want to do it. Please do it…, huh? Please, please…”

If I was misunderstood as just lying to have sex,

“I love you…”

I felt like I would really die of sadness.

“I love you, Tae-rim-ssi. Really, so much… sometimes I want to cry… I, so much… love you.”

Confessions that I had never made in my life poured out like tears. I cried because I felt desperate, scared, and partly ashamed. Who would have imagined such a confession?

“Euung…, ah, ah…!”

Forcibly climbing on top of him and shaking my hips,

“I love you…”

I sobbed and moaned again and again.

I love you, I love you, I love you… Like a teddy bear with a tape recorder, I shouted repeatedly and heaved up and down. I spread my legs and fucked him so that Tae-rim-ssi’s penis stabbed inside me and crushed all my organs, and then I lost my words and moaned like a beast.

“……”

The moment my tears stopped and my breath stopped, I ejaculated onto his stomach. The amount of semen that oozed out wasn’t much. I had already cum several times, just based on how it felt, without realizing it.

My limp body collapsed on top of him.

“Heu, ugh…”

I had to forcibly straighten my trembling thighs because all the strength had drained from me. Tae-rim-ssi’s penis, which was poking inside me, was still swollen.

As I panted and braced myself on his stomach to pull my body out, a strange sensation surged up. The thing that was stuck between my parted buttocks was wriggling and getting bigger.

“Ah…”

With tears staining his face as he looked up, Kang Hae-ah saw a burning ember in Tae-rim-ssi’s eyes.

In an instant, his hands abruptly seized Kang Hae-ah’s waist. With a whoosh, Kang Hae-ah’s hips lifted, and his body fell backward. Between Kang Hae-ah’s parted legs, Tae-rim-ssi’s upper body crashed down on him like a massive building.

‘I’ve caused an accident.’

The thought flashed through Kang Hae-ah’s mind. He realized that Cheon Tae-rim had broken down the last dam he’d erected against his instincts.

But Kang Hae-ah had neither the opportunity nor the will to salvage the situation. Crushed by the sudden deluge of his body scent and weight, Kang Hae-ah lost his mind.

‘Even so, how could you use the word “heat” to describe a person?’

There was a time when Kang Hae-ah thought that way too. Ta-da, it’s gone now….

As Kang Hae-ah lay sprawled on the bed with his swollen eyes half-open, he was reminded of the past. Kang Hae-ah, at twenty, smoking a cigarette and clicking his tongue, saying, “Honestly,” that whether Alpha or Omega, they were still human, and wasn’t it too vulgar to apply the word “heat” to a social animal.

‘What do you know?’

Kang Hae-ah felt the swollen skin between his buttocks and his entire body, smeared with ejaculate that he couldn’t tell was his or Tae-rim-ssi’s, and he was furious.

‘What do you know, you bastard? Huh?’

All Kang Hae-ah could do was hate his past self. Amidst the tingling in his gut and the numbness of his skin, the fact that his penis was still half-erect doubled his frustration.

Huffing and puffing, Kang Hae-ah exhaled deeply, when suddenly a hand slipped under his arm. In an instant, it tightened around Kang Hae-ah’s waist, and he was dragged backward while lying down by a thick arm that pulled him. As Kang Hae-ah was embraced by a warm, hot mass of muscle, the injustice and resentment melted away.

“Tae-rim-ssi….”

Kang Hae-ah called out to him in a voice that had gone completely hoarse,

“…I can’t anymore.”

Kang Hae-ah pushed away the heavy penis that was poking at his buttock.

“Hmm….”

Then a sigh of regret touched Kang Hae-ah’s shoulder. The warm breath that circled his ear made his insides tingle.

The memories of the past, whether it was a day or several, were all faint and blurry. Kang Hae-ah couldn’t even accurately recall what he and Tae-rim had done or how much they had rolled around.

It was only for a moment that Kang Hae-ah felt wronged that his stomach hurt so much and his whole body was tingling and trembling, yet he couldn’t remember anything. It was thanks to the instinctive sense of fulfillment that had filled him.

Kang Hae-ah knew that he had received the something he had been craving all along. Only in Tae-rim-ssi’s arms did Kang Hae-ah feel that the thirst he had never known was quenched. Just as Kang Hae-ah was his Omega, he had become Kang Hae-ah’s Alpha…. There was no need for any particular evidence or explanation for that fact. Kang Hae-ah just knew… that he had imprinted on him and he had given Kang Hae-ah a knotting.

Kang Hae-ah quietly smiled. He felt good as he felt the morning sunlight streaming through the window and crawling up his calves.

“Why are you smiling?”

Tae-rim-ssi murmured in a voice still heavy with sleep, and

“Just….”

Kang Hae-ah let out a chuckle.

“…Because I’m happy.”

Then Kang Hae-ah pressed his back against his stomach. Tae-rim-ssi’s low breathing permeated Kang Hae-ah’s shoulder, earlobe, and chest.

Soon, Kang Hae-ah’s feelings about being in heat changed.

‘This is actually a good thing.’

Kang Hae-ah couldn’t help but be happy as he and Tae-rim-ssi took a nap all morning, and then hugged each other and rubbed their skin together at lunchtime. Kang Hae-ah was embraced in arms that made his knees twist and his insides tingle no matter how many times he was held, and as they engaged in a relationship for the fifth or tenth time, Kang Hae-ah didn’t know if he was a human or an animal.

Kang Hae-ah’s body, which had been tied to the bed as if by a spell, was only released in the afternoon. It was because an incredibly loud ‘growl’ came from Kang Hae-ah’s stomach.

“…….”

“…….”

Tae-rim-ssi got out of bed first, stopping in the middle of rubbing his body against Kang Hae-ah’s. Kang Hae-ah cooled down much later. As Kang Hae-ah followed him out of the bedroom, his gait was inevitably awkward.

As Kang Hae-ah covered his body with only a gown and almost limped down the stairs, the empty house felt desolate. Tae-rim-ssi explained the situation to Kang Hae-ah, who tilted his head, wondering why Do-jin wasn’t there, nor Ok-hye-ssi, nor Driver Oh. He said that Do-jin had been left at the kindergarten he attended for hoteling, and that Ok-hye-ssi and Driver Oh had been given a vacation.

“Why….”

The question disappeared as soon as it came out. Kang Hae-ah had some sense of shame. Looking at Kang Hae-ah’s condition and Tae-rim-ssi’s appearance, the answer was obvious. If either Kang Hae-ah, who was crying and riding on top of him, or Tae-rim-ssi, whose whole body was a mess because of Kang Hae-ah, were to be seen, the healthy employment relationship would be over that day.

“…Still, tell Do-jin to come home.”

Kang Hae-ah decided that as he ate the simple meal that Tae-rim-ssi had warmed up for him, taking a step back.

“He needs to eat home-cooked meals too…. Do-jin likes me so much. What if he thinks he’s been abandoned again if I keep leaving him at the hotel? Our poor Do-jin…. I miss Do-jin.”

“Okay. I’ll contact them to bring him tomorrow.”

“Okay….”

After filling their hungry stomachs, they both went into the spa tub together. As they sat facing each other and soaked their bodies in the hot water, Kang Hae-ah was captivated by a strange feeling. It was amazing that it was natural to wash together without even discussing it, and the strange sense of connection was new but already his.

Kang Hae-ah couldn’t help but smile quietly, and Tae-rim-ssi had the same expression as Kang Hae-ah. Kang Hae-ah glanced at his body, which was covered in mottled bite marks, and then slowly changed his position. He had decided to use the wide tub in a narrow way.

“…….”

As Kang Hae-ah quietly leaned against him,

“Come here.”

Tae-rim-ssi’s arm wrapped around Kang Hae-ah’s shoulder, which had already come closer.

Kang Hae-ah was made happy by him kissing his wet hair. Smiling, Kang Hae-ah touched his nose to his and rubbed his lips against his. Actions that had not been easy before were now all his.

Would there ever be another day in Kang Hae-ah’s life as blessed as today?

“…I think it’ll take at least another week to get better.”

Tae-rim-ssi said, pressing his nose against Kang Hae-ah’s cheek.

“We’ll be trapped together, in this house.”

Kang Hae-ah laughed childishly at the worried voice.

“…I like it, being together.”

“Then that’s a relief.”

Kang Hae-ah’s eyes widened at Tae-rim-ssi’s nonchalant answer. As Kang Hae-ah took his body away from him and examined him, his expression was indifferent. Seeing his face without a smile, Kang Hae-ah felt as if he had been splashed with cold water.

“Does Tae-rim-ssi not like it? If there’s anything I need to fix… just tell me.”

As Kang Hae-ah asked, his confidence, which had been full, disappeared, Tae-rim-ssi shook his head calmly.

“No. It’s quite the opposite.”

Then he narrowed his eyes and examined Kang Hae-ah. The hot water that had gathered under his chin fell into the tub with a ‘drip’ sound.

“You tell me. Let’s say it’s a report on suggestions.”

“Yes? What?”

“There must be something, something you want to say to me.”

Kang Hae-ah blinked, taken aback by the sudden words. Why, all of a sudden, was he being asked to report on suggestions? As Kang Hae-ah stared blankly,

“I just have a feeling.”

Tae-rim-ssi drove the point home.

“…….”

He wouldn’t know how much those words stung Kang Hae-ah. Kang Hae-ah was foolish to have easily assumed that the effects of the knotting would only affect him. Kang Hae-ah, a recessive Omega, could only be intoxicated by the happy bond, but Cheon Tae-rim, a Dominant Alpha, seemed to have gained a little more insight into the human being that was Kang Hae-ah.

Kang Hae-ah swallowed hard and watched him carefully. There was a secret that Kang Hae-ah hadn’t told Tae-rim-ssi. But there was no story that Kang Hae-ah could tell him.

Until the day he died, Kang Hae-ah intended to never tell anyone about the life he had already experienced once. Kang Hae-ah wanted to erase the memory of his failed marriage from his mind, let alone tell Tae-rim-ssi about it, if he could.

“Um…, our bed blanket.”

So Kang Hae-ah brought up another story. There was a suggestion that could be reported indirectly, if he looked for it.

“Tae-rim-ssi sometimes covers it with the top and bottom reversed, and it bothers me so much every time.”

“…The blanket.”

“Yes.”

‘And’, Kang Hae-ah continued to find stories to fill the silence.

“…I want to change Tae-rim-ssi’s skin and lotion too. This is just… I’m just saying it, so don’t take it to heart, but the brand you’re using now has been controversial because of animal testing, and I’m personally boycotting it. I’ll buy you something with a similar formula and better ingredients, so I hope you’ll change it.”

Tae-rim-ssi raised one eyebrow as he looked down at Kang Hae-ah chattering away. He looked interested in the lengthening story.

“Yes, I understand. And?”

“And… the soap Tae-rim-ssi uses. The one that erases the Alpha scent…. I hope you don’t use it on weekends. On days when it’s just me and you at home… I want to smell Tae-rim-ssi’s scent as much as I want.”

“Yes, yes. I will correct it as soon as possible.”

“And… um….”

Kang Hae-ah was a little excited by Tae-rim-ssi’s reaction, nodding as if he were receiving a serious report. Kang Hae-ah was also amazed that he had so many small and trivial complaints that he had been secretly accumulating in his mind.

Carried away by the excitement, without realizing it,

“Sometimes…, the expression Tae-rim-ssi makes when he looks at me is scary.”

That was until the truth popped out.

“…So I hope you’ll smile a little more when you look at me.”

This time, Tae-rim-ssi didn’t give him a funny answer like, ‘Yes, yes, I understand’. He frowned and tilted his head as if he couldn’t understand Kang Hae-ah’s words.

“What does that mean?”

He asked, and

‘Here we go again.’

Kang Hae-ah tried not to be intimidated by his hardened face.

“When Tae-rim-ssi looks at me…, sometimes… you look at me like you’re angry. Sometimes you glare, sometimes you’re expressionless. It doesn’t have to be completely fixed, but I’d like it if you smiled a little more….”

“No, Hae-ah.”

Tae-rim-ssi interrupted Kang Hae-ah and rubbed his face. A puzzled expression appeared on his face, which he wiped with his wet hands. After rolling his eyes with a thoughtful face for a moment, he asserted.

“I’ve never done that.”

“Yes?”

“I’ve never been angry at you, I’ve never glared at you, and I’ve never been expressionless.”

“…Oh, Tae-rim-ssi doesn’t know because it’s you.”

There was no need to think deeply, Kang Hae-ah was right. Even if Kang Hae-ah just thought about it lightly, many cold moments when Tae-rim-ssi looked at him came to mind. Kang Hae-ah’s stomach churned and he was sometimes even afraid, but the fact that Tae-rim-ssi hadn’t intended to do so was even more amazing.

Still, Tae-rim-ssi had no answer. He was just looking at Kang Hae-ah’s eyes with a puzzled expression, frowning.

Thanks to that, Kang Hae-ah felt stuffy and racked his brains. It would be difficult to make him understand if he stubbornly insisted on something he didn’t know… Kang Hae-ah wondered if there was a day when a record was left, and a branch came to mind.

“Ah!”

Kang Hae-ah suddenly lifted his face and shouted without realizing it, and then had to cover his mouth with his hand. Kang Hae-ah’s voice seemed to echo from the ceiling of the wide bathroom.

“…Then I’ll show you proof.”

Kang Hae-ah whispered softly in a much quieter voice. Tae-rim-ssi chuckled as if Kang Hae-ah’s actions were funny.

After the spa, when his muscles had softened, Kang Hae-ah finally found the ‘evidence’. Tae-rim-ssi had torn open bags of nachos and popcorn behind Kang Hae-ah, who was squatting in front of the TV cabinet in his fluffy pajamas. It was obvious that he wasn’t going to eat them, a man obsessed with exercise, and that he meant for Kang Hae-ah to eat them all, but there were too many snacks.

‘It’s not like we’re going to have fun watching something….’

Kang Hae-ah was worried and also looking forward to seeing how he would react when he found out how scary his expression was when he looked at him. In Kang Hae-ah’s hand was a home video. The mint-colored videotape had the date of the garden party that was held after returning from their honeymoon written on the outside.

The company that Kang Hae-ah had hired at the time had taken it as a service, and Kang Hae-ah had taken it with a smile, even though he thought to himself, ‘What’s with home videos in this day and age?’ It was because Kang Hae-ah had posted a lot of retro-style photos on his ‘Kang Hae-ah’ SNS account about six months ago. The photos sent by Han-seong’s advertising planning team even included the requested comments.

As a result of displaying things that were not to Kang Hae-ah’s taste without any qualms, Kang Hae-ah became accustomed to being known as someone who was not him. Thanks to that, today,

“So, how do you rewind this….”

Kang Hae-ah had to press the buttons on the video player, which he had never used properly, this way and that.

“Hae-ah. Is it not working? Do you want me to help you?”

Tae-rim-ssi asked over his shoulder, and

“No! I found it.”

Kang Hae-ah pressed the fast forward button. The scene of receiving gifts from the guests passed, the scene with the chairman and his older sister passed, and when Kang Hae-ah pressed the ‘play’ button in the scene where his parents-in-law and Kang Hae-ah were standing, the screen slowed down.

As Kang Hae-ah watched himself standing straight with a nervous smile, he slowly retreated and sat on the floor. The scene of Si Eun-cheol and Kang Hae-ah talking was filmed, but the sound of the conversation was not included. The screen slowly captured the guests for a moment, and then,

―Thank you for joining us for this joyous occasion today.

It returned to Kang Hae-ah and Tae-rim-ssi, who were standing in front of a long table.

“…….”

At that moment, Kang Hae-ah froze like a stone. The thoughts that had been spreading out hardened, and the lips that had been parted closed tightly.

In the large television screen, Tae-rim-ssi, who was standing with his arm around Kang Hae-ah’s arm, was smiling. Without any dark emotions or angry expressions, he was looking down at Kang Hae-ah with a smile…. The heavy pressure of his hand pressing down on Kang Hae-ah’s arm and the dark eyes that were staring straight through him remained in his mind, but Cheon Tae-rim in the screen was not like that.

He was purely a newlywed enjoying a happy day. He gently embraced Kang Hae-ah’s arm and accompanied him with a smiling face, with affectionate goodwill in his eyes.

Kang Hae-ah could only look up at the television blankly and could not move. Blue sky and green light poured out of the screen and covered Kang Hae-ah’s face.

Behind him, Tae-rim-ssi was saying something, admiring the clothes and weather that Kang Hae-ah had worn that day. Even as Kang Hae-ah listened to his voice, which was whispering as if he was enjoying himself, he couldn’t turn around. Kang Hae-ah was afraid that if he turned his face now, he would see the cold face that despised him again. Kang Hae-ah was afraid that that face was not true. Kang Hae-ah was afraid that he was crazy… he didn’t have the courage to confirm the truth.

To Be Continued In Vol 3

P.S.