By Zephyria Saturday, May 2, 20XX
Me
I bought the ointment and put it in the mailbox. Apply the medicine.
11:47 AM
Did you check the ointment?
1:13 PM
Why aren’t you replying?
1:13 PM
Sunday, May 3, 20XX
Me
?
8:03 AM
Why are you reading my messages and not replying?
8:03 AM
Pick up the phone.
12:32 PM
* * *
12:35 PM
I don’t want to do my homework.
3:21 PM
Let’s meet up and do it together.
3:22 PM
Are you crazy?
5:09 PM
Monday, May 4, 20XX
Me
What time does class end today?
8:00 AM
What kind of manners did you learn that teaches you to read messages and ignore them?
1
11:03 AM
Ki Young-han clutched his mobile phone, his body trembling. Uncontrollable anger swirled around him. Yoon Ye-jun had read the messages he sent and ignored them, and of course, he didn’t answer his calls.
He knew his home address precisely, so he briefly considered going over there regardless, but there was no reason to. Why would he go all the way there just because someone didn’t reply to a message?
But that was just his thought. Ki Young-han kept looking at his mobile phone even during class. He paid no attention to the professor droning on about different types of federal systems. He rested his chin on one hand, fiddled with the corner of his textbook with the other, then checked his flipped-over mobile phone before flipping it back over. He couldn’t concentrate on the class at all. “This is pathetic…” he muttered to himself.
Why isn’t he replying?
Yoon Ye-jun, who had been contacting him, always replied to his questions, even if his replies were late. But now, after reading his messages and completely shutting him out, it bothered him even more. He hadn’t exactly lived his life paying much attention to human relationships, so he felt even more at a loss. If only he knew the reason, he could confront him, but since he didn’t, his thoughts spiraled.
Could something have happened?
His thoughts belatedly shifted in that direction. Yoon Ye-jun was slender and thin, making him an easy target for trouble. He had always thought Yoon Ye-jun had a fierce look, but when he smiled, it wasn’t quite like that. Also, people can be surprisingly naive, so there was a high probability he’d had his phone and wallet stolen, and his body dumped somewhere far away.
This won’t do. Anger aside, he should go check just in case. He decided not to go all the way to his door, just to the front of the building. If the ointment was still in the mailbox, something was wrong, and if it wasn’t, then he was just…
“…….”
Should I just not go?
“Let’s take about a 10-minute break and then continue. It’s killing me with this heat.”
With the professor’s words from the podium, a short break arrived. This was the problem with back-to-back lectures. Both students and professors were exhausted. They hadn’t even reached the threshold of summer yet. It would undoubtedly get hotter. Even with the air conditioner blasting, the air itself would be humid and sluggish. It was fine for now, but the future was the issue.
Is the heat the problem? Ki Young-han pulled up one corner of his lips and rubbed his face with his hands. Pathetic. Shitty. Infuriating. There was no other way to express his current feelings.
“Young-han.”
At the voice calling his name, Ki Young-han turned his gaze sideways. Lee Yun-hak, sitting in the back row, made a V with his fingers. It was a signal to go for a smoke. Ki Young-han got up obediently. He was, in a crude sense, craving a cigarette. He vaguely knew the reason but didn’t want to admit it.
Ki Young-han stood in the smoking area, smoking a cigarette. One wasn’t enough, so he smoked two in a row. He couldn’t understand why Yoon Ye-jun wasn’t replying. It wasn’t like Yoon Ye-jun hadn’t done anything to him that would make him lose interest, like getting drunk and causing a scene. Of course, he could see him since they had the same class on Thursday, but he wanted to know why he was ignoring his messages.
Could it be…
“Lee Yun-hak.”
“Huh?”
Lee Yun-hak let out a dazed voice. Ki Young-han wet his lips. He threw the cigarette he was smoking into the ashtray. His mouth felt dry and rough, as if he were thirsty, though he wasn’t.
“It’s not about me, but…”
When he said this, the probability of it being about himself was close to 99.8%, but he couldn’t help it.
“What do you call it when two people drink all night and then don’t contact each other the next day?”
“…….”
He couldn’t say they had sex openly outside, so he spoke indirectly. He felt pathetic even after saying it, so Ki Young-han held his breath. Lee Yun-hak, who had been staring blankly, slowly furrowed his brow.
“Did you get a girlfriend?”
“Don’t be an idiot.”
Ki Young-han snapped back. Lee Yun-hak added follow-up questions.
“Did you have physical contact?”
Ki Young-han’s face, which had looked like he was about to confront someone, became shadowed. He tilted his head and scratched his neck. He didn’t particularly like Lee Yun-hak’s manner of questioning him as if he were a cool detective, but he couldn’t help it. Would he ask his own brother about this? Or search on a portal site? The truth was, he wanted to ask the person involved the most, but since he wasn’t getting a reply, he had no choice.
Ki Young-han nodded instead of answering. He couldn’t meet Lee Yun-hak’s eyes. He felt humiliated that he was seeking relationship advice from this guy.
“Did you force yourself on them when they said no?”
“I don’t think so.”
Did he? Ki Young-han furrowed his brow to recall the past few days. But as far as he remembered, Yoon Ye-jun had never refused. It seemed like he hadn’t. Yoon Ye-jun had initiated, climbing on top of him and even kissing him deeply, and after that, it had proceeded quite naturally.
“…….”
But why was that person so familiar with it?
Ki Young-han touched his brow with his fingers. An inexplicable sense of unease settled in his body like a lump.
Did he have experience? If so, with whom?
He had just smoked, but a sense of discomfort remained on his fingertips, like withdrawal symptoms.
Ki Young-han scowled to himself, clenched and unclenched his fists, and pursed his lips in his discomfort. After a moment of silence, Lee Yun-hak spoke.
“Hey, Young-han. Then what would it be?”
He snapped his thumb and middle finger together as if delivering a clear answer. Snap.
“They probably lost interest because you’re so bad at it.”
Ki Young-han’s face turned pale.
It felt like May. A greenish-blue hue settled, and students buzzed with energy.
Yoon Ye-jun boarded the elevator, holding a stack of printouts. He pressed the button for the 6th floor, where the professor’s office was, and waited. The arrows on the elevator panel climbed steadily, the numbers changing one by one. Fortunately, since it was class time, no one else was riding the elevator.
Soon, the elevator stopped on the 6th floor, and the doors opened. Yoon Ye-jun stepped out and glanced at the large glass window on the wall next to the elevator. It was truly May.
While others were laughing and enjoying the campus, Yoon Ye-jun was troubled. The printouts he had to deliver to Kim Jae-ui were a handful, but the biggest problem was Ki Young-han, who kept sending him messages.
Since when did he become so familiar as to ask if he wanted to do homework together? It was ridiculous. Regardless, he hadn’t replied.
Deciding to draw a line with Ki Young-han, his mind felt at ease. He just had to send messages as usual. He treated Ki Young-han’s messages like app notifications. Did he even remember what he had said? He was using the ointment well. Though it was humiliating to reach behind himself and apply medicine to the torn wound.
Yoon Ye-jun walked slowly.
Kim Jae-ui’s location was next to the professor’s office, in a disused research room. It was also sometimes used as a meeting room by students writing papers, and Kim Jae-ui was likely working on a book there.
Yoon Ye-jun arrived at the door and knocked twice. “Come in,” Kim Jae-ui’s voice replied.
When he turned the doorknob, it was quite well-decorated like an office. Kim Jae-ui was working on his laptop. He looked up from the laptop with a blank expression and turned his head towards Yoon Ye-jun standing at the doorway. He slightly lifted the corners of his mouth and spoke familiarly.
“Did you bring it?”
“Yes.”
“You finished it faster than I thought.”
Because I wanted to finish quickly. Yoon Ye-jun handed over the printouts he was holding.
“I’ve checked it all for now. I’ve also sent the files by email.”
“Ah, yes. You worked hard. The money should be transferred to the account number you provided within this week.”
“Yes.”
The work Yoon Ye-jun was assigned wasn’t difficult, as the professor had said. Occasionally, unfamiliar words appeared, but they were easily found with an internet search. After handing over the printouts and finishing his task, Yoon Ye-jun bowed his head to leave. Now, all he had to do was go back. Then, until the next document arrived, his daily life would remain unchanged.
“The professor wants to have lunch together. Do you want to join?”
Kim Jae-ui asked, closing his laptop. Yoon Ye-jun was slightly taken aback because he hadn’t expected a lunch invitation, but he quickly maintained his usual expression.
“I have class this afternoon. I need to stop by home to get my textbook.”
“Are you going down now? I’m going down now too, so let’s go together.”
Yoon Ye-jun didn’t say anything, but Kim Jae-ui leisurely stood up. With the sound of the chair scraping, Kim Jae-ui muttered, “I’m tired.” The two naturally left the research room together. They didn’t talk much while waiting for the elevator. Yoon Ye-jun looked out the window, just as he had when he first got off the elevator.
“Why does the school keep changing?”
Kim Jae-ui was reminiscing again. Yoon Ye-jun didn’t reply. Would only the school change? Nothing remained the same. Everything changed. Even people’s feelings. If it were in the past, he would have asked, “Hyung, have you eaten?” before Kim Jae-ui even suggested lunch. But now, he wasn’t particularly curious whether Kim Jae-ui ate or starved.
“Did you eat lunch?”
Kim Jae-ui asked after they got into the elevator together. Yoon Ye-jun hadn’t eaten lunch, but fearing he would offer lunch again, he replied briefly, “Yes.” The numbers on the panel dropped one by one. With a ding, it stopped on the 1st floor. The two of them got out of the elevator side by side.
“The professor is waiting for us at the place we ate last time.”
“Ah, really?”
“Yeah. The professor really likes you, Ye-jun. You should go say hello…”
Kim Jae-ui couldn’t finish his sentence. He stopped in his tracks. Yoon Ye-jun also stopped abruptly. Kim Jae-ui glanced back sideways. Tap, tap, tap, tap, tap! The sound of running footsteps approached them. Yoon Ye-jun, sensing the presence, also turned his head.
“…….”
The owner of the footsteps was Ki Young-han. He was running towards them with a stern expression.
Why did we have to meet here of all places? Yoon Ye-jun unconsciously frowned slightly. Not as openly as Ki Young-han, but still.
However, Ki Young-han, not sensing Yoon Ye-jun’s surprise, approached them in one stride. Yoon Ye-jun was flustered but maintained his original expression. He subtly shifted his gaze towards Kim Jae-ui.
Kim Jae-ui looked displeased, which was unlike him. He clearly didn’t like Ki Young-han. At that time, he had almost flushed red and raised his voice. Kim Jae-ui hated showing a bad side to others the most, and he also disliked people who did.
Ki Young-han, who had approached, stood before Yoon Ye-jun and Kim Jae-ui. The three of them faced each other as if in a three-way confrontation. He thought it would be fine if he just parted ways with Kim Jae-ui, but now he had to run into Ki Young-han.
Yoon Ye-jun bit his lip and exhaled a long breath through his nose. It was a sigh.
Ki Young-han raised his voice.
“What are you trying to do?”
That’s what I want to say, you bastard.
Yoon Ye-jun cursed inwardly, watching Ki Young-han, who was snapping at him without any regard for the surrounding eyes.
Unlike Ki Young-han, who didn’t consider others and only said what he wanted, Yoon Ye-jun possessed social skills. Even if the other person was Kim Jae-ui. Yoon Ye-jun turned to Kim Jae-ui and gave an awkward smile.
“You should go ahead.”
He was worried that if Ki Young-han acted up in front of Kim Jae-ui like last time, it would only make him uncomfortable.
Kim Jae-ui looked back and forth between Yoon Ye-jun and Ki Young-han. Sensing that the situation was serious, he nodded. Then he slowly raised his arm. He familiarly put it around Yoon Ye-jun’s shoulder. Yoon Ye-jun looked down at the hand around his shoulder with cold eyes.
“I’ll go ahead. Contact me, Ye-jun.”
Kim Jae-ui patted Yoon Ye-jun’s shoulder with his arm and said goodbye.
“See you again.”
He also politely addressed Ki Young-han.
However, Ki Young-han completely ignored Kim Jae-ui’s words. He snorted and left without even looking at Kim Jae-ui. Yoon Ye-jun scanned Ki Young-han up and down with an annoyed expression. Ki Young-han glared at Yoon Ye-jun with eyes so fierce they seemed ready to breathe fire.
Yoon Ye-jun instinctively felt it. If he exchanged words with Ki Young-han here, he would be the one to get screwed. He couldn’t gauge what explosive words that mouth, which couldn’t read the situation or atmosphere, might utter.
Ki Young-han twisted his lips. His eyes, which he always thought were venomous, were sharper than usual. It was as if he carried blades.
Yoon Ye-jun felt cold sweat trickle down his spine. Shifting his gaze away from Ki Young-han, he slowly surveyed his surroundings. The place they were standing was near the lobby of the College of Social Sciences building. It was the area with the highest foot traffic in the building.
“…….”
Yoon Ye-jun had to save himself first. So, he grabbed Ki Young-han’s wrist. Ki Young-han’s gaze, which had been fixed on Yoon Ye-jun, dropped. Ki Young-han looked down at his wrist, which Yoon Ye-jun was holding. And he muttered as if to himself.
“…What is it.”
Yoon Ye-jun ignored Ki Young-han’s words and just started walking. He held Ki Young-han’s wrist tightly, like a noose.
Ki Young-han looked at Yoon Ye-jun’s back, shoulders, and outstretched arms as he tried to drag him away. Yoon Ye-jun was significantly smaller than him. His round head and the shiny brown hair catching the light looked lustrous. For now, he obediently matched his pace.
Even as he was being dragged along, Ki Young-han saw his own hand, held so tightly by Yoon Ye-jun that it trembled. His strength was secondary; it was annoying. Yoon Ye-jun, who hadn’t said a word when he was talking familiarly with another man and that man put his arm around his shoulder, had shown a look of panic the moment he appeared and tried to drag him to a secluded place. But what was more puzzling was that with such weak strength, which he could normally shake off, he couldn’t shake it off for some reason.
“Whatever it is, let’s go to a quiet place and talk.”
“…….”
Ki Young-han decided to put his questions aside for now. Instead, as he was dragged down the stairs by Yoon Ye-jun, he racked his brain to find the source of his displeasure. Why was it that man, who acted so refined, bothered him so much among all the other people?
And just as they were leaving the building, a buried memory surfaced belatedly.
The day of the Media and Information department’s retreat. There was a moment when Yoon Ye-jun seemed particularly shaken. He had been drinking then, and he hadn’t paid much attention to others, so he had dismissed it without much thought.
“…….”
That man was there too.
“Ah, let go!”
Ki Young-han finally shook off Yoon Ye-jun’s hand. As expected, Yoon Ye-jun let go easily. Ki Young-han stood facing Yoon Ye-jun. He placed one hand on his hip and ran the other through his hair. Yoon Ye-jun let out a soft breath, watching his hair scatter through his fingers.
Ki Young-han rubbed his face with his palm, but the frustration didn’t dissipate. He exhaled deeply and looked around. It was a makeshift smoking area in a corner of the parking lot. There were no people, let alone cars. Most people parked underground. So, he had finally dragged him to a secluded place.
Ki Young-han was familiar with this place. It was the spot where he had brought fried chicken and yelled at Yoon Ye-jun to eat together, with a view of the second-floor terrace.
At that time, Yoon Ye-jun, leaning against the railing of the terrace, had smiled softly and said,
‘Young-han.’
‘Look up.’
When Ki Young-han looked up, Yoon Ye-jun was looking down at him. Ki Young-han ascended the stairs as if running. A spring breeze had picked up, and the weather was much cooler than it was now, so there was no reason to be hot, yet he ran until sweat soaked through. He didn’t know why, but he wanted to get to Yoon Ye-jun quickly. His heart was as full as his lungs. He had packaged everything as annoyance, but at the time, it was a rather enjoyable moment.
Annoyance is most annoying now.
It was unpleasant, and it was shitty.
The outline of the reason for his displeasure began to slowly take shape. Yoon Ye-jun didn’t have him in his sights at all. He had already been pushed aside by that man. The moment he admitted that, an unbearable rage surged.
“Tell me. Why are you like this.”
Yoon Ye-jun, who knew nothing and was as carefree as ever, quietly urged Ki Young-han on. Ki Young-han’s face contorted violently.
“Why are you doing this in a place with so many people? And, … what would your hyung think if he saw?”
Even coming this far, it’s still about hyung. I’m better than that old geezer. I lack nothing, neither in looks nor in height. Ki Young-han didn’t feel he received any special treatment for his appearance standing out compared to others, but he wasn’t complaining either. However, it was frustrating that it didn’t work on Yoon Ye-jun at all.
“Did you sleep with that bastard?”
Finally, Ki Young-han asked directly. Yoon Ye-jun’s face, which had been relatively calm, though tinged with annoyance, instantly filled with displeasure.
“What did you say?”
“I asked if you slept with that bastard.”
Yoon Ye-jun didn’t answer. No, he couldn’t. Ki Young-han felt a frustration so intense he wanted to beat his own chest. He wished it would burst open from a hard blow. He was being tossed about by a feeling he’d never experienced before. Yet, his nature remained the same. Just as a leaf, though fluttering freely in the wind, returns to its original direction of growth, so too did Ki Young-han.
“So that’s why you’re so skilled. I should have known, damn it.”
“…….”
“You said gay bastards were disgusting to their faces. It must have felt gross, hearing that about yourself.”
Yoon Ye-jun bit his lower lip hard.
Ki Young-han’s babbling mouth didn’t stop.
“Is that why you didn’t contact me? Because you finished after one go? You must have been thrilled. The bastard who called them disgusting, begging for a kiss from someone with the same thing, and then sucking him off thoroughly. Ah, it’s so shitty.”
Ki Young-han’s thoughts tangled chaotically in his head. Why should he suffer because of this person, when he lacked nothing? It’s possible not to be reachable. Wasn’t he acting like someone hurt, when he himself had ignored others’ calls every day? As he tried to sort out his muddled thoughts, he suddenly looked up.
“…….”
Yoon Ye-jun stood there with an expression Ki Young-han had never seen before. Ki Young-han’s thought process halted. Yoon Ye-jun’s eyes trembled violently. The muscles in his cheek twitched. He clenched his fists tightly. Yoon Ye-jun’s Adam’s apple bobbed.
‘What did I just say.’
Ki Young-han wanted to slap his own cheek. He had never regretted words he’d said to others, but now, it was clear he had made a slip of the tongue.
“So….”
Ki Young-han couldn’t decide whether to make an excuse or apologize. Still, he had to say he had made a mistake, so he was about to open his mouth.
“Bastard.”
Yoon Ye-jun’s curse came first.
“Did you sleep with that guy?”
“…….”
“No, I didn’t. I desperately wanted to, but I couldn’t. Do you know why? Because I liked him. It wasn’t a casual, one-night stand kind of feeling like you, just going with the mood.”
“…….”
“And what’s wrong with me liking men? In the end, you did everything with me too. You’re just as disgusting. Don’t act so noble.”
“What….”
“So stop meddling in my business. Like you said, it was just a one-night stand. I don’t care how you felt, but even when we were rolling around in my bed, I intended for it to be over once that night passed. You were the one who misunderstood, threw a fit, and contacted me. All this time!”
Having finished speaking, Yoon Ye-jun glanced once at Ki Young-han with wide, staring eyes, then turned and walked away. Ki Young-han stood there with a dumbfounded expression, watching Yoon Ye-jun’s retreating back.
Liked him?
Something writhed in his chest like a caterpillar, gnawing at something. Yoon Ye-jun’s hurt face, the voice that had lashed out at him, Yoon Ye-jun’s feelings. Ki Young-han couldn’t handle it.
In the end, it was all his fault, though.
Yoon Ye-jun, who had been walking steadily, suddenly turned back. Ki Young-han pressed his lips together and met Yoon Ye-jun’s gaze. Yoon Ye-jun approached him again. Ki Young-han stood still.
“I’m still angry, so let me hit you once.”
Yoon Ye-jun raised his fist. Then, he struck Ki Young-han’s shoulder. Thwack. A solid fist landed on Ki Young-han’s left shoulder. For Yoon Ye-jun, it seemed he had put some force into it, but Ki Young-han didn’t budge. Though there was pain.
“Don’t talk to me anymore.”
After saying that, Yoon Ye-jun continued on his way. Left alone, Ki Young-han finally lowered his head. Ruined. Everything was truly ruined.
Every time he closed his eyes, he returned to the corner of the parking lot.
‘Because I liked him. It wasn’t a casual, one-night stand kind of feeling like you, just going with the mood.’
‘I don’t care how you felt, but even when we were rolling around in my bed, I intended for it to be over once that night passed. You were the one who misunderstood, threw a fit, and contacted me. All this time!’
‘Don’t talk to me anymore.’
Yoon Ye-jun, whom he had faced, spoke those words with a cold expression and then, without a moment’s hesitation, turned his back. That scene repeated endlessly like a nightmare with no end.
“…….”
So Ki Young-han had to force his eyes open. The colors of his vision were muted, as if splashed with blue paint. The days grew warmer, turning towards early summer, and the sun lingered longer. All he could see was the ceiling, holding the color of dawn.
Ki Young-han tightly closed his eyes. What time did he fall asleep? He wanted to fall asleep as usual, but he couldn’t, so he tossed and turned in bed several times before finally drifting off, only to wake up shortly after.
He wished he could fall asleep again, but the thought of Yoon Ye-jun appearing in his dreams to lash out at him again made him feel disgusted. Honestly, he wasn’t exactly mild-mannered and often got into trouble, but the fight with Yoon Ye-jun felt more violent than usual.
Was it because of that hurt face? Or the bruise on his shoulder? He couldn’t pinpoint the exact reason, which made him feel even more miserable.
“Ah, fuck….”
Finally cursing under his breath, Ki Young-han turned over and buried his face in the pillow, lying prone. He gripped the corner of the pillow tightly with his hand, but his hand felt awkward, as if it couldn’t grasp it properly.
It felt hot. It felt stuffy.
Ki Young-han eventually lay on his back, looking at the ceiling again, and sat up abruptly, throwing off the t-shirt he was wearing. He couldn’t lie down again. He reached for the nightstand and picked up his Mobile phone, which was charging.
He had messages from people in his department whom he barely knew, but Ki Young-han didn’t check them. Instead, he scrolled down his Messenger until he found Yoon Ye-jun.
Yoon Ye-jun’s profile picture was still a forsythia. Why didn’t he change it, it was annoying. He grumbled and moved his fingers, but he couldn’t easily enter the chat window. The messages he had sent all weekend remained there. His frown twitched. He couldn’t even furrow his brow as usual; he rested his forehead on his hand and took a deep breath.
“What do you want me to do….”
Did he expect me to say, ‘I understand. I understand that you like men. I acknowledge your promiscuous sexual history and I understand.’? He admitted that he had spoken impulsively, but at that moment, he was so angry his hands were shaking.
‘It wasn’t a casual, one-night stand kind of feeling like you, just going with the mood.’
“Still, did you have to say it like that….”
Ki Young-han touched his shoulder, where Yoon Ye-jun had hit him. A dark bruise had already formed, less than a few hours later. It didn’t seem like much force was used, so the bruise was unexpected. Or perhaps, because he had been hit with words, the blow from his fist didn’t feel as painful.
Ki Young-han inhaled and held his breath. Then, as if making a decision, he pressed down with his thumb and entered the chat window. Yoon Ye-jun had read his last message, but hadn’t replied. Ki Young-han bit his lip and began to move his fingers.
Me
Let’s talk.
5:31 AM
After sending the message, he stared blankly. Ah. Ki Young-han let out a foolish sound. It was 5:31 AM. Sending a message to Yoon Ye-jun asking to talk before 6 AM? If it were right after what happened in the parking lot, maybe, but now, anyone would think he was drunk.
Am I crazy?
It would be better to meet him on Thursday and somehow get Yoon Ye-jun to talk, rather than sending such a pathetic message, Ki Young-han decided. He pressed down hard on the message he had sent. Fortunately, there was a delete button. He hadn’t even known such a function existed because he had never used it. Without hesitation, he deleted the message.
However.
Me
Deleted message.
5:31 AM
The trace remained. It was worse than if he had sent the message asking to talk.
“…….”
Ki Young-han finally turned off his Mobile phone quietly. Then, he lay down quietly in bed and pushed the Mobile phone under his pillow. What would Yoon Ye-jun think when he saw it tomorrow morning?
He couldn’t stand it anymore and kicked off the blanket he was covering himself with.
“Agh…!”
Ki Young-han’s voice echoed in the quiet dawn.
Political Science and International Relations, Ki Young-han
Deleted message.
5:31 AM
As soon as Yoon Ye-jun opened his eyes in the morning, he tilted his head at the message at the very top. However, as if there was nothing more to check, he exited the chat room. If it wasn’t a curse, it was probably some strange nonsense.
Regardless of what Ki Young-han thought, it was a somewhat embarrassing moment for Yoon Ye-jun. Honestly, he had been too emotional. Generally, he maintained a stable personality with few fluctuations, and through various part-time jobs, he had met many people he didn’t want to associate with, so he could have endured it if he tried. In the end, he didn’t.
Ki Young-han, who had been spouting things like “disgusting” from the beginning, why did he act so impulsively? He should have just avoided him completely.
“…….”
Did he have even a shred of expectation?
Anyway, Ki Young-han was someone who would naturally drift away after this semester, so he wished he had just waited for that time. He was someone he would see at school on Thursday, so he wished he had just endured it a little. Was it the first time Ki Young-han had spoken carelessly and done as he pleased?
Yoon Ye-jun looked at the chat room at the very top with a blank expression, then put down his Mobile phone. But it was already in the past, there was nothing he could do. He knew it would end up like this anyway, and he had approached Ki Young-han in the first place wanting to mess with him.
“Well, can’t be helped….”
Why do the days you wish wouldn’t come arrive so quickly?
Ki Young-han stood in front of a cafe near the General Education Building. After the incident with Yoon Ye-jun, his life had become a mess. Whenever he had a moment, Yoon Ye-jun’s hurt face would come to mind. While eating, while listening to lectures, while washing, even when closing his eyes to sleep.
Except for a brief nap, he hadn’t slept deeply, and fatigue weighed on his shoulders. Whenever he finally managed to fall asleep, Yoon Ye-jun would appear and scold him. And in his dreams, Yoon Ye-jun even shed tears, causing Ki Young-han to wake up abruptly as if he had been sleep-paralyzed.
Ki Young-han had arrived at a clear conclusion about this feeling: guilt. Even on the day his younger brother hit him on the head, he was told not to meddle, but this was more agonizing than that. Honestly, his younger brother was within his grasp, so getting angry and making up was as easy as flipping a palm, but Yoon Ye-jun was a type of person he had never encountered before, which made things difficult.
It would have been better if Yoon Ye-jun were simpler. If Yoon Ye-jun had a lover, he could have sugar-coated it by saying, ‘I understand. You’re in a messy love.’….
Ki Young-han recalled the face of the man who had patted Yoon Ye-jun’s shoulder as if to embrace him. At first, he had a vague, unremarkable appearance and lacked presence, but after seeing him a few times, he became familiar enough that he could picture his face even when not looking at him.
The thought of Yoon Ye-jun, who had always been so cold to him, smiling sweetly at that man made his stomach churn. No. He retracted the hypothetical about having a lover. Yoon Ye-jun would surely be more amiable and affectionate with a lover than he was with me….
“Customer?”
Lost in deep thought, Ki Young-han snapped back to attention at a voice calling him from nearby. He quickly looked up to see a staff member staring at him.
“I’ll take your order.”
Ki Young-han placed his hands on the counter. He tapped his fingers, unable to hide his anxiety.
“One iced americano, please.”
“One iced americano.”
“And one of that, mint chocolate, please.”
It was a bitter, sharp drink that he found unpleasant and didn’t understand why anyone would drink, but Yoon Ye-jun seemed to like it. The last time he had thrown up on him, he had apologized while buying him this. Ki Young-han also decided to apologize while giving him this.
He admitted he had made a slip of the tongue and didn’t mean to say all that, but he intended to say he was sorry. Would giving him this actually resolve his anger? Would he even acknowledge him?
Ki Young-han let out a shallow sigh as he watched the machine dispensing the coffee concentrate.
Ki Young-han deliberately entered the lecture hall late. He was worried that Yoon Ye-jun might avoid him and sit elsewhere. As he entered with sharp eyes a minute or two before the lecture began, he realized there was no need to worry. Yoon Ye-jun was sitting in his usual seat. Looking as he always did.
Ultimately, since he had spoken so poorly, he had to bear whatever consequences came his way. Ki Young-han, with his hollow eyes, tried to act as if nothing was wrong and approached Yoon Ye-jun’s side. In one hand, he held the americano he would drink, and in the other, a mint chocolate piled high with whipped cream.
He felt like his sugar levels were dropping, maybe he should have bought some chocolate.
Being near Yoon Ye-jun made him feel like his blood sugar was rapidly decreasing. He pulled out a chair and sat beside him, but Yoon Ye-jun only looked at his Mobile phone without even glancing at him. He didn’t greet him with “Young-han, hello” like he used to.
“Tsk….”
Ki Young-han, with many things to feel guilty about, glanced at Yoon Ye-jun and then pushed the mint chocolate, which was on his side, towards Yoon Ye-jun. Yoon Ye-jun, who had been looking at his Mobile phone without a care, peeked sideways.
“…….”
Still, he said nothing. Wouldn’t he at least ask, out of courtesy, what this was? But he had no right to talk about courtesy, having messed things up himself.
Finally, Ki Young-han spoke first.
“Um… I have something to say.”
Yoon Ye-jun listened silently. Perhaps the gesture of giving him a drink had some effect, as he picked up the drink he had pushed towards him and put the straw to his lips. Seeing that, Ki Young-han gained a little confidence. Perhaps the anger had subsided a little just by accepting and drinking the beverage. The knot in his heart, like indigestion, slowly began to ease.
“I’m s….”
The words didn’t come out easily. Ki Young-han organized the words he would say to Yoon Ye-jun in his head.
I’m sorry. I misspoke that day. I didn’t need to say all that; I was angry because you weren’t contacting me and seemed to be getting along well with that bastard. But why was I angry?
“I’m s….”
I’m sorry. I have nothing to say. I’ll listen well from now on. I can’t do everything you say, but I’ll try.
However, a different sentence came out of his mouth than the one he had been rehearsing.
“Aren’t you sorry?”
“…….”
“Aren’t you sorry to me? I have a dark bruise here, you know.”
Ki Young-han touched his shoulder where Yoon Ye-jun had hit him.
I’m going to die.
Deciding this.
Yoon Ye-jun slowly removed the straw from his lips. He thought Ki Young-han, who had brought him a drink, was finally going to apologize. After all, he had seen Ki Young-han act like this for more than a day, and honestly, his anger had gradually subsided over time.
Also, even if he didn’t want to see him, he would have to see him a few more times for class, and he didn’t want to get embarrassed, so he had intended to let it go if he apologized. But what Ki Young-han actually said was outrageous. It exceeded his expectations.
Yoon Ye-jun passed the takeout cup in his hand to Ki Young-han. He wanted to open the lid and pour it out, but he held back with the last shred of his reason. He didn’t want to become the same kind of person.
“You drink it.”
“…….”
“And, didn’t you hear me when I told you not to act familiar?”
Sweetness lingered in Yoon Ye-jun’s mouth. The current situation was just like this mint chocolate. He understood why people hated it. It was bitter, like toothpaste. In conclusion, it had ruined his mood.
“Ah, damn it….”
Ki Young-han cursed lowly beside him. He seemed to have something to say, his lips twitching.
“I know. Ah….”
“…….”
“Just, ah.”
Ki Young-han couldn’t easily open his mouth. Yoon Ye-jun withdrew his half-lidded eyes that had been directed at Ki Young-han. He stared at the empty podium, and just then, the professor walked in. Only then did the assignment come back to him. Of course, he had done it, but the problem was Ki Young-han.
Come to think of it, did he do his assignment? He seemed to recall messages sent over the weekend about not wanting to do the assignment, wanting to meet up to do it, or something like that. But then again, the report was an individual assignment, so if he didn’t do it, it was his own loss.
While lost in thought for a moment, Ki Young-han broke through his distractions. He lowered his voice and asked,
“What are we going to do about meeting tomorrow?”
“I’ll handle it.”
“Handle what?”
Ki Young-han, who had just been pretending to look apologetic, now scratched his neck and muttered as if threatening him. What was wrong with this guy’s personality? Yoon Ye-jun turned his body away from Ki Young-han with a defiant look. The professor called out names one by one for attendance. Ki Young-han had already answered, and Yoon Ye-jun, belatedly called by the professor, replied, “Yes.”
“It’s damn hard to hear your voice.”
Ki Young-han grumbled beside him.
In the end, an apology was out of the question. Ki Young-han was experiencing the worst trial of his life. Like pouring oil on a fire, the intensity only grew. The thought that it might have worked out if he had just said “I’m sorry” while handing over the drink remained a foregone conclusion. It was already too late. How could you pick up spilled water?
Ki Young-han just sat on the bench next to the playground in the apartment complex, which had become a smoking area, and smoked cigarettes late into the night. If he went home and was alone, he would end up thinking of Yoon Ye-jun again, so it was better to spend time outside.
He considered going to his parents’ house since he had no classes on Friday, but then he thought Yoon Ye-jun might change his mind and ask to meet on Friday, which would be a hassle, so he couldn’t do that either. Ki Young-han looked at the 500ml beer can placed quietly beside him. He was barely finishing one can.
What do you want me to do?
With an annoyed face, he stared at the floor, then grabbed his hair as if to tousle it. “Ah!” he exclaimed, lifting his head.
Should I try contacting him again? He’d had some drinks. He felt he could apologize properly. With a newfound, commendable courage, he took a deep breath and pulled out his mobile phone.
Yoon Ye-jun’s name was in the notification window.
“…….”
Ki Young-han fumbled and quickly moved his hand to enter the chat room.
Yoon Ye-jun Performance communication materials.pptx
7:40 PM
All that was sent was a presentation file. Ki Young-han, with a defiant look, clicked on the file. It contained photos of meals, with no indication of who he had gone with. It was detailed, as if he had actually met them, including the times they met and parted.
‘I’ll handle it.’
Was this how you were going to do it when you said you’d do it alone?
“Huh….”
Ki Young-han let out a breath of emptiness. Then, without hesitation, he called Yoon Ye-jun.
Ring, ring….
Only a monotonous connection sound echoed, without a ringtone. However, Yoon Ye-jun did not answer the call. Instead, after the connection was cut off, another message came in.
Yoon Ye-jun
If you need anything, message me.
7:52 PM
Yoon Ye-jun was deliberately not answering his call. Ki Young-han, leaving his face contorted with emotion as it was, pressed down with his fingertips on the keypad.
Me
Answer the phone.
7:52 PM
And he waited for a reply.
Yoon Ye-jun
If possible, message me. Don’t contact me if it’s pointless.
7:54 PM
Can a person really be like this? Being cold has its limits. However, Ki Young-han, given what he had done, couldn’t say anything more. This was driving him crazy. Frustrated, he repeatedly turned his mobile phone off and on.
If I run into him, I think I can apologize.
The reason Yoon Ye-jun and I need to meet. The group project for Performance Communication.
At that moment, a brilliant idea struck Ki Young-han. This was something he couldn’t not call about. Ki Young-han picked up the beer can next to him and jumped to his feet. Then, he threw the empty beer can into a nearby trash can and walked towards his home. His steps towards home were hurried.
“…….”
Yoon Ye-jun lay on his studio apartment bed, staring at the yellowish, stained ceiling. It was a rare day off, and he had no plans, nor did he want any, so he was just spending time lying in bed.
There was no more contact from Ki Young-han. Yoon Ye-jun took it in stride. He must have his pride, and after being told so much, he wouldn’t desperately try to contact him anymore. But why was he so desperate to contact him? He couldn’t quite understand.
Yoon Ye-jun spread his arms and legs wide. It was a narrow bed. On this bed, he and Ki Young-han had rolled around naked and done all sorts of things. Who would have thought that such a brat and he would have compatible chemistry? It was unbelievable, but he was an experienced party. He didn’t know if Ki Young-han was skilled, but he was good. Or maybe his tastes had become strange.
Still, what could he do? He had to forget now.
There was no benefit in recalling it. What was the difference between that and looking pathetic for not being able to forget a one-night stand? Moreover, it wasn’t a natural progression; their relationship had shattered like a thrown glass bottle.
From now on, he would just plan the schedule like today and write the report as if they had actually met. He should have done it this way from the beginning. It was a win-win situation. He wouldn’t have to worry unnecessarily, and neither Ki Young-han nor he would get hurt emotionally. There were less than 10 times left. If he could just endure until then…
Zzzzzzz.
A short vibration. Yoon Ye-jun picked up his mobile phone. He thought it would be Ki Young-han again, and indeed it was.
“…….”
As he looked at the message, a faint wrinkle appeared between Yoon Ye-jun’s brows. The sender was definitely Ki Young-han, but the message wasn’t meant for him.
Yoon Ye-jun sat up. He sat up straight on the bed and read the message.
Ki Young-han, Department of Political Science and International Relations
To Professor Lee Han-woo, Performance Communication.
Hello, Professor. This is Ki Young-han from the Department of Political Science and International Relations, student ID @@, taking your Performance Communication class.
Thank you for always dedicating yourself to guiding students’ academic development. Thanks to your Performance Communication lectures, I was able to cultivate my academic curiosity. I am always grateful.
The reason I am writing is to inform you about a matter concerning my group member, Yoon Ye-jun.
I understand that the group project for the Performance Communication class involves writing a report based on actual meetings, and that it is intended to foster understanding and relationship building with students from other departments whom you meet for a semester, rather than seniors or peers met within the department.
However, my group member, Yoon Ye-jun, is acting unilaterally, suggesting we write the report using a fabricated schedule without actually meeting. As a fellow group member, I am experiencing a bewildering situation. Furthermore, although we are in the same year, he acts coercively towards me, who is two years younger, under the guise of being a senior, which is quite awkward. I have attached evidence as a separate file, so please review it.
University is a gathering place for intellectuals with higher education, and it should maintain integrity and refinement, but I am going through difficult and trying times due to the actions of a student who does not uphold these standards. I apologize for bothering you during your busy schedule, but I request your review. Thank you for your always excellent lectures.
Sincerely, Ki Young-han.
8:18 PM
“Is this bastard crazy?”
Yoon Ye-jun read the message Ki Young-han sent three times with a dumbfounded expression. Putting aside how outrageous it was, he was being blackmailed with something that hadn’t even happened. Zzzzz. A photo arrived. It was the PPT file he had sent to Ki Young-han.
This crazy bastard…
Without any further consideration, Yoon Ye-jun called him immediately. Before the connection sound even finished, a gruff voice, as usual, answered the phone.
What is it.
“What are you doing?”
Doing what.
“What is that, sending it to the professor?”
Ah, it went to the wrong person.
“Don’t lie to me. You sent it on purpose.”
Ki Young-han didn’t reply. Silence was consent. Yoon Ye-jun was so dumbfounded he didn’t know what to say. If it were a leech, he could have torn it off, but he didn’t know how to deal with a human like this attached to him. Yoon Ye-jun ran his tongue over his molars.
“Why are you doing this to me?”
Let’s meet just once.
“Did you not learn your lesson after I beat you up last time?”
He said he even got a bruise. This was too much.
I’ll apologize when we meet.
“I have no business with you anymore. Hang up.”
I’m going to send the email.
“Do whatever you want!”
Yoon Ye-jun raised his voice and hung up the phone. He jabbed at the phone screen, ending the call. He covered both eyes with one hand, then, unable to calm down, he smacked his forehead a couple of times loudly. Then, with a sigh, he bit his lip. He narrowed his eyes like a flounder and stared at the dark phone screen.
He wouldn’t actually send it, would he…?
As a result, Ki Young-han did not send the email to the professor. Yoon Ye-jun received a message from Ki Young-han saying, “I didn’t send the email to the professor,” and thought, “He’s not that much of a psycho,” feeling relieved. But the problem came next.
Friday morning.
Ki Young-han, Department of Political Science and International Relations
I heard it’s closed.
9:27 AM
Ki Young-han sent a message along with the name of the restaurant Yoon Ye-jun had made into a presentation.
Looking at the message, Yoon Ye-jun slowly furrowed his brows. It was absurd. It was a restaurant he had visited just a few days ago with his classmates during the week. It wasn’t a famous place that was the talk of the town near school, but it had a steady stream of regulars, so it wasn’t the kind of place that would suddenly close.
Still, out of a sense of unease, Yoon Ye-jun searched the restaurant’s name on a portal site. There was a blog post uploaded just a few hours ago.
Me
I’m here.
10:19 AM
Yoon Ye-jun replied briefly. Honestly, he didn’t understand why this was happening. No matter how he thought about it, he couldn’t comprehend it. Ki Young-han’s rudeness and sensitivity were his usual personality, and he was famous on campus for it, so he could overlook it a hundred times over. But why was he still consistently contacting him? Where had the prim and proper, aloof person gone?
Yoon Ye-jun looked at the message, the read receipt disappearing as soon as he sent it, and tilted his head.
Ki Young-han, Department of Political Science and International Relations
Let’s have lunch together.
10:20 AM
He didn’t reply to this. However, Ki Young-han was persistent.
Ki Young-han, Department of Political Science and International Relations
I’m hungry.
10:24 AM
Are you going to your part-time job today?
10:29 AM
Are you going to your part-time job?
10:38 AM
* * *
10:52 AM
Isn’t this a bit much?
A premonition of continued contact until he replied washed over him. Yoon Ye-jun held his mobile phone and pondered. If he said no, he felt like Ki Young-han would keep contacting him, asking to meet. The fleeting judgment that it would be better to say he was busy and avoid further entanglement enveloped him.
Yoon Ye-jun bit his upper lip, pushed out only his lower lip, and sent a reply.
Me
Yeah.
10:54 AM
I’m busy, so I don’t have time to meet and talk with you.
10:55 AM
At first, he was the one who was busy and made people meet him early in the morning, bothering him. Now, seeing Ki Young-han acting like a dog chasing after its owner’s tail, he raised one corner of his mouth slightly.
Yoon Ye-jun looked at his mobile phone again. The number ‘1’ that should have been next to the message had already disappeared, but Ki Young-han no longer sent replies. He must have realized that being so blunt was not the way.
This is probably for the best. Yoon Ye-jun resolved to always treat Ki Young-han this way from now on. Because if he didn’t clearly refuse, he felt Ki Young-han would keep contacting him.
Yoon Ye-jun’s prediction was shattered, broken into pieces so small they couldn’t be reassembled.
The weather had warmed up considerably, and being a Friday evening, the beer house was packed. Ding dong. The bell to call an employee rang several times. The two employees working the floor were both busy, and Yoon Ye-jun was one of them.
With his body busy, he had no more time to spare for Ki Young-han. Yoon Ye-jun checked the number plate attached to the wall near the counter.
Table 13.
As he quickly turned his head, another employee nearby was already walking towards it. Clang, the bell on the entrance door rang simultaneously. Yoon Ye-jun turned his head to say, “Welcome.”
“…….”
There stood Ki Young-han.
Unbelievable. Truly.
Yoon Ye-jun was shocked. He was sure Ki Young-han had come because of him, but he had nothing to say. It wouldn’t make much difference if they started talking again. How many people fought while doing group projects?
Honestly, they weren’t even department mates, and their connection was only due to a group project. It was possible they wouldn’t get along, or their different approaches to the project could lead to raised voices. Such things were common. Of course, these two had done everything.
Ki Young-han was dressed casually. He wore a navy sweatshirt and a hat pulled down low, but anyone could tell it was Ki Young-han. He didn’t seem to be trying to hide, as his gaze immediately fell on Yoon Ye-jun. Yoon Ye-jun remained frozen in place, not even thinking of guiding him. Ki Young-han stood by the entrance, just staring intently at Yoon Ye-jun.
The reason he hadn’t contacted him anymore was that he had come to find him in person. Yoon Ye-jun gave an awkward smile. With a customer-service smile, he approached Ki Young-han, who was standing at the entrance.
“Are you alone?”
“Why the formal language.”
Ki Young-han acted as usual. With his sullen reaction, Yoon Ye-jun had no reason to maintain his expression.
“Why did you come here?”
“I came here to drink on my own, why?”
“How many people are with you?”
“Just me.”
Certainly, the beer house where Yoon Ye-jun worked was not the kind of place for drinking alone. It wasn’t a fancy bar for freshmen, graduates, or professors, but a place where anyone could comfortably walk in and drink. Usually, it was two or three people, or a group, but he had never seen a solo customer during his time working there.
“Can you drink alone here?”
“What’s stopping me?”
As always, he was not ordinary. Yoon Ye-jun, who had multiple part-time jobs and had been in Seoul for a while, was used to eating alone. But there were people who disliked doing things by themselves. His classmate, Kim Dong-hoon, for example, couldn’t even go to a convenience store alone near school.
“Ha….”
Yoon Ye-jun took a breath and led Ki Young-han. He guided Ki Young-han to a table for two. Ki Young-han flipped through the menu.
“Recommend something.”
“Just pick anything, really.”
“You’re unfriendly. Can I file a complaint?”
“…….”
Yoon Ye-jun looked at Ki Young-han with exasperated eyes. Ki Young-han, looking at the menu with a cocky and sullen face, glanced up.
“I’m kidding.”
It might have been a joke to him, but to Yoon Ye-jun, who had faced Ki Young-han, it didn’t feel like a joke at all. They weren’t in a position to joke around, but if it were a joke, wouldn’t he say it with a smile? With that characteristic sullen and gruff face, how could anyone take it as a joke?
“Give me dakgalbi and a bowl of rice.”
“You haven’t eaten?”
“You rejected me when I asked to eat.”
He’s blaming me again.
Yoon Ye-jun didn’t continue the conversation.
“And drinks?”
“Soju, please. And a Coke too.”
“Got it.”
Yoon Ye-jun marked the requested items on the paper receipt with a checkmark. Turning his back to Ki Young-han and heading to the counter, he looked back. Everyone else was laughing and chatting, but Ki Young-han sat alone, looking dejected. It was fortunate he didn’t care what others thought, but Yoon Ye-jun felt annoyed, thinking he was making him sit here at this hour because of him.
Does he not have any friends… Where did the friends he seemed close with go?
“Hyung, they say they’re coming to this festival.”
The younger colleague working with me, humming a K-pop song that was just spilling out from inside, stood close beside Yoon Ye-jun.
“Who is it?”
“Why don’t you know? It’s Namushojo.”
“Ah. They’re quite popular these days.”
“You don’t do anything at festivals anymore, do you?”
Yoon Ye-jun nodded. He was so uninterested that he didn’t even know when the festival, which could be considered the last event of the first semester, was happening. His friend Kim Dong-hoon would surely be jumping for joy about the festival and such.
“When is it?”
“Next week, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday.”
“Time really flies.”
“It really does. Ah, I wish the semester would end quickly.”
“Right, you said you were going down to your hometown during the break?”
“No. I was just planning to stay in Seoul.”
Yoon Ye-jun nudged the man’s shoulder. The man let out a giggle, then raised his head slightly before lowering his voice.
“Hyung, that person, isn’t that the person who came to the shop with you last time?”
Yoon Ye-jun nodded at the man’s question, referring to Ki Young-han. “Why did they come alone?” he asked, following up with a brief, “I don’t know. They probably want to drink.”
“Is that how they usually are?”
Only then did Yoon Ye-jun shift his gaze towards Ki Young-han. Ki Young-han was glaring at the two of them with eyes like fire. Even the boss didn’t look at them when they were slacking off like this. I wasn’t the only one who read the intensity in Ki Young-han’s eyes. Yoon Ye-jun awkwardly replied, “That’s just how their personality is.” Then he stroked his chin with his fingers.
“Could you bring some cheese rolled omelet to that table? They look like they’re going to eat.”
“Ah, yes. I’ll do that.”
“Yeah, thanks.”
Ding dong, the bell rang as numbers simultaneously appeared on the order screen. Table 4. Yoon Ye-jun watched the younger colleague walk leisurely into the kitchen, then naturally headed towards the table that was looking for him.
Ki Young-han ate well in a crowded bar. Honestly, soju was just an excuse; he ate the dakgalbi and rice silently without even opening the bottle. Yoon Ye-jun would occasionally glance at Ki Young-han while serving and clearing dishes. He ate surprisingly well, as if the food suited his taste.
Soon, the cheese rolled omelet arrived, and Yoon Ye-jun asked a colleague he worked with to take it, feeling it would be awkward to go himself. The colleague approached Ki Young-han with the dish. Ki Young-han, who had been eating diligently, looked up at the sound and the two had a brief conversation. Yoon Ye-jun was standing at the counter after finishing his calculation. Due to the noisy chatter and music, the conversation between the two was inaudible.
At that moment, Ki Young-han, who had been listening to the man’s words expressionlessly, scowled and looked at Yoon Ye-jun. The colleague looked the same. Yoon Ye-jun, who had been watching the two without realizing it, flinched.
I forgot to tell him not to mention that I was giving it to him…
It wasn’t a group order, and if a service menu item was given to a solo customer, there was really no one else to give it to besides him. Feeling like he was showing off unnecessarily, Yoon Ye-jun turned his gaze towards the entrance. He just scratched his ear, which felt itchy.
Ki Young-han waited until Yoon Ye-jun’s shift ended. When Yoon Ye-jun, who had finished his work and was preparing to leave after being replaced by the 12 o’clock shift worker, came out, Ki Young-han was talking to a female student.
The woman was considerably shorter than Ki Young-han. Ki Young-han looked down at her from an angle. He was tall enough to be noticeable even on campus, so he often looked down like that, not only at ordinary female students but also at most male students.
Was he asking for her number, or was she asking for his? However, Ki Young-han maintained an arrogant posture, which didn’t seem like he was asking for a number. He had his hands in his pockets and was standing with one leg, looking nonchalant. His expression was also the same carefree face he always had.
I’d forgotten because of all the trouble they caused, but he was handsome.
Soon, the woman turned around, her face flushed red and blue, even considering she might be drunk. With a deep frown, she walked away with large strides towards the inner part of the bar. Yoon Ye-jun felt awkward and glanced around. What did he say this time? Yoon Ye-jun looked once at the student passing by him, and once at Ki Young-han standing by the entrance with an indifferent expression, waiting for him.
Still, it felt a bit much to ask what he said without any pride. They had just argued loudly yesterday, so Yoon Ye-jun intended to walk past Ki Young-han. And he did.
However, Ki Young-han followed closely behind Yoon Ye-jun. Yoon Ye-jun ignored him and went into an alley to light a cigarette. Even as he lit it and took a puff, Ki Young-han stood facing Yoon Ye-jun, his hands behind his back, staring at him.
“Ki Young-han.”
Eventually, Yoon Ye-jun was the one who spoke first.
“Why did you come.”
“To apologize.”
“For what.”
“For calling it dirty.”
Having finished speaking, Ki Young-han tapped the toe of his shoe on the ground.
Yoon Ye-jun tried to speak as if it were nothing. His voice came out as usual. Calm and composed.
“If that’s how you think, why are you apologizing to me?”
“I didn’t know.”
“……”
“You stopped contacting me after the day we slept together. But you were hanging out well with someone else, so I got angry. I thought maybe you were just playing with me… something like that.”
After speaking, Ki Young-han rubbed his forehead with his palm. Then he wiped his eyes with the back of his hand and looked up.
“I’m sorry. And, what else. For the nonsense I spouted yesterday. And for threatening to email the professor.”
Yoon Ye-jun just stared at Ki Young-han. He had definitely wanted nothing more to do with Ki Young-han, but humans were so simple. His mood improved slightly just by hearing the word “sorry.”
Then, he suddenly became curious. Why would Ki Young-han, who seemed to have everything, get so angry when he didn’t contact him, swallow his pride to keep trying to contact him, and even come to his part-time job to wait for him, all over a petty squabble between guys?
They hadn’t shared a thousand years of friendship, nor did Yoon Ye-jun know Ki Young-han’s secrets. There was no reason for him to be obsessed. The Ki Young-han he had experienced so far was someone who would cut off contact arbitrarily, and if he had only sent materials like yesterday, he would have contacted the professor before Yoon Ye-jun.
“……”
Yoon Ye-jun watched the tip of his burning cigarette, organizing his thoughts. Why did Ki Young-han keep trying to get close to him?
When he looked up, Ki Young-han was staring at him. Yoon Ye-jun froze on the spot. His eyes met Ki Young-han’s, who was trying to make eye contact with him, his eyes wide open.
Because Ki Young-han was such a peculiar person, he had forgotten one thing. Naturally, the premise was missing.
Could it be…?
Yoon Ye-jun moistened his dry mouth with his tongue. He lightly licked his lower lip and blinked a couple of times.
Unlike the noisy world beyond the alley, in the alley filled only with silence and darkness, Yoon Ye-jun’s cautious voice slipped out.
“Do you… like me?”
The moment Yoon Ye-jun finished speaking, Ki Young-han’s usually clear eyes trembled violently. His eyes, filled with surprise, gazed at Yoon Ye-jun. Ki Young-han’s lips moved wordlessly, his face blank. Instinctively, he took a step back.
“What….”
Ki Young-han’s heart pounded violently, unable to find its rhythm. He felt like a sailboat on a stormy sea, unable to find its balance. He was like a weak blade of grass fluttering wildly in the wind. He could only be shaken as much as he was held and shaken.
Ki Young-han, who had been moving his lips, changed his mind. He hadn’t come to apologize to Yoon Ye-jun for this kind of thing, nor had he been constantly worried about him. Yoon Ye-jun was being strange. To have someone offer an apology and receive a response like, “Do you like me?” was an absurd leap.
“What kind of bullshit are you talking about?”
“……”
Yoon Ye-jun just listened to the words Ki Young-han was firing at him. Ki Young-han knew that this made him feel even more pathetic, yet he couldn’t take back the words pouring out.
“Are you crazy? Is something wrong with your head?”
Unlike Yoon Ye-jun, who didn’t even flinch, Ki Young-han looked like he was about to run away backward. Yoon Ye-jun brought the cigarette in his hand to his lips again. Ki Young-han’s gaze involuntarily drifted to Yoon Ye-jun’s lips. It was contradictory to think that it was his own lips, not a cigarette, touching them even in this situation. So he scowled deeply.
“I came all the way here to apologize. And you ask if I like you? Wow, your narcissism is really severe. Are all gay people like that? If you’re nice to them just a little, they think you like them?”
“Or not.”
Yoon Ye-jun replied casually. Ki Young-han felt his energy drain away. How could Yoon Ye-jun be so calm even in this situation? Ki Young-han tried to suppress the boiling anger inside him, but the aftermath was greater than he expected.
“Why do you think I like you?”
He finally asked. Yoon Ye-jun crushed the cigarette he was smoking and threw the butt into a large tin can that served as an ashtray. Ki Young-han desperately needed a cigarette too. But since he hadn’t brought one, he felt awkward asking to borrow one.
Fuck. A curse lingered on the edge of his lips. He wanted to go home, but he didn’t want to. His mind had been a mess lately.
“If I have to say, we weren’t close enough to have to reconcile just because we fought once. And you kept contacting me, and getting angry when I didn’t reply, it was strange.”
“……”
“And also, kissing and having sex because we were working on a group project. That’s not a normal thing, is it? But you suggested all of that.”
While Yoon Ye-jun spoke calmly, Ki Young-han’s face burned. It was fortunate that it was dark. Otherwise, his face would have been revealed to be burning. Ki Young-han touched his cheek with the back of his hand. It was indeed hot.
What Yoon Ye-jun said was something that he himself had also found strange. When he couldn’t get a reply, he felt frustrated, like something was stuck in his stomach. It was better to see his face, but when they met again, he would often snap and be irritable.
So he thought, ‘Ah, I really hate that guy,’ but when he was actually next to him, he wanted to kiss him, to touch him. If you think about it, even when he watched that gorilla-like porn, he thought Yoon Ye-jun was okay.
Could it be….
He felt like all the blood had drained from his body.
He wished he had never known.
The air surrounding them felt unfamiliar today. Ki Young-han bit his lip. When he looked up again, Yoon Ye-jun, though clearly looking up at him, seemed to be looking down. Ki Young-han scowled, feeling a different emotion than intimidation. He clenched his teeth and tightened his jaw.
“……”
Ki Young-han could no longer hesitate. His organs felt like they would burst. He was so anxious that he couldn’t keep his feet still, as if he needed to urinate. He hated Yoon Ye-jun looking at him. He didn’t know what expression he was making.
He took another step back. Then he turned around and left. Yoon Ye-jun didn’t call out to him. The noisy, bustling street came into full view. However, the thoughts bouncing around in his mind seemed louder than the students chattering away.
Ki Young-han, as if his hours of waiting were in vain, turned around and walked out into the bustling street. He headed home without looking back once. He quickened his pace as if running, leaving Yoon Ye-jun there. In truth, he was running away.
Ki Young-han should have been tired. He had spent time at a crowded beer house waiting for Yoon Ye-jun, who wouldn’t deal with him late into the night. He should have been tired, and he should have fallen asleep the moment he closed his eyes, but sleep didn’t come easily.
When he closed his eyes, Yoon Ye-jun’s voice from the alley echoed in his ears.
‘Do you… like me?’
Ki Young-han opened his tightly closed eyes. He stared at the ceiling, then turned onto his side, then rolled over in bed. The bedding felt hot, so he changed positions several times. He even took off his shirt and lay down out of frustration. Still, the unresolved discomfort lingered somewhere in his heart.
Eventually, he opened all the balcony doors in his bedroom and returned to his spot, but it was still the same. It was just an extension.
Staring blankly, he hugged his pillow, turned onto his side, and looked out the bright window. He felt resentful because he knew he was the only one who couldn’t sleep. He let his lower lip hang down. Yoon Ye-jun was probably sleeping soundly. The arrow of blame soon turned back to Yoon Ye-jun. Why did he have to say such a thing and make a person so restless?
“Haa….”
Finally, a sigh escaped his lips. He wouldn’t be able to sleep. It had been like this lately, and Yoon Ye-jun had finally pushed him to the peak of sleeplessness. Ever since meeting that guy, nothing had gone right.
* * *
Ki Young-han went to his parents’ house late on Saturday evening. While at home, Yoon Ye-jun’s words kept coming to mind, and his past mistakes replayed in his head.
When he lay in bed, he kicked the blankets, and even while watching TV, he would exclaim, “Agh.” Like he had in the alley with Yoon Ye-jun, he fled his rented room and returned to his parents’ house. He thought that at least at his parents’ house, he wouldn’t be alone and could distract himself.
He parked his car in the underground parking lot and was about to enter the house when he encountered a familiar yet strange, and if not strange, then quite familiar face.
“……”
“……”
“…Hello.”
Normally, he wouldn’t think of him at all, but he was impressed that he remembered the name of his brother’s boyfriend so perfectly. Limm Dae-han. He was wearing a school uniform, casually dressed without a vest, and he greeted Ki Young-han first.
Ki Young-han scanned Limm Dae-han and shifted his gaze to his side. He belatedly nodded and asked, “Where is Ki Young-hyun?”
“I sent him home.”
“What. He can’t go home by himself?”
Ki Young-han treated Limm Dae-han the same way he treated others. Ki Young-hyun and Limm Dae-han had been dating for quite some time. For Ki Young-han, who had only had short relationships that were barely worth calling dating, it was strange that they had been together for so long, and that he always picked him up and dropped him off. It must be because he liked him. Imagining Ki Young-hyun grinning beside him made him feel inexplicably uncomfortable. And curious.
“Then I’ll be going.”
Limm Dae-han gave Ki Young-han a perfunctory nod and started to walk away. What does it mean to like someone? Ki Young-han was awkward and clumsy with the emotions he was slowly beginning to recognize. After all, ever since experiencing Yoon Ye-jun, all his emotions felt foreign.
“Limm Dae-han.”
Ki Young-han called out to Limm Dae-han, who was just passing by him. Limm Dae-han stopped abruptly. Ki Young-han looked up. He was slightly taller than him. Ki Young-han, who had never seen anyone taller than him in his life, found Limm Dae-han’s presence unfamiliar.
He didn’t know how Ki Young-hyun could date someone like this. Even though he had been hit on the head for badmouthing Limm Dae-han to his brother, Ki Young-han maintained his prejudice. As always.
“Let’s talk for a bit.”
Limm Dae-han slightly furrowed his brow. It was an unlikely pairing for anyone to see. Still, he didn’t say, ‘I don’t want to,’ or ‘Why should I?’ Is it because he’s my lover’s brother? The world is full of things that are hard to understand. Why would being the lover’s brother be a reason?
He felt absurd for calling out to him, but still, Limm Dae-han was the only person he could talk to right now. He didn’t want to admit it, but he was the most pathetic person in this situation. Ki Young-han walked past Limm Dae-han and ahead of him.
The two went to a cafe near the house. Ki Young-han, feeling suffocated, gulped down the cold americano he ordered without using a straw. Limm Dae-han stirred the yuzu drink in front of him with a straw and fiddled with his mobile phone. He should have felt refreshed after drinking the cold coffee, but he didn’t. Ki Young-han couldn’t smooth out his furrowed expression.
Limm Dae-han, who had only been looking at his mobile phone, soon looked up. With his arms crossed, he said to Ki Young-han, who was sitting opposite him with a displeased look.
“Why are you with Ki Young-hyun?”
“…Did you tell him that?”
“It felt awkward to lie.”
Limm Dae-han wasn’t interested in Ki Young-han. That was natural. Ki Young-han thought it was for the best. He stared intently at Limm Dae-han, who was fiddling with his mobile phone. He wondered if it was that good. Noticing his gaze, Limm Dae-han put down the mobile phone he was holding.
“But what did you call me for?”
“Do you, like Ki Young-hyun?”
Before the words were even finished, Limm Dae-han’s ears turned a bright red. Ki Young-han clicked his tongue, then picked up his cup again. The scent of cold coffee lingered in his mouth.
“…I do.”
“How did you know that?”
Ki Young-han didn’t hesitate for a moment. He could feel Limm Dae-han’s gaze, which was watching him intently. Ki Young-han unnecessarily turned his gaze elsewhere.
What did it mean to ‘like’ someone? Ki Young-han mulled over the word. It was a difficult word for him. As he furrowed his brow, Limm Dae-han added,
“I want to keep being with them, and I want to do everything together.”
Ki Young-han thought back to his past self. The fundamental reason why he constantly contacted Yoon Ye-jun, why he unnecessarily focused his attention on Yoon Ye-jun, who was just minding his own business.
“I want to be special, different from others, and I want to be treated differently too. Differently than usual. Normally I wouldn’t, but I keep acting that way only in front of them.”
“……”
Ki Young-han chose silence. When Yoon Ye-jun was by his side, Ki Young-han always became strange. Even to his own awareness. His usual self was a person who only went in one direction. But when he thought of Yoon Ye-jun, or when he faced him, he would take a step in an odd direction.
“And how I realized I liked them is…”
“……”
“I’m not an idiot, why wouldn’t I know that? If you like someone, you like them.”
Having finished speaking, Limm Dae-han, despite his ears being bright red, grinned like a mischievous child. He was different from Ki Young-han, who always took the wrong path. At the playful grin, Ki Young-han felt an inexplicable irritation. It was suffocating, and his insides twisted.
He felt that if he admitted it, his troubled heart would become peaceful, like indigestion subsiding, but he didn’t want to admit it. Because…
‘I desperately wanted to sleep with them but couldn’t. Do you know why? Because I liked them. It wasn’t a fleeting feeling like yours, just going with the mood for a one-night stand.’
Because Yoon Ye-jun doesn’t like me.
Ki Young-han bit his lower lip, caught in a delayed adolescence and an unfair fever. It was irritating enough to be getting dating advice from a kid, but to be treated like an idiot made him even more furious. Regret followed shortly after.
If only I hadn’t gone to the beer house where Yoon Ye-jun worked yesterday… If I had just bombarded him with messages, regardless of whether Yoon Ye-jun ignored me. Then, I could have spent the semester maintaining this gloomy mood.
Of course, even if I went back, I would still have gone to find Yoon Ye-jun.
“Ah…”
“But why are you asking me that?”
Limm Dae-han asked. Ki Young-han pursed his lips, wetting them, and rubbed the moisture pooled at the bottom of his cup with his finger. Curses he couldn’t spit out, held in his mouth, swirled.
Ki Young-han soon rubbed his face with his palms.
“Oh.”
It wasn’t him making that vacant sound. At Ki Young-hyun’s presence, Ki Young-han looked up. Ki Young-hyun was looking past him. Ki Young-han also turned his head. Ki Young-hyun, huffing as if about to blow steam, was entering the cafe. Without hesitation, he approached the two.
“What are you two doing here?”
Ki Young-hyun asked. He looked back and forth between the two, then sat down next to Limm Dae-han.
“What’s he saying.”
Ki Young-han responded curtly. Ki Young-hyun tilted his head at the dejected tone, more so than usual. Limm Dae-han, not having received an answer, quietly looked at Ki Young-han, then shifted his gaze to Ki Young-hyun. “How did you get here?” he asked Ki Young-hyun, and Ki Young-hyun whispered, “There’s no other cafe nearby,” as they chatted.
Ki Young-han, who had been staring intently at the two, finally stood up.
“I’m leaving.”
“Hyung.”
Ki Young-hyun called out to Ki Young-han, who was walking away sluggishly. But Ki Young-han didn’t hear him. As always, he was a person whose own feelings were paramount. He walked out, not giving a second thought to his younger brother. The air, no longer spring but more like early summer, was thick and hot.
“……”
Ki Young-han stood blankly, watching the cars speeding by on the road.
There was nothing left to acknowledge. It was an emotion his heart and body had already recognized. But there was no thrill for this newly awakened feeling. Nor was there any expectation. What was the point of admitting he liked Yoon Ye-jun? Yoon Ye-jun didn’t even care about him.
This was the first moment he learned that the feeling of liking someone was inevitably accompanied by emptiness and helplessness.
Would anything change if I acknowledged my feelings?
Yet, Ki Young-han’s day changed drastically. He was completely swept away by a storm of emotions he had never felt before. He had gone to his parents’ house intending not to think of Yoon Ye-jun, but the feelings he encountered there only tormented and confused him further.
A heavy weight, like a large bundle on his shoulders, settled within him. In the end, despite being at home, nothing much changed; he thought of Yoon Ye-jun all night until dawn. Unable to bear this severe emotion himself, he finally returned to his rented room.
Still, he had to do what he had to do. Even if he couldn’t sleep, he had to do his work.
Ki Young-han wrote a report based on the presentation Yoon Ye-jun had sent and uploaded it to the portal. Next to his name on the list, sorted alphabetically, appeared the marker [Submitted]. Ki Young-han scanned down the list and naturally found Yoon Ye-jun’s name.
Yoon Ye-jun [Submitted]
Yoon Ye-jun had also finished the assignment long ago. Ki Young-han felt a pang of jealousy, imagining Yoon Ye-jun had spent his time peacefully, unlike himself who had gone through a chaotic period.
With a sullen face, Ki Young-han stared at Yoon Ye-jun’s name, then leaned back comfortably in his chair. He stretched his arm out, grabbed his Mobile phone lying carelessly on the desk, and picked it up. He opened Messenger and scrolled through his contacts. Naturally, he found Yoon Ye-jun.
“……”
Ki Young-han looked at Yoon Ye-jun’s profile with a skewed gaze. The profile picture, once adorned with yellow forsythia, was now empty. He knew it might have been taken down for no particular reason, but Ki Young-han’s mood became tangled, like a mess of tangled threads.
So that’s how it’s going to be. He decided not to care about Yoon Ye-jun anymore. After all, acknowledging his feelings wouldn’t change much. Yoon Ye-jun had never shown any interest in him, and he never would. Even if he apologized, their relationship wouldn’t progress as it had before. He had already blurted out his words, and he had run away from the scene at the end.
What if he had recognized his feelings for Yoon Ye-jun earlier? What if he had said, ‘I like you,’ at the moment Yoon Ye-jun asked, ‘Do you perhaps like me?’ He wondered for a moment, but soon realized it was a useless fantasy. What could he do even if it were true? He couldn’t go back now, and he was sure he would have just retorted defensively at that moment.
It would be easier on his heart to just think of his current feelings as a passing breeze. To bury them. To never let them show.
Ki Young-han was currently in the eye of a storm. If he left this place, he would be drenched by the wind and rain, and would move exactly as Yoon Ye-jun dictated. So, he would never let it show. Ki Young-han made up his mind firmly and put down the Mobile phone in his hand.
Ki Young-han’s resolution to give Yoon Ye-jun no attention, to not care about him, to not show his liking, did not last long. He sent a message to Yoon Ye-jun just a few hours later.
Me
What are you doing.
7:28 PM
Ki Young-han rationalized the reason for sending the message. Yoon Ye-jun had changed his profile picture shortly after taking it down. It was a bright sky. Anyone could see it was taken near the Social Sciences building. It was the weekend, did he have a reason to go to school? Or why was he at school? Who was he going to meet? Various questions tormented Ki Young-han, and he finally couldn’t hold back and asked.
However, he couldn’t send a confrontational message like ‘Why did you go to school?’ or ‘You’re living the good life, going to school on the weekend.’ So, he asked what he was doing as naturally as possible. He thought he had sent it quite simply and concisely. Yoon Ye-jun replied about 30 minutes later.
Yoon Ye-jun
Drinking.
7:49 PM
Why.
7:49 PM
The message was stiffer than usual. Ki Young-han stared intently at the message. He concentrated again, wondering if it was his imagination. He scrolled the screen with his thumb, checking the message, thinking if he had always sent messages like this, but it felt different from usual. If he called, he would know for sure if it was his imagination or if he was really sending messages stiffly.
Ki Young-han tapped the screen, hesitating.
Me
I want to call.
7:52 PM
Can I call?
7:53 PM
This reply came back surprisingly quickly.
Yoon Ye-jun
No, I’m with people from my project group right now.
7:55 PM
It doesn’t seem possible. If it’s important, leave a message.
7:56 PM
Ki Young-han, who had nothing to say and just wanted to hear his voice, could no longer reply and just stared blankly at the chat window.
So, this is the problem. It was like this even before he recognized his feelings. He was always the one who acted desperately. He was always the one who contacted first, asked to meet, asked to do things, and Yoon Ye-jun just sat there like royalty, only responding with ‘Okay,’ ‘Sure,’ ‘Got it.’ Someone like this would be hopeless at dating. He always acted so passively. Ki Young-han felt frustrated and annoyed.
Anyway, even though all relationships are like that, in romantic feelings, the dominant and subordinate parties are even clearer. He hated to admit it, but Ki Young-han was completely in the subordinate position. Even though he knew it frustrated him, he couldn’t just read the message and ignore it.
Is this how it usually is? Even though his head told him not to compromise his pride, his heart couldn’t ignore it, clinging to a sliver of hope.
Me
Until what time are you there?
8:02 PM
Let’s meet after you’re done.
8:03 PM
Ki Young-han felt like he could wait forever. Normally, he wouldn’t associate with people who were drinking, but Yoon Ye-jun seemed okay. He could wait until 2 or 3 AM. He had class the next day, but it was okay to lose some sleep. Ki Young-han thought to himself and waited for Yoon Ye-jun’s reply.
His heart, which had become soft and fluffy, tormented Ki Young-han. Ki Young-han, who always lived sharply and sensitively, felt his heart melting like an egg stirred in water.
Yoon Ye-jun
Young-han-ah.
8:05 PM
Don’t we have no reason to meet anymore?
8:06 PM
That is, until the reply came.
“Who is it?”
Yoon Ye-jun swallowed his soju, looking at the read message. His classmate, Kim Dong-hoon, who had been peeking beside him, asked. Yoon Ye-jun shook his head and put down his Mobile phone.
“Someone I did a group project with.”
“Ah. Them? Why are they contacting you even on the weekend?”
“Who is it?”
Besides Yoon Ye-jun and Kim Dong-hoon, there were a few others at the drinking party. They were from the Media and Information department’s student council. Yoon Ye-jun made eye contact with a student who was looking at him with sparkling eyes. He thought they wouldn’t understand even if he told them, but a rather casual answer came out of his mouth.
“They’re from Political Science, I think they said they were famous.”
“No way… Is it him? The handsome one. Ki… what was his name.”
“Ah, right. Ki Young-han.”
He had only talked about Ki Young-han with Kim Dong-hoon, so even if he was famous, it didn’t really resonate. But it seemed to be true in reality.
“But his personality is really weird. My part-time job senior dated him, and she barely managed to hold back from slapping him when they broke up.”
Does he really need to say that? Of course, the person who dated him, having faced his personality so directly, might have complaints, but the person relaying it to him was a bit much. Yoon Ye-jun said, “Really?” indifferently and let it go.
“Even on dates, it was always about him. Should I be saying this? Couples hold hands, right? But he apparently recoiled, saying, ‘Why hold hands when they’re sweaty?’”
“……”
“And his way of speaking is like, ‘Who are you to interfere? It’s none of your business. Mind your own,’ and so on. Honestly, who would date him? He’s just relying on his looks.”
Still, perhaps out of a mix of dislike and fondness, there was a connection. Yoon Ye-jun felt a little uncomfortable. Of course, their relationship had recently hit rock bottom, rock bottom, rock bottom, but… Ki Young-han should know this about me.
“I’m close with Ki Young-han.”
Yoon Ye-jun finally said something. It meant to stop them. And the man who was about to pour out more slander about Ki Young-han, having understood his words, shut his mouth. It would be awkward to badmouth someone he claimed to be close to. Yoon Ye-jun picked up the soju bottle placed beside him. Then he offered the bottle to the man.
“Your name is Woo-chan, right? Is the Festival preparation going well?”
Yoon Ye-jun offered the soju bottle, trying to lift the cooled atmosphere again. The man who took the glass tried to pour for him too, but Yoon Ye-jun stopped his hand and poured his own glass. He was uncomfortable with the age difference, using honorifics or calling people ‘hyungnim,’ but university drinking culture was perfect for creating petty old men.
Cheers. Two soju cups lightly clinked.
“Yes. But the hyungnims are helping, so I’m really relieved. This year’s freshmen…”
The slander had shifted direction, but it continued endlessly. He’s just that kind of person. Even after having drinks with him, strange rumors would surely circulate behind his back. He shouldn’t have come to a gathering like this in the first place, but it was because of Kim Dong-hoon. It was a difficult situation to refuse. He had consistently received offers from the student council, but he always refused because he didn’t want to waste time and emotions, and eventually, he ended up guarding a booth at the Festival.
What am I doing at 26?
Yoon Ye-jun, feeling inexplicably annoyed, poured a little more soju into the beer mug Kim Dong-hoon was using to mix a soju bomb. He felt a little better doing this.
“But don’t they not sell alcohol at the booths these days?”
“Ah, really. Hyung.”
The man rummaged through his bag and pulled out a lollipop.
“Do you know how much this costs at the booth?”
“How much?”
“Four thousand won.”
Yoon Ye-jun’s eyes widened at the fact that a lollipop, which costs at most 300 won at a convenience store, was marked up to 4,000 won at a school Festival. Blinking, he looked at the person sitting opposite him, unable to hide his surprise.
“But it comes with this as a service.”
The man picked up the empty soju bottle next to him and slammed it on the table.
“Are you using a trick? What if you get caught?”
“When Kim Seon-dal sold the Daedong River water, he wouldn’t have sold it with such an easy-going attitude, would he?”
Even with the eloquent mention of Kim Seon-dal, it ultimately meant they were trying to pull a fast one. Anyway, this school never changes. Yoon Ye-jun thought it would be better to be with Ki Young-han, who, despite his constant bickering, lived comfortably and followed the rules.
But Ki Young-han, who must have been completely fed up with him, why was he still contacting him? Making him care unnecessarily.
‘Do you perhaps like me?’
‘What kind of bullshit are you talking about?’
He recalled Ki Young-han’s words, spitting them out at him. Just as he had grown fond of Ki Young-han, both good and bad, Ki Young-han must have felt the same, making it difficult to cut ties at once. He had offered an apology, but Yoon Ye-jun had talked about liking him or not. Honestly, it was difficult to face Ki Young-han. That day, after returning home, he had buried his head and kicked his blankets so much. Ki Young-han, of course, didn’t know, so he probably thought it was okay to ask to meet so casually.
“……”
“What are you thinking about, Jun-ah?”
Kim Dong-hoon nudged Yoon Ye-jun, who was sitting with a serious expression, and asked.
“Nothing.”
Yoon Ye-jun replied rather lightly, then looked at his Mobile phone. The Mobile phone that was no longer receiving any messages.
The Festival hadn’t even started yet, but as it drew closer, the place was bustling. It was hard to tell when spring had come and gone, but students in light clothing were gradually appearing. Kim Dong-hoon, standing next to Yoon Ye-jun, was no different.
Kim Dong-hoon wore black cotton pants that came down to his knees, and a gray sweatshirt on top. Even so, he seemed hot, holding the collar of his shirt and fanning himself. After his morning class, Yoon Ye-jun, thinking about what to have for lunch, didn’t pay much attention to him. Kim Dong-hoon, whose restlessness had lessened as the heat subsided, opened his mouth.
“The student council people are going grocery shopping today, let’s go too.”
“Do we really have to go that far?”
Yoon Ye-jun didn’t feel the need to go along. The student council wasn’t stupid; did they really need him to accompany them grocery shopping? And even if he and Dong-hoon had agreed to help, they couldn’t possibly follow them for every little thing. To the student council members, who were on average two years younger than them, he and Dong-hoon were just two older busybodies.
“The kids feel uncomfortable too.”
“I got a KakaoTalk message asking for help with grocery shopping. It said to bring you.”
“What the heck…”
Yoon Ye-jun grumbled, uncharacteristically. He had just thought the student council wasn’t stupid, but now he wondered if they might actually be.
The festival was just one day away. Yoon Ye-jun still didn’t understand why people got so worked up about a university festival. As he got older, he naturally grew further away from university life, and besides, Yoon Ye-jun wasn’t someone who focused on school life in the first place. Even when he had followed them around to various places, the fact that it was solely because of Kim Jae-ui felt incredibly childish.
At best, he used the festival to make up for missed major classes from his second year by showing up to meet professors, and otherwise attended normal classes. There must have been student input as well. Students who waited for the food stalls and had to meet professors there would naturally prefer regular classes over that, and would rather invest their time in preparing for certifications or their future.
Other universities were talking about getting rid of food stalls, scaling down festivals, or banning late-night stalls, but Hankuk University remained the same. It almost seemed like the professors were having more fun than the students. Why did the professors enjoy it so much? When it got late, they became busy lecturing and meddling with the students who were trying to appease them, so was that what they liked?
Well, that was also the role of a professor.
Kim Dong-hoon, sensing Yoon Ye-jun’s hesitation, lowered his voice.
“You’re going to your part-time job anyway. They won’t keep you until late, so let’s just go for a bit, okay?”
“Fine, whatever.”
At times like these, he got angry at his indecisive personality. At himself for taking on troublesome tasks just so as not to displease others. He should live as he pleased, whether people cursed him or not, but why couldn’t he do that?
Look at Ki Young-han, for instance; he acted shamelessly and as he pleased. Yoon Ye-jun envied his carefree attitude. Just as Yoon Ye-jun thought this, he happened to look up.
“……”
Speak of the devil. Ki Young-han was standing there. Descending the stairs, he looked more disheveled than usual, perhaps tired, a sight rarely seen on campus.
He wore a hat pulled low, with the hood of his sweatshirt pulled over it. His face was hard to see, but Yoon Ye-jun recognized him just by his build. His physique was too distinctive. Ki Young-han was walking, clutching a thick textbook in one hand.
His steady, determined stride towards his destination, without even looking around, seemed odd. Yoon Ye-jun wondered if he was sick.
They had no real reason to contact each other, but apart from that one time they exchanged messages like ping-pong balls on the day Yoon Ye-jun had drinks, they hadn’t really been in touch. Back then, Yoon Ye-jun had said they wouldn’t meet again, but he still felt a little concerned.
Ever since he got to know Ki Young-han, it had always been like this. Rude, and if he couldn’t handle social interactions, he should at least behave himself properly. But he was incredibly good at making people worry.
Ki Young-han’s shoulders, which usually stood straight even when nothing was wrong, seemed slumped. Ki Young-han exuded an aura of wanting to be left alone and not be spoken to, but he seemed to lack the time to even look ahead.
Two people who seemed indifferent to the world were facing each other. The person approaching Ki Young-han was wearing large headphones like earplugs and was only looking at his mobile phone, while Ki Young-han walked with a vacant expression, staring straight ahead. What if they bumped into each other?
Yoon Ye-jun grabbed Ki Young-han’s sleeve as he tried to pass by without acknowledging him.
“……”
He didn’t pull hard, but Ki Young-han stopped abruptly. At the same time, the person coming from the opposite direction of Ki Young-han flinched, trembled, and then passed him, going their own way. Fortunately, there was no collision. However, Ki Young-han looked more surprised than if he had been hit.
His face, shadowed by the brim of his hat, seemed etched with worry. Ki Young-han’s eyes widened. Blinking. Blinking several times, his pupils flickered. Had he been too nosy? Yoon Ye-jun looked up at Ki Young-han, then shifted his gaze slightly.
“…What is it?”
“Uh, well…”
Yoon Ye-jun, despite it clearly not being the right situation, stammered. Ki Young-han, who would normally retort, “What are you grabbing? Let go of this!” instead asked politely. Yoon Ye-jun gave Ki Young-han an awkward, dry smile and spoke.
“You should watch where you’re going. You almost bumped into someone.”
Like Ki Young-han’s reaction, Yoon Ye-jun spoke straightforwardly. Ki Young-han, who had asked so meekly moments before, scowled as if a button had been pressed the moment Yoon Ye-jun finished speaking. Was he quick to anger, or a landmine? Yoon Ye-jun found himself in a difficult position, not knowing where he might explode.
Perhaps…
“……”
“……”
Ki Young-han bit his lip. Yoon Ye-jun glanced sideways at Kim Dong-hoon, who was standing beside him. Kim Dong-hoon looked back and forth between the two, then pretended not to notice, glancing out the window.
“……”
Ki Young-han looked strangely like someone who had been hurt. Yoon Ye-jun didn’t want to get into an argument with Ki Young-han in front of so many people in the faculty building, but the atmosphere now was even stranger.
Yoon Ye-jun rolled his eyes, glancing at the passersby. He had stopped Ki Young-han, and now he was acting this way belatedly; Ki Young-han couldn’t possibly not feel the stares.
Ki Young-han shook off Yoon Ye-jun’s hand.
“Mind your own business.”
Then, he quickly turned his head back to where it was before and disappeared somewhere with a determined, almost huffing stride, more forceful than before. Yoon Ye-jun let out a short sigh. “Haa…” Why was he acting like that? Kim Dong-hoon, who had been looking away, approached Yoon Ye-jun belatedly.
“Why is he like that?”
“I don’t know…”
It was different from usual, but somehow he felt like he understood. However, he didn’t show it.
‘Do you perhaps like me?’
‘What kind of bullshit are you talking about?’
The quiet air from that moment, the clamor from the bustling alley that scattered like tinnitus, and the dark alley far from light, all vividly replayed in his mind like a video on repeat.
‘You came all the way here to apologize. Like me? Wow, you’re really full of yourself. Are all gay people like that? If you’re just a little nice, you think they like you?’
He had probably lost interest in me. Seeing the person in front of him made him even more certain.
That day, I misspoke in the alley next to the bar. I couldn’t properly resolve it and just awkwardly left the situation.
Yoon Ye-jun bit his lip. He was someone who disliked being hated by others. Anyone would dislike being hated, but Yoon Ye-jun found this situation even more uncomfortable. Even if it was Ki Young-han. The reason he had gotten angry at Ki Young-han and then quickly let it go with just one apology might have been because of this.
I should have just stopped Ki Young-han when he ran away that day. Or I shouldn’t have gotten attached to him in the first place. Yoon Ye-jun bit his lip, then gently bit the soft flesh inside his cheek with his teeth.
“Joon-ah, let’s go.”
Kim Dong-hoon nudged Yoon Ye-jun’s shoulder. Yoon Ye-jun looked in the direction Ki Young-han had disappeared, then slowly started walking.
“Young-han.”
‘You should watch where you’re going. You almost bumped into someone.’
Was he looking out for me…?
Ki Young-han was lost in thought. He wasn’t the type to imbue every action and word with meaning, and he detested people who did, but when he encountered Yoon Ye-jun, he found himself doing it unconsciously.
During his school days, when he hated losing to others without a purpose and studied with all his might, he would cut Yoon Ye-jun’s words even shorter than when he was poring over non-fiction or English passages, underlining and marking them with triangles.
You should watch where you’re going.
Watch where you’re going.
You should watch where you’re going.
Watch where you’re going, ahead.
Because I’m here.
He rearranged the word order, tried inserting things, like piecing together a puzzle, but…
“Haa…”
It was impossible.
Ki Young-han was going through the worst period of his life. If drawn as a line, he was at the absolute bottom. His life had been mostly smooth. He had lived without caring much about what others said about him, and apart from his family, he hadn’t formed special bonds with anyone. That’s why he was struggling with others’ feelings and his own for the first time.
If he could have shallow fantasies, it would be one thing, but like someone with paranoia, he dug a tunnel by himself with a shovel, lost in thought. Naturally, whatever he did reminded him of Yoon Ye-jun, making daily life almost impossible.
“Young-han-ah.”
He was so engrossed that he didn’t even hear the voice calling him.
“Young-han-ah…”
Tap, tap. Someone tapped his desk, and he finally looked up. It was Lee Yun-hak. Lee Yun-hak, sitting in front of him, looked at Ki Young-han with an excited face.
“You’re going to the festival, right? I heard Jeon-ui and Eun-hye are coming to school too.”
The people Lee Yun-hak mentioned were Ki Young-han’s classmates.
Ki Young-han opened the textbook on his desk and replied with a perfunctory expression.
“Why would I?”
“Hey, everyone’s really looking forward to it.”
“It’s annoying and just noisy, why would I go?”
Ki Young-han had never enjoyed a festival. Not in his first year either, and he had ignored the seniors’ requests to just show up as a figurehead, going straight home after class.
The professors who checked attendance at the festival booths were just an excuse; at best, he would show his face briefly and leave once he was confirmed. It was literally as he said. Annoying and noisy. He hated the unnecessarily hyped atmosphere even more.
“How can you not go even once? Damn, you’re close with that guy, aren’t you? I wanted to go to the Media Information department’s stall.”
That guy?
Media Information?
Ki Young-han subtly shifted his indifferent gaze to Lee Yun-hak. A bubbly interest began to stir within him. But he had to pretend to be uninterested, so he lowered his eyes to the floor again, then raised them. He casually asked.
“But aren’t you supposed to help with the stall? Aren’t you not opening one this year?”
“Yeah. We decided not to this year.”
“Ah.”
“So I was planning to go to the Media Information stall and get some service since you know that guy. The seniors are working the stall too.”
“Ah, really?”
“But Yoon Ye-jun hyung, isn’t he super nice? He agreed right away when the Media Information student council asked him, ‘Hyung, please help us just once.’”
The moment he heard Lee Yun-hak’s words, Ki Young-han’s nose wrinkled. Shit… He’s not a pushover, is he? Dissatisfaction surged.
“So what?”
“Huh?”
Lee Yun-hak looked dumbfounded. Ki Young-han turned his head sharply. He glared at the students making a commotion amongst themselves, then fiddled with the corner of his textbook. Ki Young-han tried his best to act nonchalant. But he had already made a firm decision. He stopped his restless hand movements and raised his head.
“Hey, Lee Yun-hak.”
“Yeah?”
“…Let’s go. To the Media Information department’s stall, or whatever it is.”
The outdoor tables and chairs, placed at narrow intervals to accommodate as many customers as possible, were common sights outside convenience stores. The tent booth, though seemingly crude, was quite well-equipped. A desk brought from the department office served as the counter, with A4 paper clipped to a clipboard. The paper contained a table with numbered seats.
With so many booths, Yoon Ye-jun initially wondered if anyone would come, but customers kept pouring in. As time passed, the place became so crowded that they had to turn people away. Everyone was busy, but Yoon Ye-jun was even busier, with no time to rest.
“Senior, can you help me move these plates?”
“Hyung, please take this to table number 3.”
“They just bought more ingredients, head to the parking lot!”
The freshmen were inexperienced, and the upperclassmen relied on him. Yoon Ye-jun, with his experience working at a beer house, handled tasks quite skillfully. Next to the festival booth, on the stage, a famous celebrity had just arrived, judging by the cheers of the crowd. Soon, the latest pop songs, which Yoon Ye-jun had heard a few times, began to play.
“Ah, I’m tired.”
Yoon Ye-jun rested the back of his hand on his cheek, listening to the fast-paced dance music. He stood at the entrance and looked around. So many people had come and gone that they had to turn away three or four groups in the last ten minutes alone. The turnover was fast, but it required luck to time the tables becoming vacant, so it couldn’t be helped.
Even with many students serving, clearing tables, and cooking, the intensity of Yoon Ye-jun’s physical labor was doubled. Yoon Ye-jun wasn’t so brazen as to order people around just because he was a few years older, nor could he stand to see things done inefficiently. It was better for him to take the lead.
His body was used to physical work, so that wasn’t the problem; the issue was the attire. Both female and male students had to wear a white shirt on top and black pants or a skirt on the bottom. At the beer house, he didn’t have to worry about his clothes, so he wore whatever he wanted, but now the uniform felt awkward.
Yoon Ye-jun stood with his hands behind his back, staring blankly into the stall. He just listened, wondering when the forced cheerful music would end. It wasn’t just the music. Students who had had a bit to drink were laughing and chatting amongst themselves.
“Oppa.”
Yoon Ye-jun turned towards the voice. Looking down slightly, he saw a student with a youthful face, who appeared to be a freshman.
“Are festivals usually this crowded?”
Hankuk University’s festival was famous. While most university festivals came alive at night and were only run by students during the day, or featured guest speakers for light talks, Hankuk University saw a steady stream of visitors from the morning. Yoon Ye-jun thought this wasn’t because Hankuk University’s festival was fun or had a lot to see, but simply because of the school’s reputation.
“Today isn’t even that crowded. Friday is the busiest.”
Yoon Ye-jun replied kindly. “Oh, really?” the student asked, as if surprised. A gentle smile spread across Yoon Ye-jun’s lips.
“It must be hard, right?”
“No. I’m okay.”
Seeing the student shake his head, Yoon Ye-jun maintained his smile and turned his head towards the entrance. At the same moment, the tent flap was pulled back. He was about to tell a new customer there were no seats, or to bring plates and cutlery for a guest’s companion, when he made eye contact with the person entering and tilted his head slightly.
“Ki Young-han?”
“……”
Ki Young-han stepped inside. Yoon Ye-jun quickly shifted his gaze back inside the stall, scanning the tables.
“Are you here for drinks?”
“Can I not come?”
His tone was still sharp.
Yoon Ye-jun looked perplexed.
“We don’t have any seats right now.”
“Tell them to leave.”
It didn’t sound like a joke. The guy who had looked so glum when they met yesterday was now back to his usual sharp self, so Yoon Ye-jun dropped the gentle smile he had been wearing. A shred of affection. He had no idea why Ki Young-han was here, especially after Yoon Ye-jun’s nonsensical actions might have ruined it.
Was it a coincidence? Or was he mistaken?
He was confused, but Yoon Ye-jun tried not to show it. In human relationships, the first person to show their hand loses. He knew that better than anyone, thanks to Kim Jae-ui. He just had to act as if nothing was wrong.
“You should probably go to another stall.”
“……”
Ki Young-han, who had been chatting and laughing so readily, also stiffened as Yoon Ye-jun’s expression turned serious. Ki Young-han glared at Yoon Ye-jun, then his eyes met the woman standing next to him. The moment their eyes met, the woman, startled, approached a group dressed like a cult: white shirts, black pants, and skirts.
Ki Young-han also glanced at Yoon Ye-jun’s attire. He was dressed similarly, but it didn’t look bad. It even looked neat.
Yoon Ye-jun looked at Ki Young-han, who was scrutinizing him from head to toe, then shifted his gaze.
“Then when should I come when there are fewer people?”
Ki Young-han, who seemed about to turn and leave without a word, suddenly asked a question. Yoon Ye-jun looked up.
“I can’t say exactly when, but it’s probably okay if you come early.”
“Well, alright.”
Ki Young-han finished speaking and turned away as if there was nothing more to see. He lifted the tent flap to find one of Ki Young-han’s classmates, whom he had seen a few times before. There were a couple more people besides him. “Young-han, they said there are no seats, right? That’s why I told you to go somewhere else.” Yoon Ye-jun stood quietly, listening to what Ki Young-han’s classmate was saying.
Did he come all this way on purpose?
He felt a little strange. Yoon Ye-jun looked at Ki Young-han’s back, which seemed like it would disappear in an instant, and unconsciously called out, “Young-han.”
“……”
Ki Young-han calmly turned his head to look back at Yoon Ye-jun.
While Ki Young-han stood still, Yoon Ye-jun opened the icebox that served as a refrigerator. He took out as many canned ciders as there were people. Then, he went to Ki Young-han and held out his hand.
“Drink with your friends. Wherever you go now, it’ll be crowded. Just wet your throat for now.”
Ki Young-han scrunched up his face and then relaxed it. As always, faint wrinkles appeared next to his frown, and his eyes crinkled. Why is he like this… Yoon Ye-jun urged him again, holding out his hand.
Ki Young-han took only one can out of the four in Yoon Ye-jun’s hand. He gripped the tip of the rather large can with one hand and pulled it open.
“Is there one tomorrow too?”
“No, I have work tomorrow, and on Friday, I’ll be at the pub.”
“I understand.”
Then, without any further hesitation, he left the pub. Yoon Ye-jun looked at the spot where Ki Young-han had stood, now empty. Only the cold, dripping beverage can in his hand filled the space where he had been.
The ‘Sexual Communication’ class was replaced by watching a romance movie instead of reading texts. The professor, using the Festival as an excuse, told the students, “You’re all adults, you know what you know, right?” and then played a rather steamy romance film.
The protagonists in the movie didn’t have any special plot; they were simply faithful to their emotions. They kissed frantically, caressed each other frantically, and loved each other frantically.
Ki Young-han watched the movie with his arms crossed, his chin tucked in, and a bored expression. Even if students were absent due to the Festival, shouldn’t the class be conducted properly? Annoyance flared up, and he picked up the coffee in front of him, brought it to his lips, and then looked at the leftover takeout cup that no one had touched.
He had gone to the trouble of preparing coffee, but Yoon Ye-jun hadn’t shown up for the ‘Sexual Communication’ class.
Naturally, Ki Young-han had sent Yoon Ye-jun messages from before the class started until the boring movie continued.
Me
What are you doing.
10:47 AM
Let’s have lunch before class.
10:47 AM
It ends at 11.
10:57 AM
* * *
11:05 AM
Why aren’t you coming to class.
11:58 AM
If you’re skipping, at least say so.
12:17 PM
* * *
12:38 PM
You know you’re really pissing me off.
1:02 PM
The message sent an hour ago was the last one. It was almost 2 o’clock. If you weren’t coming, you should have said so in advance. With a pout, Ki Young-han picked up his Mobile phone. He was about to send another message. But the moment he entered the chat window, the number ‘1’ indicating it had been read disappeared. Ki Young-han stared blankly at the chat window, not even thinking of leaving.
Yoon Ye-jun
Sorry. I should have told you earlier. I got approval to take the day off. I just woke up. I stayed up late yesterday.
1:52 PM
Did you eat lunch? It’s too late… I have work at 7, so I’m free before then. Want to grab lunch after class?
1:54 PM
He was so inconsistent. He’d snap at me, saying not to talk to him, that we wouldn’t see each other anymore, and all sorts of things, making it impossible to even approach him. But then he’d send such kind and affectionate replies, leaving Ki Young-han speechless. It made him feel like the worse person.
Me
I’m watching a movie today anyway.
1:55 PM
Can we meet now?
1:56 PM
He felt even more pathetic for falling for it so easily.
Yoon Ye-jun
Okay.
1:57 PM
I’ll get ready and head out now. It’ll take about 10 minutes.
1:58 PM
Ki Young-han was genuinely annoyed. He was being swayed by Yoon Ye-jun’s whims.
“So damn annoying…”
He muttered the words, his lips moving. He relaxed the tension in his eyes. He knew himself that it was better to just pack up and leave than to expend so much emotional energy over a single message.
Ki Young-han waited for Yoon Ye-jun in front of the Social Sciences building. Yoon Ye-jun’s dorm was the closest to the Social Sciences building. He nervously looked around. Music blared from all over campus, as if playing during study hours was some kind of privilege. The music was incredibly irritating to him.
“Tsk.”
Ki Young-han clicked his tongue. He wouldn’t go to that kind of Festival even if they paid him. Yesterday, after learning there were no seats at the Media and Information department’s pub, he had returned home without a second thought. Honestly, if it weren’t for Yoon Ye-jun, he would have had no reason to drink among those rowdy people.
How long had he waited? Yoon Ye-jun soon appeared. Unlike yesterday, he was dressed casually. It was just ordinary clothing, but he didn’t know why it stood out.
Ki Young-han thought this was a serious symptom of ‘liking someone.’ As he walked slowly from a distance, Yoon Ye-jun pretended to run the last 50 meters, making a show of it, but it didn’t look bad. Still, Ki Young-han grumbled.
“You said it would take 10 minutes.”
“I said it would take about 10 minutes.”
“Why are you running when you’re already so close?”
The two bickered as soon as they met. As Ki Young-han grumbled without reservation, Yoon Ye-jun rolled his eyes. Ki Young-han pretended not to see, averted his gaze, and said, “Let’s go.” What should we eat? Is there anywhere good to eat nearby? While he was thinking, Yoon Ye-jun stood beside Ki Young-han and tugged at his sleeve.
“Young-han.”
“Why?”
“Want to go to the plaza and look around the Festival?”
“Why would I….”
Ki Young-han trailed off.
Just eat – eat and then part ways.
Eat after looking around the Festival – more time together.
Ki Young-han quickly made his decision with a blank expression. Yoon Ye-jun looked up. Did he dislike it? Well, he probably didn’t like Festivals. But the theme of this report was the Festival. Was he unaware, or did he dislike going with me? Yoon Ye-jun pulled the corners of his mouth up and down as if dragging them, then spoke.
“If you don’t want to, let’s just go eat.”
“Who said I didn’t want to? Let’s go see the booths.”
Ki Young-han immediately turned around, as if he hadn’t hesitated at all. Towards the school plaza, where the music was so loud it felt like it was tearing at his ears.
“……”
Yoon Ye-jun watched Ki Young-han’s retreating back, his feelings changing like the flip of a palm. It would be nice if people were a bit more consistent. But on second thought, such predictable behavior didn’t seem to suit Ki Young-han.
“…I don’t know.”
For now, all he could do was follow Ki Young-han.
The plaza had food trucks, a flea market, and simple game booths. It was different from the main stadium, which was lined with pubs. Naturally, the atmosphere was different too. Friends, families, and couples walked around together, buying food, carrying drinks, taking pictures, playing games, doing something.
It actually seemed more vibrant than yesterday. However, Ki Young-han felt awkward. He rarely went to places like this, so it felt unfamiliar. Because of that, he couldn’t stay in one place for long and wandered around.
Yoon Ye-jun walked beside Ki Young-han, naturally looking around the plaza, and said,
“You know the report theme this week is the Festival, right? It’s good we could meet even during the day.”
Did he ask to meet just for this?
Ki Young-han looked down at Yoon Ye-jun, his eyes narrowed. Yoon Ye-jun met his gaze with a perfectly calm expression. Ki Young-han unnecessarily turned his gaze to the opposite side and touched his cheek.
His mood plummeted instantly. Well, he wasn’t planning on doing anything with Yoon Ye-jun at the Festival, but he was reminded anew. They had no reason to meet if it wasn’t for assignments.
It was the same with the food. It wasn’t a fancy restaurant lunch, but Ki Young-han, who was always complaining, never expected to end up eating lunchboxes on a plaza bench. Each of them held a lidless paper box containing steak, grilled vegetables, and rice stir-fried with steak sauce.
“This is delicious.”
Yoon Ye-jun murmured to himself. Ki Young-han glanced sideways at Yoon Ye-jun. Between them sat a wine ade chosen by Yoon Ye-jun and a lemonade chosen by Ki Young-han.
Timely, Yoon Ye-jun placed his lunchbox on his lap and drank his wine ade. The bright red wine was sucked up through the transparent straw. Ki Young-han furtively watched Yoon Ye-jun’s lips. Staring blankly at how he pursed his lips with each sip, he spoke as soon as Yoon Ye-jun put down the cup.
“Can I try this?”
“Sure. Drink up.”
Yoon Ye-jun personally handed him the takeout cup. Ki Young-han pursed his lips, then put the straw Yoon Ye-jun had used into his mouth. He sucked, and the sweet drink filled his mouth.
“It’s good, right? Doesn’t taste much like alcohol.”
“Yeah… well.”
Yoon Ye-jun looked at him for quite a long time at his perfunctory answer. Was it all his imagination, whether he had lost interest or no longer wanted to see him? Had he been assuming things on his own when Ki Young-han hadn’t really thought much about it?
It might have passed as nothing, but Yoon Ye-jun wanted to at least try to say something. Or he could laugh it off, and if his words offended him, he could apologize.
“Um…”
Just as Yoon Ye-jun was about to speak.
“Take a picture.”
[Instant Photos! Polaroid 3,000]
A man, presumably a student, approached holding a sketchbook with crudely written letters. Yoon Ye-jun remained still. He thought Ki Young-han would send the man away even if he didn’t. Of course, the other party would leave feeling quite offended.
“What is it?”
As expected, Ki Young-han asked in a sharp tone. Normally, a person would flinch, but the man smiled a pleasant, sales-oriented smile.
“I’ll take your picture. How meaningful a memory it will be later. Sometimes analog is good, isn’t it?”
Yoon Ye-jun automatically looked from the man to Ki Young-han, then back again. Ki Young-han looked at the man with a blank expression. The man, even with his thick skin, must have felt uncomfortable. Their eyes naturally met. Yoon Ye-jun gave an awkward smile. It seemed better if he just said, ‘No, thank you. We don’t need one.’
The voice came from the other side.
“Okay.”
As soon as Ki Young-han finished speaking, he took out his wallet from his pocket. Yoon Ye-jun looked at Ki Young-han with a stunned expression. Take a picture? Here, now? Ki Young-han, who had grumbled about taking pictures in front of the forsythia just a month ago, was now in this plaza? Sitting on a bench? Holding lunchboxes of steak out of the blue?
“What are you doing? Hurry up and take it.”
Although he received the money, the man holding the camera looked troubled by Ki Young-han’s gruff tone. Yoon Ye-jun subtly tried to get up to give them space. However, Ki Young-han grabbed his wrist, forcing him to sit back down.
“Where are you going?”
“Aren’t you taking a picture?”
“Am I crazy? To take a picture alone here?”
Then are we crazy? To sit here and take a picture of the two of us.
But in the end, it turned out as Ki Young-han wanted. The two of them took pictures, each holding a lunchbox, with the takeout cups of lemon and wine ade between them. Despite the man’s question about whether they couldn’t take it elsewhere, they had nowhere else to go, so they had to maintain their pose on the bench.
Why am I even taking this picture?
Yoon Ye-jun thought as he watched the man hand two photos to Ki Young-han and Ki Young-han readily accept them. “Fan the photos like a fan,” the man said. Ki Young-han gently fanned the photos. A faint breeze, too weak to be called wind, arose. Soon, the image of the two of them slowly appeared within the palm-sized square.
“……”
Yoon Ye-jun was still a little curious, as it was a picture of himself. He leaned slightly towards Ki Young-han.
“Let me see too.”
At that, Ki Young-han flinched. He stared at Yoon Ye-jun with surprised eyes. Yoon Ye-jun leaned his body, placing his hand near where Ki Young-han was sitting.
“I said let me see.”
Ki Young-han’s eyes widened. Yoon Ye-jun seemed oblivious, but Ki Young-han’s heart felt like it would burst. As if it would pop if pricked with a needle. Still, he wanted to be a little closer.
Ki Young-han subtly hid the photo towards his chest. Yoon Ye-jun furrowed his brow slightly.
“Why aren’t you showing me?”
It was because he liked it. He liked Yoon Ye-jun leaning towards him. He liked that he did it without him having to insist. Yoon Ye-jun leaned his upper body further towards Ki Young-han. This time, Ki Young-han brought the photo to his chest.
He wished Yoon Ye-jun would just hug him. That thought crossed his mind. It felt good to meet after a long time without fighting, without hurting each other’s feelings, and acting like usual. Ki Young-han twitched his lips. He barely suppressed a smile. But Yoon Ye-jun didn’t seem to notice.
“Hey, forget it. I won’t look.”
Yoon Ye-jun started to straighten his upper body. Ki Young-han knew that Yoon Ye-jun only indulged him up to three times. He belatedly said, “Look at the photo. Let’s each take one,” and handed it over. While Yoon Ye-jun looked at the photo, he picked up the food he had put down and ate it greedily. He had nothing else to do.
“It turned out well. Can I really have one?”
“Yeah, well…”
“Thanks. The photo turned out well. Maybe it’s because the models are good.”
Laughter was in Yoon Ye-jun’s voice. The more so, the faster Ki Young-han shoveled food into his mouth.
“When do you think you look best?”
At those words, Ki Young-han, who had been eating without pause, flushed as if his face had caught fire. He coughed, startled or choked. Yoon Ye-jun quickly handed him the wine ade next to him.
Ki Young-han, coughing until his eyes were moist, drank the wine ade Yoon Ye-jun had given him. His face was so red it looked as crimson as the wine ade Yoon Ye-jun had given him. He gulped down the drink and placed the empty cup beside him.
“It’s a joke. I won’t tease you, so eat slowly.”
Ki Young-han’s mind was filled with curses.
He’s so damn annoying. Why does he always act so nice? It’s not like he only does it to me, though. He probably acts like this to everyone else too. Handing over the drink he was drinking himself. Putting his hand on my shoulder like now. Ah, it sucks. I like it so much.
Ki Young-han barely suppressed the emotions welling up inside him. Then, pretending to be nonchalant, his face flushed crimson, he asked casually,
“Are we going to look around more after eating?”
“Ah, yeah. We need to organize things for the report, so let’s do this and that. There’ll be a lot to write about this time.”
“I always have a lot to write about. Anyway, you’re really showing off how boring you are.”
Ki Young-han grumbled, but his complaints ended there. He waited for Yoon Ye-jun to finish eating without complaint. He even answered when Yoon Ye-jun spoke to him with a mouthful of food. He wanted Yoon Ye-jun to eat slowly. He wanted it to not be 7 o’clock yet. He wanted to be with Yoon Ye-jun for even a little longer.
Ki Young-han unconsciously tapped his foot and hummed along to the music. He thought that maybe the Festival wasn’t that bothersome or bad, and that doing things with someone else wasn’t always unpleasant or disagreeable.
It was Friday evening. Even though it wasn’t time to open the pub yet, it was already crowded on the last day of the Festival. Because it was the weekend, it wasn’t just students walking around. There were middle and high school students who came to see celebrities, graduates whose main goal was the pubs rather than the stage, and ordinary citizens who came to enjoy the Festival, all bustling around the main stadium.
Yoon Ye-jun still fiddled with the sleeves of his crisp white shirt, then rolled them up. He watched the freshmen laughing and chatting amongst themselves while preparing the pub, then approached Kim Dong-hoon, who was struggling to open the tape on a box of ingredients.
“What are you doing?”
“Ah, why won’t this open? It’s so annoying.”
“Give it here.”
Yoon Ye-jun fiddled with the corner of the tape with his fingernail and skillfully peeled it off. “Oh, cool,” Kim Dong-hoon joked from beside him, and Yoon Ye-jun slightly furrowed his brow but soon played along with the joke. The atmosphere was indeed lively.
Even though he had only helped out on the first day and today, the last day, it had been quite peaceful. With the Festival over and final exams done, the semester would end. It seemed like he might even be able to finish the semester peacefully with Ki Young-han, who was an obstacle and, very occasionally, a self-appointed critic. Well, it wasn’t over until it was over, but still.
“What brings you here?”
While lost in thought, someone from the booth said that. Yoon Ye-jun, thinking he might be needed for something requiring strength, naturally turned his head towards the voice.
“Oh.”
His previously calm eyes widened slightly. Yoon Ye-jun approached the familiar figure and asked,
“What are you doing here?”
It was Ki Young-han again. There were still more than 10 minutes until they started selling. Ki Young-han had popped in alone.
Had he remembered that I would be here on Friday when I came on the first day of the Festival, and that he should come early? But even early, this was too early. The booth wasn’t even open yet.
Ki Young-han put his hands in and out of his pockets, acting awkwardly. He tilted his head slightly, rubbed his neck and jawline with his hand, and swept his hair back. Why is he acting like this again? Yoon Ye-jun waited for Ki Young-han’s answer.
“I came to the booth.”
That was all Ki Young-han said. Yoon Ye-jun took out the Mobile phone he had put in his pocket.
5:50 PM. The booth started at 6:00 PM, so it was a bit ambiguous to tell him to leave, but technically, it was still preparation time. Inside the tent, besides Ki Young-han, everyone was a student from the Department of Media and Information. Usually, people come to Festival booths with others, don’t they? He had come with friends on the first day, so why was he alone today? It was natural to be concerned. Even if it was Ki Young-han, everyone else was from the same department, making him the only one from a different one.
Yoon Ye-jun asked kindly,
“Are you here alone?”
“No. They’ll be here soon.”
“Ah, I see. Come in for now.”
Yoon Ye-jun led Ki Young-han to a table. Ki Young-han pulled out a chair and sat down. Perched on the uncomfortable plastic chair, he crossed his legs and rested his arms on the red table. Yoon Ye-jun left Ki Young-han for a moment to rummage through the portable refrigerator and pull out a cider. Then he returned to Ki Young-han and sat opposite him.
“…….”
Ki Young-han just looked at Yoon Ye-jun sullenly. Yoon Ye-jun said, “Drink,” and handed him the beverage. It wasn’t poisoned, but Ki Young-han stared at Yoon Ye-jun warily before reaching for the drink. His long, slender fingers gripped the can, and he touched the pull tab with his middle finger.
Click. With the sound, he opened the can and took a drink. His tongue, peeking out from his lips, swept across them. Yoon Ye-jun looked at Ki Young-han’s particularly red lips and suddenly recalled him begging for a kiss, but he quickly dismissed the thought.
“Do you have nothing to do?”
Ki Young-han asked, lowering his gaze. Was he asking, or hinting? He couldn’t grasp the intention behind his words. Was he asking why Yoon Ye-jun wasn’t doing his work and was sitting in front of him? It seemed plausible that Ki Young-han would say something sarcastic in this situation. Yoon Ye-jun tapped the table.
“No. I have to help the others.”
“Where are you going?”
And as he stood up, Ki Young-han grabbed Yoon Ye-jun’s wrist. Yoon Ye-jun looked at his wrist connected to Ki Young-han’s hand, then turned to his face. Ki Young-han, pressing his lips together, slowly released Yoon Ye-jun’s wrist, which he had held firmly.
“Stay here until the others arrive.”
Does he mean don’t go…?
Yoon Ye-jun wondered why Ki Young-han was acting like this. So, he pouted his lower lip and looked at Ki Young-han, but as soon as their eyes met, Ki Young-han quickly gulped down his cider. Then, the two sat in silence.
“Ye-jun hyung, could you help me with this?”
Until a junior called out to Yoon Ye-jun.
After that, they didn’t really talk much. Ki Young-han’s classmates soon appeared, and moreover, since it was the last day of the Festival, people who had been waiting around the booth came straight inside, and within 30 minutes, it was packed. Yoon Ye-jun, who was overseeing everything, was inevitably busier than on the first day.
“…….”
Even so, he found himself checking on Ki Young-han intermittently. Ki Young-han wasn’t drinking. He sat among his noisy classmates with an uninspired expression or picked fights unnecessarily. It made him question if they could even be called friends. Sometimes, their eyes would meet, and Yoon Ye-jun, thinking they were at least acquaintances, would approach and say, “Do you need anything? If there’s anything you want to eat, I’ll get it for you.” But Ki Young-han would get angry instead, making it difficult to approach him easily now.
His personality is really strange.
Unlike Yoon Ye-jun, Ki Young-han was full of complaints. He had come to the booth to see Yoon Ye-jun, but he had never properly experienced a university Festival and didn’t realize there would be so many people. It had been crowded on the first day too, but back then, things had stabilized, and Yoon Ye-jun was resting on his feet. And the bigger problem was…
“Ye-jun oppa, did you hear the professor is coming today? They said to clear a table.”
“The professor wants to drink makgeolli. We should get some ready.”
“Hyung, the chives might run out before 9 PM, what should we do?”
“Seonbae, the calculator isn’t working, can you help me with the calculation?”
Yoon Ye-jun was the busiest among the students working at the booth. He could see other seniors, but they all relied on Yoon Ye-jun. Yoon Ye-jun alone did the dishes, served food, carried baskets of unknown contents, handled calculations at the counter, and even cooked.
“Fuck, it’s like I’m some servant.”
It was only natural for Ki Young-han to be angry. Then, a very impulsive emotion enveloped him: the desire to help Yoon Ye-jun. Had he ever in his life wanted to help someone?
The type of people Ki Young-han found most pathetic were those who helped others without expecting anything in return. They should worry about their own situations. He detested people who couldn’t even take care of themselves but claimed helping others was happiness.
So, Ki Young-han barely managed to hold back. However, he couldn’t help but keep looking at Yoon Ye-jun with a frown. His heart urged him to. To look at Yoon Ye-jun, to move his body or glare at him to catch his eye.
“Should we push these tables together?”
“Yes. About three should be enough.”
“Alright. Go do your work. I’ll do it.”
Yoon Ye-jun moved the scattered tables and chairs to one spot. It bothered him that it was next to the table where Ki Young-han and his classmates were sitting.
Seriously, those guys aren’t even helping their senior move tables alone.
Ki Young-han looked at the students with an incredulous expression. With his inherently old-fashioned/bossy tendencies, Ki Young-han was naturally dissatisfied with the current situation. However, the students were busy cooking and doing other things, and in the end, Ki Young-han stood up.
“Need anything?”
Yoon Ye-jun asked Ki Young-han, who had approached him, but he didn’t get an answer. Ki Young-han snatched the table from Yoon Ye-jun’s hand and lifted it easily. Then, he pushed it next to the table Yoon Ye-jun had arranged. He moved the chairs before Yoon Ye-jun could do anything. Yoon Ye-jun just stared at Ki Young-han as if his hands had been taken away.
“What are you doing?”
“…….”
“Why are you helping out, it doesn’t suit you?”
When Yoon Ye-jun said this with a smile, Ki Young-han finally felt embarrassed. Ki Young-han glared at the students bustling around the booth and spoke to Yoon Ye-jun. He wanted to talk.
“Why aren’t those guys helping their senior move tables alone?”
“…….”
Yoon Ye-jun squinted his eyes.
“Young-han, you worry about yourself. Don’t badmouth our department’s students.”
As soon as he finished speaking, Ki Young-han jutted out his chin as if angry and glared. Even though Yoon Ye-jun’s gaze was clearly lower, Ki Young-han’s intense stare made him laugh.
He should thank him for helping, even though he didn’t ask, but his reaction was so rude that Yoon Ye-jun’s playful side surfaced. Maintaining his suddenly upturned lips, Yoon Ye-jun said, his voice clearly playful.
“Huh? I told you, worry about yourself, Young-han.”
After saying that with a playful smile, Ki Young-han could no longer maintain his composure. He returned to his seat with a stiff expression, but he had to get up several more times. As Yoon Ye-jun moved back and forth to their table, Ki Young-han followed him, pretending to help.
Yoon Ye-jun, unaccustomed to Ki Young-han’s behavior, told him to go back to his seat, but Ki Young-han, having drawn so much attention, snapped back, telling him to mind his own business. After doing various odd jobs, he returned to his seat to find his classmates looking at him with surprised eyes. Then, one of them asked in a serious voice, “Young-han, did you borrow money from that hyung?” To which he first responded with an expletive.
Although he swore, Ki Young-han felt quite good. It was because he had been able to help Yoon Ye-jun even a little. Unfortunately, his satisfaction didn’t last long, which was a shame.
The moment he saw professors and the man Yoon Ye-jun liked sitting at the tables and chairs he had moved, Ki Young-han couldn’t hold back his discomfort and displeasure. He wanted to ignore it and turned his body away from that table. However, all his attention was directed there.
The professors, who loved to voice their opinions, naturally laughed loudly, increasing the noise. Amidst their praise for Yoon Ye-jun, Ki Young-han’s ears perked up at the familiar name.
“Ye-jun is really acting like a good senior. He’s so kind.”
“Indeed. I invited him to graduate school, but I don’t know if he’ll come.”
Ki Young-han, who couldn’t even see the table behind him, glanced around. Who were they trying to make a servant out of by inviting them to graduate school?
“Ye-jun is incredibly good to his people. I’m close with him too, and everyone knows how good-natured he is. Even though he’s a junior, there are definitely aspects to respect.”
At the man’s words, Ki Young-han squeezed his eyes shut. This was the man Yoon Ye-jun liked. Infinitely more so than himself. The man who was the subject of Yoon Ye-jun’s words about not being someone he’d just sleep with was praising Yoon Ye-jun.
His classmate, unaware of Ki Young-han’s inner turmoil, offered him a drink.
“Young-han, aren’t you drinking?”
“You drink it yourself. Why are you forcing drinks on me? What era is this?”Ki Young-han snapped back caustically and turned around.” His eyes met the man’s. The moment their eyes met, the man’s expression stiffened. “When did Kim Jae-ui say he was returning to China?” the professor asked. The man, whose expression had stiffened, smiled good-naturedly, narrowing his eyes.
“After I finish the book project. Since you invited me, I plan to help until the work is done.”
“Jae-ui is also a really wonderful friend. Students these days are done after graduation. I get calls on Teacher’s Day from a handful of students. The ones who do call are mostly from older batches. Still, it’s nice to get calls from them as former students, so I’m grateful.”
Jae-ui. Kim Jae-ui.
After repeating the man’s name in his mind, Ki Young-han looked at the empty cider can in front of him.
“Professor, we’re preparing everything so you can have whatever you want, so please relax.”
Yoon Ye-jun was being nice again. At his characteristic soft and gentle voice, Ki Young-han’s stomach churned.
“Ye-jun-ah, sit for a moment before you go. I told the professor we were close.”
Kim Jae-ui, whose voice was now quite familiar, called out to Yoon Ye-jun. When Kim Jae-ui added a word, Ki Young-han finally turned his head. Yoon Ye-jun, who was placing drinks on the table, looked troubled.
“I have to help the others.”
“The others are doing fine on their own, why do you have to help them? Sit for a moment. I even said we were close, so it would be disappointing if you left.”
“I’ll be back in a little while. Please eat first. Call me if you need anything else.”
Yoon Ye-jun resolved the situation skillfully. Ki Young-han glanced towards that table several times. He was bothered by the man. He acted gentle, but he was incredibly irritating.
The man seemed uncomfortable with Yoon Ye-jun not staying despite his request. Especially after claiming they were close, drawing a line in front of the professor. He probably tried not to show it, but he couldn’t hide the twitching muscles in his face. Ki Young-han sneered. He wasn’t a dog wagging its tail when Yoon Ye-jun called, what was he expecting?
Yoon Ye-jun also seemed uncomfortable, serving on the opposite side of the table with the professors, and naturally didn’t come towards Ki Young-han’s side.
Was Yoon Ye-jun acting distant to hide his feelings for Kim Jae-ui? Ki Young-han turned his head several times to figure out the situation.
Ki Young-han’s eyes met the man’s several times. He wasn’t the only one paying attention. The man was too. Kim Jae-ui also looked at Ki Young-han frequently. After their fifth eye contact with an uncomfortable expression, the man finally tilted his head slightly and gave a nod. He smiled lightly, as if he had never been displeased.
Ki Young-han’s temper flared further at that relaxed attitude. He knew it. Between a hasty person and a relaxed person, the relaxed one always held the advantage. Despite knowing this, Ki Young-han ultimately did not return Kim Jae-ui’s greeting. He turned his head back sharply, as if to show his displeasure. Then he bit his lip.
An awkward silence continued, and continued. As it was the last day of the Festival, the students from the Department of Media and Information were predominant. Professors came and spoke like it was a company dinner, and some students from the student council openly roamed around, drinking. Ki Young-han’s classmates, finding the atmosphere uncomfortable, started talking about moving to a second round and leaving, but Ki Young-han remained rooted like a village guardian post.
“Young-han, let’s move to Hanguk Pocha. If we wait any longer, the wait will be hell.”
“Not really.”
“Or, we can go somewhere else. Do you want to go to your place?”
“I don’t want to go.”
“Are you drunk?”
Despite his classmates’ frustrated voices, Ki Young-han remained still. He was displeased with his classmates who were about to leave after eating the complimentary side dishes and drinks Yoon Ye-jun had given them, and the other reason was…
“…….”
All his attention was focused on Kim Jae-ui. Kim Jae-ui, accepting drinks from the professors, seemed drunk. Eventually, he started pouring himself drinks and drank a lot. It was the same now. While the professors and students went out for cigarettes, he stayed alone at the table, drinking soju without any snacks. Seeing him dressed in a suit, a man presumed to be a student council member approached Kim Jae-ui and spoke.
“Jae-ui hyung, I’ve heard a lot about you. The professor…”
“Bring Yoon Ye-jun here.”
Kim Jae-ui, perhaps very drunk, wasn’t acting nice as usual. Yoon Ye-jun was passing by with a pot of fish cake soup, seasoned only with salt, which had half-cooled. As he was about to pass Kim Jae-ui, he stopped at the voice calling him.
Yoon Ye-jun looked down at Kim Jae-ui, who was looking for him with half-cooled eyes. Ki Young-han looked back and forth between Kim Jae-ui and Yoon Ye-jun. The atmosphere was strange.
“Hyung, I told you I’d help the others for a bit and then leave.”
“What’s your problem?”
As the atmosphere turned cold, people inside the booth shifted their gaze towards the two. Those at Ki Young-han’s table also did the same.
“What’s going on?”
“…….”
Despite his classmate’s question, Ki Young-han just watched. Kim Jae-ui let out a short laugh, “Haha,” and rubbed his eyes with his palm.
“Even if you treat me like an idiot, there are limits. Don’t you see your senior as a senior anymore? Did you like making me look bad in front of the professor?”
Yoon Ye-jun looked straight at Kim Jae-ui. He felt mortified. What was he doing at the booth? He didn’t care how drunk Kim Jae-ui was, but Yoon Ye-jun was completely sober. He hadn’t been drinking around tables like the others.
“Come and sit down.”
The student caught in the middle, looking awkward, called out to Kim Jae-ui.
“…Hyungnim.”
“You stay out of it.”
“Sigh.”
Finally, a sigh escaped Yoon Ye-jun’s lips. Yoon Ye-jun tightened his grip on the pot in his hand.
“I’ll just bring this and then go.”
“Just, don’t talk back!”
Kim Jae-ui raised his voice and pulled Yoon Ye-jun’s shirt hem. The fish cake soup, steaming with vapor, swayed along. The fish cake soup, which had been churning like a rough sea surface, wet Yoon Ye-jun’s hand.
“Ah!”
Yoon Ye-jun let out a low cry and, at the same time, dropped the pot and cradled his hand. Ki Young-han felt his heart plummet. He didn’t have time to grasp the situation. What was in front of his eyes was everything.
Kim Jae-ui, drunk and pulling Yoon Ye-jun; Yoon Ye-jun, crying out because of Kim Jae-ui and burning his hand in the hot broth. Ki Young-han felt dizzy. He just grabbed what he could see, and it was an empty beer bottle.
“Hey, Ki Young-han!”
“That crazy bastard!”
Yoon Ye-jun stared blankly at the scene before him. It was a mess. Ki Young-han, with an even more shocked expression than himself, holding up a beer bottle and about to swing it at Kim Jae-ui; Kim Jae-ui, fleeing from Ki Young-han’s insane act; three men, grabbing Ki Young-han’s arm and trying to restrain him despite being much smaller; the professor, teaching assistant, and students who had just entered the pub after finishing their smoke, their faces stunned. Numerous people surrounding them, whispering as if they were having a campfire.
“……”
Yoon Ye-jun looked down at his hand. The stinging sensation made the events unfolding before him feel unreal. Timely, someone brought a towel soaked in cold water. Yoon Ye-jun wrapped his hand with the towel and thought.
Wow, am I going to die?
The student who brought Yoon Ye-jun the wet towel asked,
“Shouldn’t you go to the infirmary first, and then the hospital?”
“No, wait a minute…”
Yoon Ye-jun avoided their gaze and met Ki Young-han’s eyes. Why is he the one acting crazier? Even though I’m the one who burned my hand in the boiling fish cake soup, I’m staying calm, but Ki Young-han looks like he’s lost his mind. At least him…
Yoon Ye-jun eventually approached Ki Young-han. Ki Young-han, who had been huffing like an angry bull, lowered his gaze and looked at Yoon Ye-jun’s hand. He thought Yoon Ye-jun might calm down if he approached, but seeing his hand made him even redder and more flustered.
Seeing the veins bulge on the back of his hand gripping the bottle’s neck, Yoon Ye-jun placed his towel-wrapped hand on Ki Young-han’s arm.
“Young-han.”
“……”
“Stop it and take me to the infirmary.”
It was truly remarkable how Ki Young-han instantly became quiet at those words. His cheeks puffed out, and his nose twitched uncontrollably. As if his goal was to etch wrinkles between his eyebrows, he scowled and then strode out of the pub with long strides.
“I’m going to the infirmary,”
Yoon Ye-jun told the student standing beside him. Then he looked at Kim Jae-ui. Kim Jae-ui, his eyes half-lidded as if drunk, fumbled with his lips in response to the teaching assistant’s question about what happened, and then met Yoon Ye-jun’s gaze. That crazy bastard. Yoon Ye-jun looked at him with annoyance. Kim Jae-ui finally seemed to feel sorry. He called out, “Ye-jun,” but Yoon Ye-jun didn’t even reply, instead chasing after Ki Young-han.
To be Continued in Volume 3.